> > > > An office manager at Walmart was given the task of hiring an > > individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes > > he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four > > in and ask > > them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get > > the job. > > > > The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the > > interviewer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?" > > > > Acknowledging the first man on his right, the man replied, "A > > THOUGHT". It just pops into your head. There's no warning that it's > > on the way; it's just there. A thought is the fastest thing I know > > of." > > > > "That's very good!" replied the interviewer. "And now you sir?" he > > asked the second man. > > > > "Hmm.... let me see. A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know > > that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of." > > > > "Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an eye, that's a > > very popular cliche for speed." > > > > He then turned to the third man who was contemplating his reply. > > > > "Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the > > wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out > > across the pasture the light in the barn comes on in less than an > > instant. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of." > > > > The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought > > he had found his man. "It's hard to beat the speed of light" he said. > > > > Turning to Bubba, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the > > same question. > > > > Old Bubba replied, "After hearing the three previous answers, It's > > obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA." > > > > "WHAT!?" said the interviewer, stunned by the response. > > > > "Oh I can explain." said Old Bubba. "You see the other day I wasn't > > feeling so good and I ran for the bathroom. But, before I could > > THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already shit in my pants.