Joke anyone?

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Jeremy, Oct 20, 2010.

  1. Jeremy
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    Jeremy TRANSFER!!!

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    This place needs a little humor today...

    Ole and Lena was at the kitchen table for the usual morning cup of coffee and listening to a weather report coming from the radio.
    "There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. All vehicles should be parked on the odd-numbered side of the streets today to facilitate snowplows," the radio voice declared.

    "Oh, gosh, OK," said Ole, getting up, bundling up and heading outside to dutifully put his car on the odd-numbered side of the street.

    Two days later, Ole and Lena were at morning coffee when the radio voice said:

    "There will be 2 to 4 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your vehicles on the even-numbered side of the streets."

    Ole got up from his coffee as before. He bundled up, shuffled off, and put his car on the even-numbered side of the street.

    A few days later, the couple was at the table when the radio voice declared:

    "There will be 6 to 8 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the ..." Just then, the power went out.

    "Park it where?" Ole asked in the dark, "What should I do?"

    "Aw, to heck with them, Ole," Lena said, "Don't worry about it today. Just leave the car in the garage."
     
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  2. Sarah G
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    Sarah G When Nothing Goes Right, Go Left Supporting Member

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    :lol::lol:

    I'm stealing it..
     
  3. Colin
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    Colin Gold Member

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    Talking of snow.......

    A woman goes on vacation to the Caribbean wishing her husband had been able to join her.
    Upon arriving she meets a stunning black man, and after a night of passionate lovemaking she asks him, “What is your name?
    “I can’t tell you!” says the man.
    Every night they meet and every night she asks him what his name is, but he always refuses to tell her.
    On her last night she asks him again, “ Please tell me your name.”
    “I can’t because you’ll just laugh and make fun of me.” He says.
    “I promise i will not laugh,” she says.
    “OK. Fine. My name is Snow.” The man replies.
    Upon which the lady bursts into laughter. “ The guy gets real mad and says, “There, I knew you would laugh!”
    The lady said, “No. I’m thinking of my husband and what he’ll think when I tell him I’ve had ten inches of snow every day in the Caribbean!”
     
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  4. Jeremy
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    Jeremy TRANSFER!!!

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    Ole and Lena got married. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena's knee. Giggling, Lena Said, "Ole, you can go farther if ya vant to"... so Ole drove to Duluth.
     
  5. Jeremy
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    Jeremy TRANSFER!!!

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    Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does it take to fly from Minneapolis to Fargo? "Just a minute," said the busy clerk. "Vell, said Lena, "if it has to go dat fast, I tink Ill just take da bus."
     

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