Madeline
Rookie
- Banned
- #1
We all lie, to ourselves if no one else. I'm good with everyone adjusting the controls on their reality-viewers, a little at least. We all need that.
But folks, some of the lies we tell are just goofy little habits or laziness. I object to both of these classes of lies. Put some effort into your lying. Be a bit original. Use a backstory occassionally.
In this vein, here are examples of some types lies I don't care for:
* I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.
Give me a break. You dream up MUCH sicker shit than this whenever you ponder why you hate the fucker. Sometimes, you even scare yourself with the twisted stuff you come up with.
* I'd love to, but I'm not allowed.
You're not denying yourself anything you truely love just because some doctor said so. If you could give it up, you didn't LOVE it.
* I would NEVER even think of doing that.
C'mon. You've been fantasizing all your life. Whatever the "bad thing" is you are referring to, it's not even on your top ten list.
* How are you?
I realize this is just a breathy way to say "hello". I do. But yanno, if you would simply choose instead to say "hello" we could skip the social dousie-do I have to perform each time you prompt me with this cue.
* O, I'm sorry. I have to run now. Someone's at the door. Let me call you back.
What's wrong with "I'm bored. I want to masterbate now. Bye."?
* Hi! I'm with the government and I'm here to help!
If you're gonna rape me, I'd prefer we not call it a date.
But folks, some of the lies we tell are just goofy little habits or laziness. I object to both of these classes of lies. Put some effort into your lying. Be a bit original. Use a backstory occassionally.
In this vein, here are examples of some types lies I don't care for:
* I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.
Give me a break. You dream up MUCH sicker shit than this whenever you ponder why you hate the fucker. Sometimes, you even scare yourself with the twisted stuff you come up with.
* I'd love to, but I'm not allowed.
You're not denying yourself anything you truely love just because some doctor said so. If you could give it up, you didn't LOVE it.
* I would NEVER even think of doing that.
C'mon. You've been fantasizing all your life. Whatever the "bad thing" is you are referring to, it's not even on your top ten list.
* How are you?
I realize this is just a breathy way to say "hello". I do. But yanno, if you would simply choose instead to say "hello" we could skip the social dousie-do I have to perform each time you prompt me with this cue.
* O, I'm sorry. I have to run now. Someone's at the door. Let me call you back.
What's wrong with "I'm bored. I want to masterbate now. Bye."?
* Hi! I'm with the government and I'm here to help!
If you're gonna rape me, I'd prefer we not call it a date.
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