"""Joke Of The Day"""

[1stRambo]

Yo, how True!!!

JOKE OF THE DAY
SURGERY
On a politician

Three surgeons are discussing who makes the best patient to operate on.

The first surgeon says, “Electricians are the best. Everything inside is color coded.”

The second surgeon says, “No, I think librarians are. Everything inside is in alphabetical order.”

Upon hearing his colleagues’ statements, the third surgeon declared, “You’re both wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There are no guts, no heart, no gonads, no brains and no spine. Plus, the head and the derriere are interchangeable.”

"GTP"

 

[Jackson]

Great commentary!!

 

[Fenton Lum]

Yo, how True!!!

JOKE OF THE DAY
SURGERY
On a politician

Three surgeons are discussing who makes the best patient to operate on.

The first surgeon says, “Electricians are the best. Everything inside is color coded.”

The second surgeon says, “No, I think librarians are. Everything inside is in alphabetical order.”

Upon hearing his colleagues’ statements, the third surgeon declared, “You’re both wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There are no guts, no heart, no gonads, no brains and no spine. Plus, the head and the derriere are interchangeable.”

"GTP"
View attachment 79402

You're the joke of the day every day Rambie.

 

[1stRambo]

Yo, how True!!!

JOKE OF THE DAY
SURGERY
On a politician

Three surgeons are discussing who makes the best patient to operate on.

The first surgeon says, “Electricians are the best. Everything inside is color coded.”

The second surgeon says, “No, I think librarians are. Everything inside is in alphabetical order.”

Upon hearing his colleagues’ statements, the third surgeon declared, “You’re both wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There are no guts, no heart, no gonads, no brains and no spine. Plus, the head and the derriere are interchangeable.”

"GTP"
View attachment 79402

You're the joke of the day every day Rambie.

Yo, you are in the running for the most Hated & Dumb-ass Trophy here on the USMB? I think you have it hands down, Good Luck DA!!!

"GTP"

 

[Fenton Lum]

Yo, how True!!!

JOKE OF THE DAY
SURGERY
On a politician

Three surgeons are discussing who makes the best patient to operate on.

The first surgeon says, “Electricians are the best. Everything inside is color coded.”

The second surgeon says, “No, I think librarians are. Everything inside is in alphabetical order.”

Upon hearing his colleagues’ statements, the third surgeon declared, “You’re both wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There are no guts, no heart, no gonads, no brains and no spine. Plus, the head and the derriere are interchangeable.”

"GTP"
View attachment 79402

You're the joke of the day every day Rambie.

Yo, you are in the running for the most Hated & Dumb-ass Trophy here on the USMB? I think you have it hands down, Good Luck DA!!!

"GTP"
View attachment 79414

Thank you, I would find being in agreement with you very alarming.

 

[Auld Phart]

On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past.
For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."...


The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking.
How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

And God saw it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said,
"Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh.
For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years?
That's a pretty long time to perform.
How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

And God, again saw it was good.

On the third day, God created the cow and said,
"You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family.
For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed it was good.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said,
"Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But the human said, "Only twenty years?
Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back,
the ten the monkey gave back,
and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves.
For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family.
For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information.
I'm doing it as a public service.
If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[Quentin111]

If you ask a question on the American forum, you have help. If you ask a question on the Russian forum, you prove what an asshole you are.

 

[QuickHitCurepon]

Ghost: Wasn't that spirit an investment banker?

Specter: Yes.

Ghost: Why is he moaning like that?

Specter: He's reading the Wail Street Journal.



3650 Jokes, Puns & Riddles, Black Dog & Leventhal Publishers, Inc.

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[ThirdTerm]

The European Organisation for Nuclear Research (CERN) is reviewing security after pranksters filmed a spoof human sacrifice in the grounds of its campus in Switzerland.