Here are some rules, have you tried "friends with benefits?"

[mudwhistle]

This is the kind of post that scares me. If mudwhistle is a parent, his kids are going to be burried in therapy bills.
With my luck they'll buy the house next door.

Please, you honestly think you can use women and that's not going to effect your children?

Now something new - amazing! I have not posted my thoughts about 'friends with benefits' because I don't have any. Not yet anyway. I respect women, and I am engaged to a feminist. She has expressed a postive attude on the subject of friends with benefits, but like myself has no experience. We are as interested as anyone else here to read posts.

In the past I have posted sexual questions, and ended up being blamed for the content of the thread as prudes blew things out of perspective. This time place your blame on the writer of the article, Joseph Mathews.

Setting up barriers like you have laid out only comes across as cold and calculated.

I think you should stop worrying about becoming too close to someone.

Try being more honest with them instead of more distant.

 

[Kalam]

She has expressed a postive attude on the subject of friends with benefits, but like myself has no experience. We are as interested as anyone else here to read posts.

In my experience, it sort of sucks. It makes friendships awkward... the relationship is changed permanently and going back to being "just friends" doesn't really work out.

 

[jillian]

There's nothing wrong with the concept of friends with benefits if it suits the needs of both parties. the problem with the description in the O/P, as I see it, is that the friendship part seems to be missing from the relationship.

 

[mudwhistle]

She has expressed a postive attude on the subject of friends with benefits, but like myself has no experience. We are as interested as anyone else here to read posts.

In my experience, it sort of sucks. It makes friendships awkward... the relationship is changed permanently and going back to being "just friends" doesn't really work out.

Then don't fuck her.

You don't have to screw every girl that makes you horny.

I can't stand a meaningless fuck.

I like it to be a close personal experience.

But just having sex shouldn't mean you own someone or are obligated....but it does mean a level of trust exists.

 

[Avatar4321]

This is the kind of post that scares me. If mudwhistle is a parent, his kids are going to be burried in therapy bills.
With my luck they'll buy the house next door.

Please, you honestly think you can use women and that's not going to effect your children?

Now something new - amazing! I have not posted my thoughts about 'friends with benefits' because I don't have any. Not yet anyway. I respect women, and I am engaged to a feminist. She has expressed a postive attude on the subject of friends with benefits, but like myself has no experience. We are as interested as anyone else here to read posts.

In the past I have posted sexual questions, and ended up being blamed for the content of the thread as victorian prudes blew things out of perspective. This time place your blame on the writer of the article, Joseph Mathews.

That poor poor woman.

But then not everyone has good tastes.

 

[Kalam]

She has expressed a postive attude on the subject of friends with benefits, but like myself has no experience. We are as interested as anyone else here to read posts.

In my experience, it sort of sucks. It makes friendships awkward... the relationship is changed permanently and going back to being "just friends" doesn't really work out.

Then don't fuck her.

You don't have to screw every girl that makes you horny.

I can't stand a meaningless fuck.

I like it to be a close personal experience.

But just having sex shouldn't mean you own someone or are obligated....but it does mean a level of trust exists.

I agree; I don't try to fuck around. My beliefs have become more important than getting my nut.

 

[Modbert]

Wow. Rules to decieve yourself and your partner with while using her for your own personal gratification.

And you wonder why women have a low opinion of men nowadays.

Since when did women have a high opinion of men, or have reason to? Before we burned them at the stake? Before or after we gave them the right to vote?

I'd like to know when women had reason to have a high opinion of men.

 

[Modbert]

We had rules we followed, we had a time limit, and we even have hooked up since. He is still one of my best friends, and I still think he is a great guy.

Ten minutes?

 

[The Infidel]

Flies dont live long enough to give a fuq

 

[Modbert]

Then don't fuck her.

