Guess what Trump was doing for three hours while his goons attacked the Capitol.

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schmidlap

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Oct 30, 2020
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After Trump incited his goons to "fight like hell" and deployed them to the Capitol, repeatedly assuring them that he was going with them, as soon as the ugly mob had been dispatched, he had his fat ass hauled back to the White House.

House press secretary Stephanie Grisham reported that he then “gleefully” watched television coverage of the Capitol riot in a private dining room at the White House and praised how his supporters were “fighting” for him, as his aides, family, Fox News enablers, and others pleaded with him to call off his goons.

Before the U.S. House Select Committee to Investigate the January 6th Attack on the United States Capitol reveals the answer next Thursday, let's guess.

What did he do really so for the three hours+ during which he was awol?

  • Covered his ears, and went "La, la, la."
  • Pleasured himself with the lurid images.
  • Washed his hands.
  • Breakdanced to Kanye West tunes as usual.
  • Engaged in his weekly Zumba/Colonic Irrigation Combo
  • Stood behind the drapes.
  • Slipped into his orange spandex leotards, and did his daily workout on his NordicTrack®
  • Reread Proust's A recherche du temps perdu in the original French, making copious marginal notes.
  • Wrote an insincere but obligatory sympathy card to Karen Pence.
  • Licked ketchup off the wall.
 
After Trump incited his goons to "fight like hell" and deployed them to the Capitol, repeatedly assuring them that he was going with them, as soon as the ugly mob had been dispatched, he had his fat ass hauled back to the White House.

House press secretary Stephanie Grisham reported that he then “gleefully” watched television coverage of the Capitol riot in a private dining room at the White House and praised how his supporters were “fighting” for him, as his aides, family, Fox News enablers, and others pleaded with him to call off his goons.

Before the
U.S. House Select Committee to Investigate the January 6th Attack on the United States Capitol reveals the answer next Thursday, let's guess.

What did he do really so for the three hours+ during which he was awol?
  • Covered his ears, and went "La, la, la."
  • Pleasured himself with the lurid images.
  • Washed his hands.
  • Breakdanced to Kanye West tunes as usual.
  • Engaged in his weekly Zumba/Colonic Irrigation Combo
  • Stood behind the drapes.
  • Slipped into his orange spandex leotards, and did his daily workout on his NordicTrack®
  • Reread Proust's A recherche du temps perdu in the original French, making copious marginal notes.
  • Wrote an insincere but obligatory sympathy card to Karen Pence.
  • Licked ketchup the wall.
I thought he was trying to rape AOC.
 
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