Hotel sex

[strollingbones]

we were at the obx....i went walking on the north point and lost track of time...and suffered a hellish sun burn...so we decided to drive back inland and get a motel room...we ended up driving to plymoth nc...a very small town....see a hotel and check in...its ran by indians..gandi not native....the check in guy acts odd....so we get to the room and i go to grab a couple of cokes out of the machine...the guys at the machine act odd....so off we go to eat.....the waiteress asks where we are staying....we tell her...and suddenly she stops talking to me...soooooooooo we get back to the hotel....hubby turns on tv....full on porno....he is like maybe this isnt x rated.....i am like...honey hush that is all illegal in nc...the sex acts they were showing...the place is packed with fishermen and boats.....the next morning....its a ghost town...everyone is gone....except the hookers....we managed to stay in one of the few brothels near the coast.....way to go hubby.

we are staying in a condo in gatlinburg tn....the upper condo..someone is beating the hell outta the door...yelling....we ignore it....so i go outside on the balcony and i hear a man's voice ..."can you help me" i run back into the condo...and tell hubby.....the upper condo...someone is now pounding the door screaming....so hubby goes out on balcony....and talks to man's voice...
two teenagers upstairs have locked themselves on the balcony...the beating and yellling is from the girls father.....they are locked out of the condo when the stupid kids got locked on the balcony...so hubby gets condo keys from kids and goes to take them to madder than hell father of the girl...i am outside asking the kids if they need some clothes to put on...they laugh and swear they are fully dressed..father was not impressed by the story.....

the worst: we are in a condo at the beach....real nice place....son is very young and very asleep in his own room...hubby and i are on the sofa....we begin to mess about.....i am nekkid...he is not...when suddenly with no knock or anything....a man opens the door and walks in...hubby manages to cover me with his body and is rather loudly telling the guy to get the fuck out of our condo...the guy was a carpet cleaner....i think that is one of the maddest i have ever seen hubby

 

[Phoenix]

Walls.

Walls and doors are good backrests.


That and not caring if the neighbors hear.

 

[Big Black Dog]

I was in the hotel once trying to get some sleep. It's about 3:00 am and all I can hear is some woman beating on my hotel door and screaming. Can't sleep like this. I had to get up out of my bed and let her out before I could ever get to sleep...

 

[Phoenix]

I was in the hotel once trying to get some sleep. It's about 3:00 am and all I can hear is some woman beating on my hotel door and screaming. Can't sleep like this. I had to get up out of my bed and let her out before I could ever get to sleep...

It's a good thing I'm scared of Mrs. BBD. I'd have to kidnap you just because you make me laugh, my friend.

 

[Blagger]

I think my fondest memory of mine and Mrs. Swagger's holiday in Thailand was the amount of money we saved. We arrived fully intent on seeing, doing and eating everything the Golden Triangle had to offer, but then we met a chap who sold us half a brick of opium and we spent the whole time camped-out in our hotel room stoned and hammering away at each other like a couple of horny praire mice. Honestly, by the end of most nights, I was near enough ejaculating dust.

Happy daze...

 

[Trajan]

Anyone got any crazy stories? Or even just a cool story bro?

you lookin' for tips?

 

[Trajan]

I was thinking about taking a girl down to the hotel kitchen and tossing a salad. What do you think of that?

Extra dressing??

I'm fond of ranch myself.

raunch you mean?

 

[Paulie]

Anyone got any crazy stories? Or even just a cool story bro?

you lookin' for tips?

Well I've never been with a woman, so I'll take all the advice you're willing to give buddy.

 

[Midnight Marauder]

Only three types of married sex:

All over sex: This is sex everywhere. Hotels, Ferris Wheels, kitchen counter, pool table, floor, etc.

Bedroom Sex: Sex confined mainly to the bed.

Hallway Sex: By far the best -- late in the marriage, the lovers pass in the hallway and both say, "Fuck You."

And there you have it folks!