You don't have to screw every girl that makes you horny.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5JALwwaASg]YouTube - Elvis Presley Milton Berle Show 5 Jun 1956: Hound Dog[/ame]

 

[Stainmaster]

Please, you honestly think you can use women and that's not going to effect your children?

Now something new - amazing! I have not posted my thoughts about 'friends with benefits' because I don't have any. Not yet anyway. I respect women, and I am engaged to a feminist. She has expressed a postive attude on the subject of friends with benefits, but like myself has no experience. We are as interested as anyone else here to read posts.

In the past I have posted sexual questions, and ended up being blamed for the content of the thread as prudes blew things out of perspective. This time place your blame on the writer of the article, Joseph Mathews.

Setting up barriers like you have laid out only comes across as cold and calculated.

I think you should stop worrying about becoming too close to someone.

Try being more honest with them instead of more distant.

It would appear that you are talking to me, but your text has nothing to do with my post or this thread.

Am I getting the impression that "friends with benefits" is an advantage for males, and a disadvantage for females? You must be joking!

 

[william the wie]

This is the silliest idea I have seen on the web:

A) Even if you are 5', ugly and fat some gal will go into heat over you so FWB doesn't work women chase men that are seen as taken. I weigh 260 and I am 57 but I still get episodes of being chased probably because my 32 year marriage is still going strong. This is a very common problem because women out number men by a huge margin.

B) What's the point? Bi-girls, wannabe sugarbabies, single women taking care of a disabled mom, dad or child and many others are a dime a dozen. So if you want to have steady sex with low or no commitment and no long set of rules there are plenty of women out there and you don't have to look that hard to find them. You can set up your own low rent harem if that appeals to you so why go to all of this bother?

 

[mudwhistle]

Wow. Rules to decieve yourself and your partner with while using her for your own personal gratification.

And you wonder why women have a low opinion of men nowadays.

Since when did women have a high opinion of men, or have reason to? Before we burned them at the stake? Before or after we gave them the right to vote?

I'd like to know when women had reason to have a high opinion of men.

Excuse me???

We did what????

I don't remember doing any of those things and I'm not taking the blame for them.

We men are not attached at the hip. We are individuals answerable to our own individual conscience.

 

[mudwhistle]

Now something new - amazing! I have not posted my thoughts about 'friends with benefits' because I don't have any. Not yet anyway. I respect women, and I am engaged to a feminist. She has expressed a postive attude on the subject of friends with benefits, but like myself has no experience. We are as interested as anyone else here to read posts.

In the past I have posted sexual questions, and ended up being blamed for the content of the thread as prudes blew things out of perspective. This time place your blame on the writer of the article, Joseph Mathews.

Setting up barriers like you have laid out only comes across as cold and calculated.

I think you should stop worrying about becoming too close to someone.

Try being more honest with them instead of more distant.

It would appear that you are talking to me, but your text has nothing to do with my post or this thread.

Am I getting the impression that "friends with benefits" is an advantage for males, and a disadvantage for females? You must be joking!

Rule number 8 pretty much spells it out. If you feel you have to hide what you did then of course you're not being honest. It sounds more like something a married man does, not someone who's single.

Sure if you love sleeping around don't leave any evidence laying around your pussy-palace.

8. Hide all evidence of your arrangement.

Throw out all condom wrappers (although you should no matter what), change your sheets, and don't get any hickeys, bruises, bites, or scratches if you expect to date anyone else any time soon.

 

[strollingbones]

why is this thread in arts and crafts????


put a fucking shirt on asshole.

 

[dilloduck]

The only reason the OP is even necessary is that some women claim that they can pull off FWB but in reality few can do it without falling in love and wanting the committment. They're wired that way.

 

[editec]

Occasionally, you'll meet a woman you have a lot of chemistry with, but for some reason, you don't want to commit to her. So you remain friends with the woman, while still being intimate with each other.

It can become a problem though, if the woman is insistent upon turning it into more than that. You don't want to be pulled into a relationship. To prevent this, you need to lay some ground rules.

