Do you think it's okay..........

[GotZoom]

I can't give an answer to this without more info.

Porn. Like anything else, there are different types of "Adult" videos.

Are we talking about XXX, 12 people having an orgy, some guy brings in a german shepherd to join the party type porn?

Or are we talking about two people, living out fantasies, sex in the elevator and CEO's office when he isn't around porn?

I don't see anything healthy or entertaining about the first example. I don't care if both people are all for watching something like that, I just don't see how that would help or excite anybody.

Now..the second one; if both people are interested in watching that - they feel it might help them or just want to watch it to be entertained with a movie one night, then why not.

 

[Joz]

I say "yes" unless it's at an obsessive amount, then I'd say you're both addicted!

Seriously, nothing wrong with adding a little spice to things.

You mean to tell me you can't find some other way to "spice things up" than to watch someone else roll around???

....I don't know how many studies have shown that men are more arosed by visual images than women. At the same time, 'romantic novels' can get many a lady in the mood.....

I'm not saying that a man should never look at a picture of a naked woman, nor a woman do a little reading. What I'm afraid of is that the reading or viewing becomes a substitute for the real thing. There is nothing more enjoyable than your partner finding you desirable and vise versa. And yes, after many years of being together sex, as with life, can get quite routine. A relationship takes constant work. Good marriages, good sex, rarely 'just happens'. And it is the rare couple who is interested in doing the work that makes this happen.

 

[dmp]

I don't understand why the conflict. If two people enjoy that. It's their business. If not, then no problem either.

Y'all are thinking way too much. There's nothing supernatural about it. *sigh*

You missed the point of the question.

The question is: Is a couple HURTING their love-life by watching porn - even together? Is that selling short what God intended a sexual relationship to be?



If you aren't a believer you may not understand, however.

 

[dmp]

What if a couple made their OWN porn and watched it on tv while they were doin' it?

 

[Joz]

What if a couple made their OWN porn and watched it on tv while they were doin' it?

I think that would be better. Or how about the ol' mirror over the bed.
I am still having trouble understanding why the actual sex act, gettin' sweaty with someone you love, can't be a good time???

 

[dmp]

I think that would be better. Or how about the ol' mirror over the bed.
I am still having trouble understanding why the actual sex act, gettin' sweaty with someone you love, can't be a good time???

It CAN be a GREAT Time...I think watching OTHERS have sex can stimulate people into feeling naughty or more 'in the mood' or whatever...can add excitement I suppose.

 

[jillian]

I think that would be better. Or how about the ol' mirror over the bed.
I am still having trouble understanding why the actual sex act, gettin' sweaty with someone you love, can't be a good time???

Who says it can't be a great time? One has nothing to do with the other.

 

[jillian]

You missed the point of the question.

The question is: Is a couple HURTING their love-life by watching porn - even together? Is that selling short what God intended a sexual relationship to be?



If you aren't a believer you may not understand, however.

I'm a believer, but not in what you believe. But it's cool. I understood (and answered) the question. As I said, I just don't think it has to be that complicated.

Basically, I second what GotZoom said.

 

[Joz]

Who says it can't be a great time? One has nothing to do with the other.

Sometimes my words don't coincide with my tho'ts. What I meant was, why can't this be enough? Why does involving "others" need to be introduced into the act? There's dating, & role playing & toys & places & dressing up that can be used without resorting to porn.

 

[dilloduck]

Sometimes my words don't coincide with my tho'ts. What I meant was, why can't this be enough? Why does involving "others" need to be introduced into the act? There's dating, & role playing & toys & places & dressing up that can be used without resorting to porn.

I don't think it's a question of need as much it is a question of option. No one is for making it mandatory.

 

[jillian]

Sometimes my words don't coincide with my tho'ts. What I meant was, why can't this be enough? Why does involving "others" need to be introduced into the act? There's dating, & role playing & toys & places & dressing up that can be used without resorting to porn.

What he (Dillo) said ^^^^^^^^^^^^

It's not about "resorting". It's about what two consenting adults might find fun. Nothing more, nothing less. If they don't think it's fun, then its not an issue. If they do think it's fun, then it's not an issue.

 

[manu1959]

are you all telling me that when having sex with your wife husband or whatever you have never ever had a thought of another person......mental porn

live and let live folks.....what difference does it make wht other poelple do if it has zero effect on you

 

[Annie]

are you all telling me that when having sex with your wife husband or whatever you have never ever had a thought of another person......mental porn

live and let live folks.....what difference does it make wht other poelple do if it has zero effect on you

What? I would never fantasize, what is that anywho?

 

[dmp]

What he (Dillo) said ^^^^^^^^^^^^

It's not about "resorting". It's about what two consenting adults might find fun. Nothing more, nothing less. If they don't think it's fun, then its not an issue. If they do think it's fun, then it's not an issue.

you KEEP missing the point, brother.

It's not about 'should' or 'could' or 'can'...

It's about 'is it HURTFUL to a relationship.

(sigh)

 

[dilloduck]

you KEEP missing the point, brother.

It's not about 'should' or 'could' or 'can'...

It's about 'is it HURTFUL to a relationship.

(sigh)

Not anymore than a .44 mag in your top drawer.

 

[jillian]

you KEEP missing the point, brother.

It's not about 'should' or 'could' or 'can'...

It's about 'is it HURTFUL to a relationship.

(sigh)

I keep answering you, girlfriend.

If they're into it, it's fine and not hurtful.

If they're not...they won't use it and it ain't no thang.

Serious question, why do you think it's such a big deal either way?

 

[dmp]

I keep answering you, girlfriend.

If they're into it, it's fine and not hurtful.

If they're not...they won't use it and it ain't no thang.

Serious question, why do you think it's such a big deal either way?

It's clear you have a very narrow view on things.

Does Smoking hurt people? Years ago ppl had the same reaction as you do now, with this. "Sure! If they're into it, cool!"

What you're having trouble coming to grips with is this: Often things we may THINK are harmless can come back to bite us in the arse.

think BIGGER than yourself.

 

[dilloduck]

It's clear you have a very narrow view on things.

Does Smoking hurt people? Years ago ppl had the same reaction as you do now, with this. "Sure! If they're into it, cool!"

What you're having trouble coming to grips with is this: Often things we may THINK are harmless can come back to bite us in the arse.

think BIGGER than yourself.

Whoa dude----you're pushing the newbie a little hard aren't ya?

 

[Annie]

Whoa dude----you're pushing the newbie a little hard aren't ya?

Nearly 500 posts doesn't qualify for 'newbie' status, ya think?

 

[manu1959]

you KEEP missing the point, brother.

It's not about 'should' or 'could' or 'can'...

It's about 'is it HURTFUL to a relationship.

(sigh)

isn't up to the couple to decide what is hurtful?