Stimulating!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by froggy, Jul 23, 2010.

  1. froggy
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    froggy Gold Member

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    Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic
    Stimulus' payment.



    This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by
    using a Q & A format:


    Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ?

    A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.


    Q.. Where will the government get this money ?

    A. From taxpayers.


    Q. So the government is giving me back my own money ?

    A. Only a smidgen of it.


    Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?

    A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a
    high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.


    Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

    A. Shut up.


    Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:




    * If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China or Sri Lanka .


    * If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.


    * If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or China .



    * If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico ,
    Honduras and Guatemala .



    * If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea .




    * If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .



    * If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go
    to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.


    Instead, keep the money in America by:


    1) Spending it at yard sales, or

    2) Going to ball games, or

    3) Spending it on prostitutes, or

    4) Beer or

    5) Tattoos.


    (These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )



    Conclusion:

    Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day!


    Got this in an e-mail.
     
  2. AquaAthena
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    AquaAthena INTJ/ INFJ

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    I do not want to be spoon-fed. I like to earn my rewards...
     
  3. Gremlin-USA
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    Gremlin-USA <<< Me in 1970

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    But make sure the Ink was made in the USA, The Prostitute has Papers and the Beer is not Import


    Aggghhhh..., so much to keep track of :lol::lol:


    .
     
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  4. froggy
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    froggy Gold Member

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    What if everyone applied it to our debt with china?
     
  5. Paulie
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    Paulie Platinum Member

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    Ha!

    What's the total amount of stimulus they're going to send out? Maybe 100 billion if that?

    We owe China ZILLIONS.
     

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