Supreme Court Gathers To Watch Baby Justices Hatch
News • Supreme Court • kids • News • ISSUE 51•02 • Jan 13, 2015
News • Supreme Court • kids • News • ISSUE 51•02 • Jan 13, 2015
The Supreme Court, which has closely monitored the development of the judicial embryos for several months, rescheduled arguments in a workplace discrimination case on the docket in order to observe the fledgling justices penetrate the hard outer membranes of the eggs with their tiny gavels, emerging from the shells and screaming unanimous opinions about the sanctity of the Fifth Amendment.
“Aw, how cute, they’re so little that they can’t even hold their heads up or interpret the original intent of the Constitution yet,” Associate Justice Anthony Kennedy said of the trembling, gasping baby legal scholars whose feeble bodies were still slick with yolk and coated with shell fragments after the hatching process. “They look so harmless now. They don’t know any precedents yet. It takes time, but several decades down the line they’ll be unbelievably powerful.”
“Aw, how cute, they’re so little that they can’t even hold their heads up or interpret the original intent of the Constitution yet,” Associate Justice Anthony Kennedy said of the trembling, gasping baby legal scholars whose feeble bodies were still slick with yolk and coated with shell fragments after the hatching process. “They look so harmless now. They don’t know any precedents yet. It takes time, but several decades down the line they’ll be unbelievably powerful.”
