DOGE cuts position of Vice President

[Crepitus]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Elon Musk’s Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) has eliminated the position of vice president of the United States, Musk announced on Monday.

“The job of the vice president is to fill in for the president if he falls ill,” Musk said. “This seemed unnecessary since I’m in superb health.”

Musk added that he was inspired to cut the VP position “because JD Vance hasn’t been seen in weeks and no one’s missed him.”

According to sources within DOGE, Vance will immediately be reassigned as a used Tesla salesman.

Musk's Dept. of Government Efficiency Cuts Position of Vice President

The move eliminates an unnecessary government employee.

www.borowitzreport.com

 

[The Sage of Main Street]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Elon Musk’s Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) has eliminated the position of vice president of the United States, Musk announced on Monday.

“The job of the vice president is to fill in for the president if he falls ill,” Musk said. “This seemed unnecessary since I’m in superb health.”

Musk added that he was inspired to cut the VP position “because JD Vance hasn’t been seen in weeks and no one’s missed him.”

According to sources within DOGE, Vance will immediately be reassigned as a used Tesla salesman.

Musk's Dept. of Government Efficiency Cuts Position of Vice President

The move eliminates an unnecessary government employee.

www.borowitzreport.com

Walking Shadow

The Vice-Presidency reveals the political ignorance of our sacred-cow Founding Fodder. He should be a major political figure, such as the Senate or House leader of the President's party. Most of all, he should continue in his duties there. The stupid way it is now, the VP is a do-nothing job.

 

[Crepitus]

Walking Shadow

The Vice-Presidency reveals the political ignorance of our sacred-cow Founding Fodder. He should be a major political figure, such as the Senate or House leader of the President's party. Most of all, he should continue in his duties there. The stupid way it is now, the VP is a do-nothing job.

You realize this is a joke, right?