Topless Biker Babes and Touchy Tire Gauges

Discussion in 'Congress' started by The BKP, Aug 6, 2008.

  1. The BKP
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    The BKP Grand Inquistor

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    The theme of the week on the campaign trail is energy. Both Senators McCain and Obama are crisscrossing the nation, taking potshots at each other even as they tout their respective energy plans.

    As part of the week’s itinerary, Senator McCain put in a stop at the legendary Sturgis Motorcycle Rally in South Dakota.

    Playing on the imagery and association between the independent American spirit and the motorcycle, McCain was warmly received with the roar of thousands of devout Harley riders and their thunderous engines celebrating the Rally’s 68th anniversary at the Buffalo Chip Campgrounds.

    Cliff Leach, a U.S. National Guard veteran, introduced McCain with a biker's view of an American utopia. "We believe in a beautiful America. A land of beautiful roads, a land of beautiful bikes, ice-cold beers and a land of beautiful women," Leach said. "And that's the best hoo-ah a man can get."

    Caught up in the moment, McCain suggested his wife, Cindy, should compete in the Rally’s famous “Miss Buffalo Chip” beauty contest.

    "I told her with a little luck, she could be the only woman ever to serve as both the first lady and Miss Buffalo Chip," McCain quipped.

    Apparently the Senator and his staff were unaware of the longstanding tradition of contestants wearing barely-there bikinis, with the finalists and winners invariably going topless in order to seize the coveted title.

    Then again, perhaps there’s a bit more of a racy side to the McCains we weren’t quite aware of. Hmmmmm……

    Playing to the crowd, McCain took the opportunity to needle Senator Obama over his recent gravitas-focused world tour. “As you may know, not long ago a couple hundred thousand Berliners made a lot of noise for my opponent. I'll take the roar of 50,000 Harleys any day," McCain said, referring to the Democrat's recent visit to the German capital.

    Continuing to hammer Senator Obama over his energy plan, McCain insisted, “We’re not going to pay $4 dollars a gallon for gas (when I am president) because we are going to drill offshore and we are going to drill now. We are going to drill here and we are going to drill now. My opponent doesn’t want to drill, he doesn’t want nuclear power. He wants to inflate your tires.”

    This in spite of Obama’s recent statements that he was willing to accept limited expanded drilling as part of a comprehensive bipartisan energy package.

    In contrast to McCain’s lighthearted demeanor, it appears that Republican attacks on his energy plan have left Senator Obama a tad irritable.

    Speaking at a town hall meeting in Berea, Ohio, Obama said of Republicans, “I don't understand it! They’re going around, they're sending like little tire gauges, making fun of this idea as if this is 'Barack Obama's energy plan.'”

    Further demonstrating that Republican mockery of his plan had indeed gotten under his skin, Obama continued, "Now two points, one, they know they're lying about what my energy plan is, but the other thing is they're making fun of a step that every expert says would absolutely reduce our oil consumption by 3 to 4 percent.”

    Finally, ratcheting up the rhetorical heat, the Senator concluded, “It’s like these guys take pride in being ignorant.”

    Ouch; so much for reaching across the political aisle and extending the hand of bipartisanship and compromise. He’s sure to win over hordes of Republicans with comments like that.

    In all fairness to Senator Obama, the Republicans have raked him over the coals on what was a response to an individual’s query on what average citizens could do to address the energy crisis.

    However, what the Republicans have effectively done is created the impression that Senator Obama’s energy plan is naively simplistic.

    Granted, one would expect to find such car maintenance and mileage tips offered by a reporter on the local 11 o’clock news and not a presidential candidate. Nonetheless, they are still valid ways for individuals to take responsibility for their energy use and play a personal role in confronting the energy crisis.

    Unfortunately for the Obama camp, though, the Senator’s repeated revisiting of the incident displays that the Republicans are finally hitting their stride and have created an irritating itch that he just can’t seem to scratch.

    Lost in the distant exchange of pithy barbs and sophomoric sniping is any serious debate over America’s energy future and the candidate’s respective proposals. Perhaps if Senator Obama honored his original acceptance of McCain’s challenge to hold a cross-country town hall tour, this and other pressing issues might actually receive the thorough and in-depth discussion they so earnestly deserve.

    Power to the people, faithful readers! Oil, natural gas, coal, wind, solar and nuclear – all are welcome and needed. Stay tuned for further updates as events warrant and Miss Buffalo Chip is crowned in all her glory!

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