I bet you think you're really being clever, don't you, well not so much.
2nd Amendment gives me the right to bear arms.
5th Amendment gives me that right not to be deprived of my life, liberty or property without due process.
Are nuclear weapons arms, no. The average person doesn't have the knowledge or resources to obtain and maintain them, nor do they have the expertise to be able to reliably predict the scale or consequences of their use. Nuclear weapon are not arms in the conventional sense and no they are not covered by the 2nd Amendment.
As for your last little ditty, see the 4th Amendment, it's pretty clear. Of course the courts have also bastardized it beyond all recognition with all their exceptions.
And it took the Supreme Court in Heller page after page to decipher the language of the Second Amendment; to explain what damn near every word meant. So much for black letter law that only needs to be applied. It has to be interpreted. Five justices have one interpretation and four have another. Just like in Obergefell.
Only lawyers say it needs to be interpreted, the folks that wrote it said it says what it says, plain and simple. Their intent was to keep it so simple even the least educated farmer could understand it, then lawyers got involved. Not for the good either.
Explain what due process means. Explain what cruel and unusual punishment is. Explain what probable cause is. If all you need to the plain language, why did it take Scalia pages and pages to explain what the Second Amendment means? While I understand why folks like you, uneducated in the law and not bright to begin with fear having to actually explain what the words in the constitution mean that is why we have law schools where folks can learn the process.
You confuse "understandable" with "comprehensive", for no reason I can understand. The Constitution was never intended to be the sum total of federal law. All it does it lay down the boundaries which lesser laws must fall into. And that certainly is not mutually exclusive to the words making plain sense as written. Quite the opposite, actually.
By the way, phrases like "due process of the law" and "cruel and unusual punishment" do have set definitions, despite your belief that they're somehow murky and unintelligible. "Due process of the law" means "laws shall not be unreasonable,
Arbitrary, or capricious." (Those words also have definitions. Get a dictionary.) "Cruel and unusual punishment" means "torture, barbarity, or any fine, penalty, confinement, or treatment that is so disproportionate to the offense as to shock the moral sense of the community." Neither of those definitions are things that a citizen of average intelligence and education would be incapable of understanding.
Why does it take pages for Scalia to explain his position? Maybe because dipshits like you have so twisted and confused things that it takes that long to untangle it, and to address any possible new messes you might be anticipated to make. While I understand that your ability to mangle the law - or more likely, quote someone who has done so - makes you feel smarter than other people, it really just makes you a weasely sack of crap . . . like most lawyers, come to think of it. THAT would be the process that law schools teach.