Grief Can Actually Feel Less Devastating If You Exercise
A few years ago, my fiance died the day before our wedding. The day of the wedding, I had to deal with 200 out of town visitors in town for a wedding that didn't happen. The next few months passed in a bit of a daze until I realized, one day, I had gained a lot of weight. Grief tends to do that to you. You get so caught up in how you feel and what you've lost, you don't really take notice of anything else going on, and you certainly don't exercise. The problem is, when you're still in one of the stages of grief (I think I'd hit denial by then), it's really difficult to muster up any energy to do anything about it. But, some little voice in my head kept telling me I had to find the energy from somewhere and little by little I did. Exercise was finally the first thing I started to do to try to work my way through the stages of grief.
I was living in Ohio at the time and the weather had just started to turn a little warmer. I didn't want to join a gym to exercise as I certainly didn't feel like being around a lot of people. So, I started to walk around my neighborhood. When I first started out, fifteen minutes of slow walking was about all I could be bothered to do. Not a lot, and it certainly wasn't going to make me lose tons of weight but, with the fresh air and endorphins that kick in when you exercise, after a week I noticed my mood was lighter. After two weeks, I had increased my exercise time until I was walking 30 minutes about four times a week. My grief was still apparent but I did notice it didn't feel quite so sharp.
About a month into my new exercise program, my legs and arms were starting to tone up. At this point I also changed the food I was eating. I cut down on portions and tried to eat more fruit and vegetables and less simple carbohydrates. With the exercise and healthier foods, my mood felt much lighter and I was less depressed than before. Sure, I was still grieving (you don't get over your fiance' s death that quickly!), but the grief was more in the back of my mind than at the front, where it had been before. Sometimes, a few hours went by before I even thought about my fiance a huge improvement over the first few months of grieving where I thought about him almost every minute of every day.