What Republicans Believe

Discussion in 'Humor' started by posternutbag, Jul 14, 2004.

  1. posternutbag
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    posternutbag Guest

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    Things you have to believe to be a Republican today:
    >
    > Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when
    > Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did
    > business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't
    > find Bin Laden" diversion.
    >
    > Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist,
    > but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of
    > international harmony.
    >
    > The United States should get out of the United Nations, and
    > our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions
    > against Iraq.
    >
    > A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body,
    > but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting
    > all mankind without regulation.
    >
    > Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and
    > Hillary Clinton.
    >
    > The best way to improve military morale is to praise the
    > troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and
    > combat pay.
    >
    > If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have
    > sex.
    >
    > A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time
    > allies, then demand their cooperation and money.
    >
    > Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy.
    > Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.
    >
    > HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the
    > public at heart.
    >
    > A president lying about an extramarital affair is an
    > impeachable offense.
    >
    > A president lying to enlist support for a war in which
    > thousands die is solid defense policy.
    >
    > Government should limit itself to the powers named in the
    > Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and
    > censoring the Internet.
    >
    > The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle
    > trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our
    > business.
    >
    > Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless
    > you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness, and
    > you need our prayers for your recovery.
    >
    > You support states' rights, which means Attorney General
    > John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives
    > they have the right to adopt.
    >
    > What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national
    > interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant
     
  2. freeandfun1
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    freeandfun1 VIP Member

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    grow up and be a man (I assume if you are a woman you are a dike, so if the shoe fits....). quit blabbing and either engage in serious and intellectually honest debate or get the fuck outta here.
     
  3. Yurt
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    Yurt Gold Member

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    I am too tired to reply to everything said. It is pretty much nonsense.

    One thing though, Democrats also believe Saddam is a bad guy, there are so many more fallacies in this post...
     
  4. DKSuddeth
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    DKSuddeth Senior Member

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    I'm guessing that this should be in humor, so there it goes.
     
  5. nycflasher
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    nycflasher Active Member

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    :eek: :laugh:
     
  6. posternutbag
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    posternutbag Guest

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    What does what Democrats believe have to do with what Republicans believe? Hmm, nothing. Republicans and Democrats are free to believe anything they want independant of one another, so if a Republican belief is messed up, well, its still messed up no matter what the Democrats believe!

    So you think Hussein was a bad guy when Reagan was arming him? You're OK with Reagan giving arms to a bad guy?
     
  7. OCA
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    OCA Senior Member

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    Absolutely, in the 80's we bought ourselves a dog named Hussein, we fed him good, kept him warm in the winter and took him for long walks but somewhere along the way he became rabid and bit his master's hand, so we took his ass out in the field and put a load of #4 buckshot in him and clipped him. This is what you do with rabid dogs.
     
  8. Avatar4321
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    Avatar4321 Diamond Member Gold Supporting Member

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    Nice analogy.
     
  9. Avatar4321
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    Avatar4321 Diamond Member Gold Supporting Member

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    Still not exactly sure what he thought this had to do with the War on terror. Or how exactly posting ignorant statements actually creates a strong argument.
     
  10. posternutbag
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    posternutbag Guest

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    That's a pretty silly analogy. You forgot to mention that you were aware your dog named Hussein was gassing his own people while you "fed him good, kept him warm in the winter and took him for long walks..." And you used a run-on sentence.
     

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