Colon cancer test and white box ?? Need help

[Quasar44]

Ok I am supposed to take a test for colon cancer and they sent me a white box and gloves

Seems very repugnant and creepy if I am supposed to squat down , spread them and plop out a big gooey, chocolate marshmallow

Is this really what they want ???

A big fudge dragon ?? Yikes

This is utterly shocking

 

[Moonglow]

Ok I am supposed to take a test for colon cancer and they sent me a white box and gloves

Seems very repugnant and creepy if I am supposed to squat down , spread them and plop out a big gooey, chocolate marshmallow

Is this really what they want ???

A big fudge dragon ?? Yikes

This is utterly shocking

To get it into the box, it's best to hold the turd in yer mouth until the box is in place with yer hands.

 

[Crepitus]

Ok I am supposed to take a test for colon cancer and they sent me a white box and gloves

Seems very repugnant and creepy if I am supposed to squat down , spread them and plop out a big gooey, chocolate marshmallow

Is this really what they want ???

A big fudge dragon ?? Yikes

This is utterly shocking

Open the box.

 

[Moonglow]

Make sure it's a tight curl.

 

[1srelluc]

I did mine about three weeks ago.....They started calling and sending me EMs the day after i got it.

LOL.....I usually let it sit there a while.

OK, OK.......Jeez, I'll shit in the bucket.

It came back negative.

 

[shockedcanadian]

Open the box.

 

[Quasar44]

I did mine about three weeks ago.....They started calling and sending me EMs the day after i got it.

LOL.....I usually let it sit there a while.

OK, OK.......Jeez, I'll shit in the bucket.

It came back negative.

Does a robot open it up and examine ?

 

[Quasar44]

I did mine about three weeks ago.....They started calling and sending me EMs the day after i got it.

LOL.....I usually let it sit there a while.

OK, OK.......Jeez, I'll shit in the bucket.

It came back negative.

Is there any technique??

 

[Quasar44]

Do you just place it on ground and bear squat down ?

 

[Captain Caveman]

Ok I am supposed to take a test for colon cancer and they sent me a white box and gloves

Seems very repugnant and creepy if I am supposed to squat down , spread them and plop out a big gooey, chocolate marshmallow

Is this really what they want ???

A big fudge dragon ?? Yikes

This is utterly shocking

The NHS in the UK sent me the test through the post a couple of years ago, I chucked it in the bin.

 

[Grau]

Ok I am supposed to take a test for colon cancer and they sent me a white box and gloves

Seems very repugnant and creepy if I am supposed to squat down , spread them and plop out a big gooey, chocolate marshmallow

Is this really what they want ???

A big fudge dragon ?? Yikes

This is utterly shocking

I'm sorry to hear that there's even a chance you've got c.c..

Having to "produce" a stool sample is pretty routine thing and, yes, they are used to check for internal bleeding, lost car keys and even an occasional gerbil.

Because I don't know, precisely, what your Dr. is looking for and each Dr. does things a little differently, I would simply read the instructions, take your time and try to get it right the first time so you don't have to repeat the procedure.

I've got a different type of cancer but have had to give stool samples for a blood disorder and congestive heart failure.

Practice, practice, practice...

Good luck.......

 

[Captain Caveman]

Do you just place it on ground and bear squat down ?

Depends on how confident you feel on hitting the target. Try from standing on a chair!!

Are you doing the test because it's just routine based on age, or from an examination etc..?

 

[Quasar44]

Depends on how confident you feel on hitting the target. Try from standing on a chair!!

Are you doing the test because it's just routine based on age, or from an examination etc..?

Routine age

 

[Captain Caveman]

Routine age

Same here, so I couldn't be bothered. I'm a one where I believe when my number is up, it's up. I wouldn't want ops, 100 pills a day, and shit quality of life to hang on a few more years. I'm 60 soon and if I reach the average croaking age of 78, that'll do me (and my kids no doubt for inheritance!!)

 

[Quasar44]

Same here, so I couldn't be bothered. I'm a one where I believe when my number is up, it's up. I wouldn't want ops, 100 pills a day, and shit quality of life to hang on a few more years. I'm 60 soon and if I reach the average croaking age of 78, that'll do me (and my kids no doubt for inheritance!!)

Will you be buried or creamated ??

 

[Captain Caveman]

Will you be buried or creamated ??

Cremated.

 

[Quasar44]

Cremated.

Seems so final !!

It’s illegal to be C under Judaism !

Rotting in the ground seems even worse

 

[JohnDB]

It's either putting the turd in the little plastic leftover container in the box or....

Going for a full blown colonoscopy.

Where a team of people take a tour up your bum.

You choose.

 

[JustAnotherNut]

Ok I am supposed to take a test for colon cancer and they sent me a white box and gloves

Seems very repugnant and creepy if I am supposed to squat down , spread them and plop out a big gooey, chocolate marshmallow

Is this really what they want ???

A big fudge dragon ?? Yikes

This is utterly shocking

Doesn't really matter how you get it in the box, they just need a good sample for testing.

 

[ozro]

Don't feel bad, one of our past presidents apparently couldn't figure it out either.....