What I don't see in any of Amanda's photos is a happy face.
Life hasn't been very happy lately. And I look like a complete moron when I smile. I try to shoot for sultry... I don't think I pull it off but I never hear the boys complain.
I hear you. Life isn't always happy. When I met my wife, (yes, we just got legally married in July just before Prop 8 shut it down) I thought she was the most beautiful woman I'd ever met. I still think of her that way. It was her eyes that drew me in, very clear and mischievous.
She's the naughtiest, funniest, brightest and most talented woman I've met. I'm so lucky she picked me--she picked ME. She knew from the moment we met--I was the one.
I was a bit denser and more damaged. She did a complete background check on me and I passed with flying colors.
We met at a Buddhist meditation retreat. We sat across from each other in the library. She looked up at me and said, "Do I know you?" with this big grin on her face. I looked at her and said, "you look familiar, have we met before?"
She said, yes. I met you at BPD, but you were mighty busy. I was with Dk she said. I said oh yeah--out of context. (BPD was a networking organization for gay and lesbian professional women). I'd noticed her, but I had about three working dramas going on with other women at that meeting.
Then the retreat started, and you don't talk or even look at each other. It's quite a beautiful way to open the heart, you aren't your story, you're just another human being, sitting, walking, eating, praying and resting in silent awareness.
At the end of the retreat she asked me my name and my phone number. Then she did her background check and called me for a date on Valentine's Day. I was socially a busy gal with dates and I put her off for two weeks.
The first date was special, but I had an old girlfriend I had to straighten things out with. The rest unfolded quickly.
I've always been difficult about committment and I really challenged her in the early years. We are very happy with each other and I know I will continue to spend the rest of my life with her.
I enjoy looking at beautiful women as much as the next one--but I've no interest in straying--not even a bit.
This is the most complex interesting woman I've ever met.
