Grandma goes to court

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Againsheila, Mar 9, 2009.

  1. Againsheila

    Againsheila Gold Member

    Nov 1, 2008
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    Federal Way WA
    Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't
    prepared for the answer. . . . . .
    In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first
    witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her
    and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do
    know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and
    frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on
    your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their
    backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to
    realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper
    pusher. Yes, I know you.'

    The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
    the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

    She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
    youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He
    can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is
    one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his
    wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know

    The defense attorney nearly died.

    The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very
    quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me,
    I'll send you both to the electric chair.
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