Which is it's own kind of stress, really. The reason why these adult children aren't getting kicked out of the house is more often than not, they leave college with mountains of debt and no one is offering them that $50,000 a year job they were promised.
So they work no job?
It's not just college kids, it's a lot of them college or not. You think it's stressful because you are thinking back to when we were kids. Remember there was (what we called) a Generation Gap between us and our parents. We got along okay, but they were totally different people from a totally different generation.
When we had kids, we treated them like friends more than children. When I used to play my music a little too loud, my parents would yell for me to shut off that Rock N Roll. With our kids, we listen to Rock N Roll with them.
And let's face it, there is no tough love today. When I was a kid, my parents didn't give me a dime so I never grew up with that entitlement mentality. One time I asked my bricklayer father for five dollars. He asked what makes me think he has five dollars to give? I told him that he worked so he got money that way. He said "If that's the way I get my money, that's the way you're going to get yours......get in the van!"
My father paid me one dollar an hour to mix cement, carry clamps of bricks to the job site, carry 8" block to the site, help erect scaffolding, and I came home exhausted. Today, parents just hand kids over money like it grew in the backyard.
So I don't see the stress because we have a totally different relationship with our children today compared to when we were kids. Like most younger people back then, I couldn't wait to get my own apartment, and I moved out of home at the age of 20.
I don't know how old you are, but I am 55, and frankly, I was the only one in my generation who didn't smoke pot. I was a nerd before it was cool. The craziness of piss-testing everyone didn't really come into vogue until the late 1980's.
Amusing exchange between my CO and I when I was in the service. We were all in line for a drug test and he says to me, "You aren't taking drugs, are you Sergeant B#######?"
"No, Sir. I'm like this normally, Sir!!!"
Even though we weren't supposed to make smart ass comments during this test, he laughed.
The guy behind me, another Sergeant. He got caught hot for cocaine. He got demoted and his career was pretty much over at that point. And he was good at his job.
Correct, you were one of the few. I was just the opposite. But even though we didn't have drug tests back then, if it came down to work or smoke, I would have given up the pot. After all, it's what I had to do when I decided to become a truck driver. By federal law, my employer has to drug test his employees.
Believe it or not, I used to be a pot smoking, long haired liberal and a lead guitarist in a rock band, hated the police and against any kind of war, or as they say......military action.