Angela Merkel practices social distancing by staying 21 million feet away from Trump!

[DrLove]

BERLIN (The Borowitz Report)—In an effort to practice social distancing, the German Chancellor, Angela Merkel, is staying four thousand miles away from Donald Trump, Merkel has confirmed.​

​

Merkel’s decision to decline Trump’s invitation to a possible meeting of the G-7 in Washington was based “entirely on science,” Merkel told reporters.​

​

“Epidemiologists have recommended that, in order to be safe, one should social-distance by six feet,” she said. “It only stands to reason that I will be even safer if I social-distance by twenty-one million feet.”​

​

Merkel said that she was taking the extremely cautious social-distancing measures regarding Trump because of “the danger posed by being in proximity to someone who speaks so loudly and incessantly.”​

​

“His mouth is like a firehose of droplets,” she said, shuddering.​

​

Asked whether she would reconsider a White House visit if Trump agreed to wear a mask, she said, “Donald Trump with a mask is clearly a big improvement over Donald Trump without a mask, but no.”​

​

The German leader added that she could envision making a trip to the Oval Office if “events on the ground change,” most likely in January of 2021.​

Angela Merkel Practices Social Distancing by Staying Four Thousand Miles Away from Trump

Merkel said that she was taking the extremely cautious social-distancing measures regarding Trump because of “the danger posed by being in proximity to someone who speaks so loudly and incessantly.”

www.newyorker.com

 

[Anathema]

Good. The German k*nt and her European counterparts should not be welcome here to begin with.

 

[DrLove]

Good. The German k*nt and her European counterparts should not be welcome here to begin with.

Well cool, Donnie hates our allies anyway. He'd rather have murderous autocrats like Putin, Erdogan, Baby Kim & Duterte show up.

 

[Rambunctious]

Angela is hated by her own citizens....

 

[The Irish Ram]

Merkel is a UN operative, which is why she didn't mind f-ing over Germany and it's citizens in favor of the UN agenda. She is no ally to this country.

 

[CarlinAnnArbor]

Good. The German k*nt and her European counterparts should not be welcome here to begin with.

Well cool, Donnie hates our allies anyway. He'd rather have murderous autocrats like Putin, Erdogan, Baby Kim & Duterte show up.

Hum, I don't think is was Trump who returned the Churchill bust. But if by ally, you mean China, then okay

 

[BULLDOG]

Merkle isn't interested in being a photo op for Trump. Most of the rest of the world feels the same way.

 

[Anathema]

Well cool, Donnie hates our allies anyway...

The US doesn’t have any actual allies. We haven’t in more than 50 years.

 

[DrLove]

Well cool, Donnie hates our allies anyway...

The Us doesn’t have any actual allies. We haven’t in more than 50 years.

No - Not having allies extends all the way back to 1-20-17

 

[22lcidw]

Good. The German k*nt and her European counterparts should not be welcome here to begin with.

Well cool, Donnie hates our allies anyway. He'd rather have murderous autocrats like Putin, Erdogan, Baby Kim & Duterte show up.

The German people suffered from 1914 to after WW 2. And East Germany until the late 1980's. Then this woman comes to power. And she has set the stage for more suffering of the people.

 

[Anathema]

No - Not having allies extends all the way back to 1-20-17

We haven’t had allies since the 1960s.

 

[Maxdeath]

The only allies we have are those with their hands out. The minute we refuse to hand out money on our credit card they move as far away as possible.

 

[MarathonMike]

Merkel is a disaster for Germany. She open Germany's borderes and seeded her own country with a million Muslims. Germany's fate is sealed.

 

[DrLove]

No - Not having allies extends all the way back to 1-20-17

We haven’t had allies since the 1960s.

Did you pluck that butt nugget from deep inside the old anal cavity?

 

[Anathema]

Did you pluck that butt nugget from deep inside the old anal cavity?

Not at all. It’s based on a simple definition of an ally...

An ally is someone who sees you about to go pick a fight with the biggest bully on the block and demands to come along with you, even if they know you’re both going to get butchered.

 

[Tom Paine 1949]

Sorry this is a duplicate.
I didn’t see it the first time.
It got “merged.”
Worth rereading though!
Gotta laugh!


By Andy Borowitz
May 30, 2020

BERLIN (The Borowitz Report)—In an effort to practice social distancing, the German Chancellor, Angela Merkel, is staying four thousand miles away from Donald Trump, Merkel has confirmed.

Merkel’s decision to decline Trump’s invitation to a possible meeting of the G-7 in Washington was based “entirely on science,” Merkel told reporters.

“Epidemiologists have recommended that, in order to be safe, one should social-distance by six feet,” she said. “It only stands to reason that I will be even safer if I social-distance by twenty-one million feet.”

Merkel said that she was taking the extremely cautious social-distancing measures regarding Trump because of “the danger posed by being in proximity to someone who speaks so loudly and incessantly.”

“His mouth is like a firehose of droplets,” she said, shuddering.

Asked whether she would reconsider a White House visit if Trump agreed to wear a mask, she said, “Donald Trump with a mask is clearly a big improvement over Donald Trump without a mask, but no.”

The German leader added that she could envision making a trip to the Oval Office if “events on the ground change,” most likely in January of 2021.

https://tinyurl.com/ycyywb6y

 

[Hellokitty]

Good. The German k*nt and her European counterparts should not be welcome here to begin with.

Well cool, Donnie hates our allies anyway. He'd rather have murderous autocrats like Putin, Erdogan, Baby Kim & Duterte show up.

Weird how no one has an issue with Merkel's close relationship with Putin...

 

[Tom Paine 1949]

Hellokitty writes:
“Weird how no one has an issue with Merkel’s close relationship with Putin...”

Merkel has a very clear understanding of what Putin is, and Putin knows she is no pushover. She grew up in East Germany, and Putin speaks fluent German, so they have long taken each other’s measure. Putin fears both united Germany and the expanding borders of NATO. The Trump administration and the U.S. generally has had little respect for German interests in recent years, and would have done well to listen to more German advice, for example when it warned against invading Iraq and supporting Islamic extremists seeking to overthrow Assad. Of course the resulting refugee problems were mainly born by countries like Turkey and Germany. Also, the Trump Administration bullies Germany on trade, using secondary sanctions to prevent its businessmen from trading with countries the U.S. opposes, sabotaging the Northstream2 pipeline from Russia to Germany, etc.

 

[DrLove]

Hellokitty writes:
“Weird how no one has an issue with Merkel’s close relationship with Putin...”

Merkel has a very clear understanding of what Putin is, and Putin knows she is no pushover. She grew up in East Germany, and Putin speaks fluent German, so they have long taken each other’s measure. Putin fears both united Germany and the expanding borders of NATO. The Trump administration and the U.S. generally has had little respect for German interests in recent years, and would have done well to listen to more German advice, for example when it warned against invading Iraq and supporting Islamic extremists seeking to overthrow Assad. Of course the resulting refugee problems were mainly born by countries like Turkey and Germany. Also, the Trump Administration bullies Germany on trade, using secondary sanctions to prevent its businessmen from trading with countries the U.S. opposes, sabotaging the Northstream2 pipeline from Russia to Germany, etc.

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner ^ Thank you!