had a very quick question for folks

[Quasar44]

Hello, I have this friend who is moving cities but he has nowhere to move to.
He plans on living in his parents house for several months to 2 years until he finds his own home or condo
He is like 47 and he is embarrased and feels like a giant failure

I told this person that I would post for help

Is this ok for a Middle Aged man to move home for a year or so

 

[Harry Dresden]

Hello, I have this friend who is moving cities but he has nowhere to move to.
He plans on living in his parents house for several months to 2 years until he finds his own home or condo
He is like 47 and he is embarrased and feels like a giant failure

I told this person that I would post for help

Is this ok for a Middle Aged man to move home for a year or so

is your friend named Quasar?....

 

[Quasar44]

is your friend named Quasar?....

God damn it !!!!

NO

He is too embarassed to tell anyone
he feels ashamed

I SAID specially its not me
geez

 

[BothWings]

Hello, I have this friend who is moving cities but he has nowhere to move to.
He plans on living in his parents house for several months to 2 years until he finds his own home or condo
He is like 47 and he is embarrased and feels like a giant failure

I told this person that I would post for help

Is this ok for a Middle Aged man to move home for a year or so

Maybe he should head back with mom and dad indefinitely....and then run for office in P.A..

 

[Mr Natural]

Sad.

 

[Alice in Chains]

If your friend is forty seven, then his parents are probably close to seventy, and they might appreciate having a younger person around to help with things that have become burdensome for them.

I'm thinking, if he is planning to get married, living with his parents will probably kill any deals like that. LOL

Why is he concerned about what other people think? Because the odds are, if they are going to think like that, they already are anyway, don't you think?

 

[OhPleaseJustQuit]

Hello, I have this friend who is moving cities but he has nowhere to move to.
He plans on living in his parents house for several months to 2 years until he finds his own home or condo
He is like 47 and he is embarrased and feels like a giant failure

I told this person that I would post for help

Is this ok for a Middle Aged man to move home for a year or so

My mom was a wonderful roommate and I lived with her off and on during my adult life. As an adult, I really enjoyed my friendship with her.

But I was always paying my way. My mom never let me sponge off of her.

Is your friend going to be paying his way? If so, he can certainly enjoy a relationship with his parents as equals.

 

[Seymour Flops]

Hello, I have this friend who is moving cities but he has nowhere to move to.
He plans on living in his parents house for several months to 2 years until he finds his own home or condo
He is like 47 and he is embarrased and feels like a giant failure

I told this person that I would post for help

Is this ok for a Middle Aged man to move home for a year or so

Why is he moving to a city in which he cannot afford a home? Is it specifically to live with his parents, because he could not afford a home anywhere? If so, how is the passage of time going to change that?

Not asking to be mean, I'm asking his situation so I can give some meaningful advice.

It won't be advice like "grow up," or something snarky like that. I work with people whose behavior I try to change all day long, and it is a losing battle most of the time. He needs to look at himself honestly and make a decision based on the most likely scenario, which is that he doesn't change.

 

[Lumpy 1]

Priorities get a lot clearer when you find yourself stuck in hard times.

I'd say, swallow the pride and move in with the parents as temporarily as reasonable, get a job, save money, stop the freeloading, thank the parents and move on..

 

[Quasar44]

If your friend is forty seven, then his parents are probably close to seventy, and they might appreciate having a younger person around to help with things that have become burdensome for them.

I'm thinking, if he is planning to get married, living with his parents will probably kill any deals like that. LOL

Why is he concerned about what other people think? Because the odds are, if they are going to think like that, they already are anyway, don't you think?

I dont know anything about his sexuality
HE IS NOT GAY but seems to not care about women either
Very odd guy
Very not gay is what I gathered from our talks

 

[Quasar44]

Why is he moving to a city in which he cannot afford a home? Is it specifically to live with his parents, because he could not afford a home anywhere? If so, how is the passage of time going to change that?

Not asking to be mean, I'm asking his situation so I can give some meaningful advice.

It won't be advice like "grow up," or something snarky like that. I work with people whose behavior I try to change all day long, and it is a losing battle most of the time. He needs to look at himself honestly and made a decision based on the most likely scenario, which is that he doesn't change.

apparently this non-gay older guy has loaded parents who will get his first condo.
The guy aint too bright and has mental issuesa

 

[Quasar44]

OhPleaseJustQuit

He aint paying this guy

 

[Quasar44]

If your friend is forty seven, then his parents are probably close to seventy, and they might appreciate having a younger person around to help with things that have become burdensome for them.

I'm thinking, if he is planning to get married, living with his parents will probably kill any deals like that. LOL

Why is he concerned about what other people think? Because the odds are, if they are going to think like that, they already are anyway, don't you think?

Thanks

 

[Harry Dresden]

apparently this non-gay older guy has loaded parents who will get his first condo.
The guy aint too bright and has mental issuesa

sounds like you.....who the hell do you think you are fooling?...

 

[Seymour Flops]

apparently this non-gay older guy has loaded parents who will get his first condo.
The guy aint too bright and has mental issuesa

Then I'm going to agree with Alice in Chains. Let him provide companionship and whatever other help he can give them.

Not every parent dreads the idea of a boomerang kid. I myself, used to often wish my house could be like the Cartwrights with my sons living very independent lives, but under the same roof, and with my wife, who would be our Hop Sing. No dice, they all wanted to be on their own as soon as they graduated HS.

The Advice you should give is to his parents, if they'd listen. They should leave him any money in the form of a trust fund that will provide a guaranteed income that he could live on, but not extravagantly. It sounds like a sudden windfall would be gone in no time, and he'd be bankrupt from running out of money and still wanting to spend it.

 

[Quasar44]

sounds like you.....who the hell do you think you are fooling?...

That is utterly untrue
I think the guy is a foreigner or something

Clearly not me

 

[hjmick]

Yeah, this thread is right up there with all those classic "asking for a friend" questions...

 

[Unkotare]

God damn it !!!!

NO

He is too embarassed to tell anyone
he feels ashamed

I SAID specially its not me
geez

Maybe this "friend" should sell his franchise and go get a new job.

 

[Unkotare]

...

Is your friend going to be paying his way? ...

Do you really think Quasa....I mean his "friend" is going to do that?

 

[Likkmee]

God damn it !!!!

NO

He is too embarassed to tell anyone
he feels ashamed

I SAID specially its not me
geez

Does this "friend" happen to detest rain ?