Here are some tips for keeping the "Friends With Benefits" alive and well, for as long as possible.

1. No spending the night.

Letting her spend the night, or spending the night at her place sends the wrong message! It communicates a desire to settle down. If you can, keep the encounters at her place, and then leave. It's much nicer than kicking her out of your place.

2. Keep cuddling to a minimum!

Doing a lot of intimate stuff is going to create an emotional desire for more. Avoid this! You want to keep things physical rather than emotional. Fifteen minutes of cuddling is the max I would recommend. But displays of affection is generally discouraged.

3. Do not enter into a "Friends With Benefits" arrangement while drunk.

There's a difference between a one-night stand and a friend with benefits. But entering either drunk is not wise. God forbid there's a beer-goggles situation. You don't want to go to bed with a supermodel and wake up with a dog, do you? Besides, don't you want to be sober enough to remember all the marvelous fun you had the night before?

4. No leave-behinds!

Do not allow the girl to leave any of her stuff at your place! No toothbrushes, no clothes - nothing! There should be no ties at all. Believe me, women WILL try and do this if they're over enough times, just for "convenience." But it's really a doorway into moving more and more things in, until she's effectively attached herself to you.

5. Don't discuss anything real.

Remember, we're trying to avoid intimacy here, and nothing creates intimacy like talking about important things. No family history, no favorite colors, no goals, no personal triumphs or tragedies. If you want to keep it a friends with benefits situation, you have to stay light: movies, bands, and favorite brands of booze.

6. Pet names aren't allowed.

No sweetie, honey, schmoopie allowed. Once you start with the nick names, a sense of ownership is implied. Don't even call her "babe." Keep it to her name only, because once you start with the terms of endearment, she's going to get the wrong idea.

7. No dinners, no movies, no "quality time" of any sort.

If she insists on going out at all, meet her at a bar for drinks no earlier than ten o'clock at night. The hour between nine and ten is the gray zone between when a real date starts and when it's just a hook-up. Going out late means you don't have to go through the effort of buying her dinner and talking, you just want to get to the good stuff.

8. Hide all evidence of your arrangement.

Throw out all condom wrappers (although you should no matter what), change your sheets, and don't get any hickeys, bruises, bites, or scratches if you expect to date anyone else any time soon.

9. Always play it safe!

You do not want a pregnancy. So always, always, ALWAYS use condoms and birth control when playing with your friend with benefits!

And more importantly, be sure to properly dispose of the condoms after you're done! Flush 'em down that toilet to make sure there's no possibility of "leakage."

10. Pee with the door closed.

Even if you are using each other for cheap thrills, doesn't mean you should act indecent.

These rules probably sound harsh, but if it's too much, then having a friend with benefits is probably not for you. Many people can get it on and not feel any attachment. Most can't though, and it's a rough game that not everyone can play. Just figure out what you are willing to do and go from there.

Joseph Matthews has been instructing men how to meet women since 2004, and is widely known as an authority in the subject of confidence building and dating advice. If you want to discover more about how to meet women, check out his free newsletter.

10 Rules For Being "Friends With Benefits"

I thought that's what roofies and whores were for.

How silly to think that one can have a long term sexual relationship with another person that won't end up with emotional entanglements.

I think we boomers tried this kind of relationship and rejected this theory during the sexual revolution.

I don't know a single person whose ever had a relationship like this that lasted or didn't become emotionally difficult.

Zipless fucks, yes, those seem to work, but long term sexual relationships that are kept at an arm's length emotional relationsip?

I'd say those are fairly rare events.

 

[Anguille]

Stain, I think you are confusing the friends with benefits type relationship with the inflatable doll with benefits relationship.

 

[dilloduck]

Occasionally, you'll meet a woman you have a lot of chemistry with, but for some reason, you don't want to commit to her. So you remain friends with the woman, while still being intimate with each other.

