Oh, mudwhistle, that explains a lot. My husband passed away with advanced dementia 6 years ago June 13. I wasn't very patient, and I have a sad when I think about how I expected him to be like he always had been. At its worst time the sherriffs in 3 counties told me to not let him go to there counties ever again. I had to wear jeans to bed at night with 3 sets of keys to keep him from driving himself on a joyride to anywhere... He had the kind of dementia that causes the victims to be known as "travellers." Trust me, words didn't work, but If I could relive the last year of his life, I'd ask God every day to remind me of what a wonderful person he was when he was well, and I'd remind him to remember all the good things he did for familly, friends, and community every waking minute of his life when his brain worked well. They don't know what they're doing, and they can't control themselves in every way imaginable. I've had 6 years to think about it. We were married for 44 years, ending with his succumbing to his horrible disease. 40 of those years, he was the kindest, most wonderful human beings ever to walk this planet. Today, if I have a down day, I remember the jokes he told every day. I love those 40 years of joy with gratitude that was lucky to have a happiness planner like him. Those 4 miserabler years, I just hope you get through it better than I did. Bless you sir, It's a bad time for both of you. Hang in there.