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- Feb 16, 2016
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Congress Proposes New Law Banning Anyone From Reading
babylonbee.com
19 Dec 2024 I
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The United States Congress introduced bold legislation this week that, if passed, would ban reading any future spending bills until after they become law.
"We needed to pass a new budget to give ourselves raises and pay off lobbyists and bankrupt the country," said House Representative Kay Granger, Chair of the House Appropriations Committee. "But people keep reading the bill and ruining everything."
"Reading is a grave threat to democracy," she added.
House Speaker Mike Johnson, who previously said reading is fundamental, plans to bring the Readers Are Dweebs Bill to the house floor soon. "Look, I just need to pass this budget, then I can go home for Christmas and sit on the couch and eat ham while I watch my kids open presents," he said. "If banning reading is the way to do it, then so be it. I mean, we're certainly not going to draft a reasonable budget. That would be ridiculous."
Though polling suggests the American people would support a government budget that decreased the national debt, Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer vehemently opposed the idea. "Chucky's gotta get paid, son," he told Fox News.
At publishing time, Representative Thomas Massie had attached a rider to the Readers Are Dweebs Bill, which banned writing spending bills.
Commentary:
Like San Fran Nan has told us, we have to pass it before we can see what's in in.
Those guys at The Babylon Bee get closer to the truth with every article!
Babylon Bee printing the Hard News Truth, again.
I'm not surprised that Schumer and Jefferies tried to get away with their scheme under the guise of bipartisanship.
They've used this ploy too many times before.
Trump stopped them in mid stride and as of January 3rd the the new Congress takes over....
Spending Bill Until It's Passed
Congress Proposes New Law Banning Anyone From Reading Spending Bill Until It's Passed
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The United States Congress introduced bold legislation this week that, if passed, would ban reading any future spending bills until after they become law.
babylonbee.com
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The United States Congress introduced bold legislation this week that, if passed, would ban reading any future spending bills until after they become law.
"We needed to pass a new budget to give ourselves raises and pay off lobbyists and bankrupt the country," said House Representative Kay Granger, Chair of the House Appropriations Committee. "But people keep reading the bill and ruining everything."
"Reading is a grave threat to democracy," she added.
House Speaker Mike Johnson, who previously said reading is fundamental, plans to bring the Readers Are Dweebs Bill to the house floor soon. "Look, I just need to pass this budget, then I can go home for Christmas and sit on the couch and eat ham while I watch my kids open presents," he said. "If banning reading is the way to do it, then so be it. I mean, we're certainly not going to draft a reasonable budget. That would be ridiculous."
Though polling suggests the American people would support a government budget that decreased the national debt, Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer vehemently opposed the idea. "Chucky's gotta get paid, son," he told Fox News.
At publishing time, Representative Thomas Massie had attached a rider to the Readers Are Dweebs Bill, which banned writing spending bills.
Commentary:
Like San Fran Nan has told us, we have to pass it before we can see what's in in.
Those guys at The Babylon Bee get closer to the truth with every article!
Babylon Bee printing the Hard News Truth, again.
I'm not surprised that Schumer and Jefferies tried to get away with their scheme under the guise of bipartisanship.
They've used this ploy too many times before.
Trump stopped them in mid stride and as of January 3rd the the new Congress takes over....
