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Ooh, I got one; When the Puritans had witch trials, they were exercising their "religious freedom"
Talking to a Republican can be frustrating. Often, it seems like they are speaking an entirely different language -- and in many cases, they are! For this reason, in the hopes of facilitating cross-party dialogue and mutual understanding, I have compiled what I believe to be the first comprehensive Republican-to-English dictionary, featuring words commonly used by Republicans, and their English translations, alphabetized for your convenience:
America (United States of): A country located in the N. Western Hemisphere that is #1.
Bible: A sacred text that provides incontestable answers when thumped.
Birth Certificate: An official birth record required of all US Presidents, regardless of race, since 2008.
Capitalism: A system of economic organization that has never been attempted.
Christmas: A holiday commemorating the birth of Jesus Christ, now rarely celebrated due to persecution by atheists.
Compromise: (uncommon) A form of political suicide.
Coast (East): A very bad coast of the continental United States.
Coast (West): Another really inexcusable coast.
Communism: The belief that the government should ever do anything.
Condescending: Accurately informed.
Constitution (U.S.): The hallowed founding document of the United States, the text of which must be interpreted strictly and amended immediately.
Corporations: Large people who are overtaxed.
Deficits: 1) Fiscal shortfalls incurred by Democrats that threaten to bankrupt the country. 2) Fiscal shortfalls incurred by Republicans that don't matter.
Democrat: A political party.
Election: A method of selecting representatives, the fraudulence of which may be determined by the outcome.
Elitist: Qualified, or educated.
Endangered Species: Animals that have it coming.
Evolution: A theory of human origins that is out there.
Extremist (Liberal): Espousing or adhering to political beliefs that are held by only a majority of Americans.
Fact: Information that has been verifiably posted to a RedState comment board.
Forest (National): Trees that have it coming.
Gut: Region of the body from which decisions should be made.
Homosexuality: A membership-only lifestyle organization that perpetuates itself through youth recruitment.
Hitler: A man to whom it would be inappropriate to compare President Obama in spite of the many uncanny similarities.
Jesus: Charismatic religious leader and son of God; born in Bethlehem in the year 0; beliefs include love, charity, enhanced interrogation, privatized healthcare, elimination of the estate tax, and the right to carry concealed semiautomatic weapons.
From: Jonathan Bines: How to Speak Republican
Etc......
I would add, lamestream media, gun-grabbers, job-killers, libtard, and others that I can not remember at the moment because I have not listened to Sarah Palin and Limbaugh for years.
How to speak Democrat:
Bush did it.
Don't forget some rant about Reagan and "the great collapse of the middle class" under him or whatever
Deficits: 1) Fiscal shortfalls incurred by Democrats that threaten to bankrupt the country. 2) Fiscal shortfalls incurred by Republicans that don't matter.
Ooh, I got one; When the Puritans had witch trials, they were exercising their "religious freedom"
Were the witch trials conducted by Congress and the Tea Party, sploogy?
democrats think George Washington burned witches on the Delaware....
Talking to a Republican can be frustrating. Often, it seems like they are speaking an entirely different language -- and in many cases, they are! For this reason, in the hopes of facilitating cross-party dialogue and mutual understanding, I have compiled what I believe to be the first comprehensive Republican-to-English dictionary, featuring words commonly used by Republicans, and their English translations, alphabetized for your convenience:
America (United States of): A country located in the N. Western Hemisphere that is #1.
Bible: A sacred text that provides incontestable answers when thumped.
Birth Certificate: An official birth record required of all US Presidents, regardless of race, since 2008.
Capitalism: A system of economic organization that has never been attempted.
Christmas: A holiday commemorating the birth of Jesus Christ, now rarely celebrated due to persecution by atheists.
Compromise: (uncommon) A form of political suicide.
Coast (East): A very bad coast of the continental United States.
Coast (West): Another really inexcusable coast.
Communism: The belief that the government should ever do anything.
Condescending: Accurately informed.
Constitution (U.S.): The hallowed founding document of the United States, the text of which must be interpreted strictly and amended immediately.
Corporations: Large people who are overtaxed.
Deficits: 1) Fiscal shortfalls incurred by Democrats that threaten to bankrupt the country. 2) Fiscal shortfalls incurred by Republicans that don't matter.
Democrat: A political party.
Election: A method of selecting representatives, the fraudulence of which may be determined by the outcome.
Elitist: Qualified, or educated.
Endangered Species: Animals that have it coming.
Evolution: A theory of human origins that is out there.
Extremist (Liberal): Espousing or adhering to political beliefs that are held by only a majority of Americans.
Fact: Information that has been verifiably posted to a RedState comment board.
Forest (National): Trees that have it coming.
Gut: Region of the body from which decisions should be made.
Homosexuality: A membership-only lifestyle organization that perpetuates itself through youth recruitment.
Hitler: A man to whom it would be inappropriate to compare President Obama in spite of the many uncanny similarities.
Jesus: Charismatic religious leader and son of God; born in Bethlehem in the year 0; beliefs include love, charity, enhanced interrogation, privatized healthcare, elimination of the estate tax, and the right to carry concealed semiautomatic weapons.
From: Jonathan Bines: How to Speak Republican
Etc......
I would add, lamestream media, gun-grabbers, job-killers, libtard, and others that I can not remember at the moment because I have not listened to Sarah Palin and Limbaugh for years.
How to speak Democrat:
Bush did it.
Don't forget some rant about Reagan and "the great collapse of the middle class" under him or whatever
How to speak Democrat:
Bush did it.
Don't forget some rant about Reagan and "the great collapse of the middle class" under him or whatever
The middleclass exploded under Reagan, and America experienced the greatest era of economic prosperity in history under him.
The middleclass exploded under Reagan, and America experienced the greatest era of economic prosperity in history under him.
Forgot about the Middle Class imploding under his successor Bush?
Forgot about the Middle Class exploding under Clinton?
Forgot about the Middle Class imploding under another Bush?
Forgot about the Middle Class imploding under his successor Bush?
Forgot about the Middle Class exploding under Clinton?
Forgot about the Middle Class imploding under another Bush?
Forget about you ever posting anything rational.....
Forgot about the Middle Class imploding under his successor Bush?
Forgot about the Middle Class exploding under Clinton?
Forgot about the Middle Class imploding under another Bush?
Forget about you ever posting anything rational.....
I see you attended Knee-Jerk Republican Revisionist University.
The middleclass exploded under Reagan, and America experienced the greatest era of economic prosperity in history under him.
Ronald Reagan mollywhopped the shit out of poverty!!! And he would've mollywhopped the SHIT out of Ukraine by now!!!
Don't know what mollywhop means? Probably because Ronald Reagan is the only human do ever live with a long enough penis to be capable of it!!!
All Hail the Gipper!!!
The middleclass exploded under Reagan, and America experienced the greatest era of economic prosperity in history under him.
Ronald Reagan mollywhopped the shit out of poverty!!! And he would've mollywhopped the SHIT out of Ukraine by now!!!
Don't know what mollywhop means? Probably because Ronald Reagan is the only human do ever live with a long enough penis to be capable of it!!!
All Hail the Gipper!!!
That Alzheimer patient tripled the national debt, and unemployment skyrocketed to 8%. He sold chemical weapons to Iraq, gave $3 billion worth of weapons to the Taliban, and called them freedom fighters. He sold cocaine with Noriega and used the profits to buy guns for the contras. He closed the funny farms and threw the nut jobs out on the street. But hey, it's gotta be easier for republicans to live in fantasy land than to face the truth.