It can become a problem though, if the woman is insistent upon turning it into more than that. You don't want to be pulled into a relationship. To prevent this, you need to lay some ground rules.

Here are some tips for keeping the "Friends With Benefits" alive and well, for as long as possible.

1. No spending the night.

Letting her spend the night, or spending the night at her place sends the wrong message! It communicates a desire to settle down. If you can, keep the encounters at her place, and then leave. It's much nicer than kicking her out of your place.

2. Keep cuddling to a minimum!

Doing a lot of intimate stuff is going to create an emotional desire for more. Avoid this! You want to keep things physical rather than emotional. Fifteen minutes of cuddling is the max I would recommend. But displays of affection is generally discouraged.

3. Do not enter into a "Friends With Benefits" arrangement while drunk.

There's a difference between a one-night stand and a friend with benefits. But entering either drunk is not wise. God forbid there's a beer-goggles situation. You don't want to go to bed with a supermodel and wake up with a dog, do you? Besides, don't you want to be sober enough to remember all the marvelous fun you had the night before?

4. No leave-behinds!

Do not allow the girl to leave any of her stuff at your place! No toothbrushes, no clothes - nothing! There should be no ties at all. Believe me, women WILL try and do this if they're over enough times, just for "convenience." But it's really a doorway into moving more and more things in, until she's effectively attached herself to you.

5. Don't discuss anything real.

Remember, we're trying to avoid intimacy here, and nothing creates intimacy like talking about important things. No family history, no favorite colors, no goals, no personal triumphs or tragedies. If you want to keep it a friends with benefits situation, you have to stay light: movies, bands, and favorite brands of booze.

6. Pet names aren't allowed.

No sweetie, honey, schmoopie allowed. Once you start with the nick names, a sense of ownership is implied. Don't even call her "babe." Keep it to her name only, because once you start with the terms of endearment, she's going to get the wrong idea.

7. No dinners, no movies, no "quality time" of any sort.

If she insists on going out at all, meet her at a bar for drinks no earlier than ten o'clock at night. The hour between nine and ten is the gray zone between when a real date starts and when it's just a hook-up. Going out late means you don't have to go through the effort of buying her dinner and talking, you just want to get to the good stuff.

8. Hide all evidence of your arrangement.

Throw out all condom wrappers (although you should no matter what), change your sheets, and don't get any hickeys, bruises, bites, or scratches if you expect to date anyone else any time soon.

9. Always play it safe!

You do not want a pregnancy. So always, always, ALWAYS use condoms and birth control when playing with your friend with benefits!

And more importantly, be sure to properly dispose of the condoms after you're done! Flush 'em down that toilet to make sure there's no possibility of "leakage."

10. Pee with the door closed.

Even if you are using each other for cheap thrills, doesn't mean you should act indecent.

These rules probably sound harsh, but if it's too much, then having a friend with benefits is probably not for you. Many people can get it on and not feel any attachment. Most can't though, and it's a rough game that not everyone can play. Just figure out what you are willing to do and go from there.

Joseph Matthews has been instructing men how to meet women since 2004, and is widely known as an authority in the subject of confidence building and dating advice. If you want to discover more about how to meet women, check out his free newsletter.

10 Rules For Being "Friends With Benefits"

I thought that's what roofies and whores were for.

How silly to think that one can have a long term sexual relationship with another person that won't end up with emotional entanglements.

I think we boomers tried this kind of relationship and rejected this theory during the sexual revolution.

I don't know a single person whose ever had a relationship like this that lasted or didn't become emotionally difficult.

Zipless fucks, yes, those seem to work, but long term sexual relationships that are kept at an arm's length emotional relationsip?

I'd say those are fairly rare events.

Think of it as a modern day zipless fuck with women who are a bit more capable of enjoying it without the commitment. If women wanna enjoy what men have, by all means let em try.

 

[Si modo]

"Arts and Crafts"




Maybe someone can knit a shirt for Stain?