Donald “The Don” Trump has a visitor in the Oval Office. Trump: We have known each other many years, but this is the first time you've come to me for counsel or for help. But let's be frank here. You never wanted my friendship. And you feared to be in my debt. Turkey: Gobble, gobble Trump: I understand. You found paradise in America. You had a good life. So you didn't need a friend like me. Now you come and say "Trump, give me justice." But you don't ask with respect. You don't offer friendship. You don't even think to call me "Mr. President." Turkey: Gobble, gobble Trump: What have I ever done to make you treat me so disrespectfully? If you'd come to me in friendship, this scum who carried an ax would be suffering this very day. And if by some chance an honest bird like yourself made enemies they would become my enemies. And then, they would fear you. Turkey: Gobble, gobble Trump: Good. Someday, and that day may never come, I will call upon you to do a service for me. But until that day, consider this justice a gift for Thanksgiving Day.