"The secretary of the Army extends his deepest sympathy to you ——”

[Procrustes Stretched]

"The secretary of the Army extends his deepest sympathy to you ——”

The Messenger

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/10/movies/awardsseason/10hold.html?_r=1

netflix

 

[Toome]

I presented a medal to a widow as part of a military funeral. The funeral detail OIC (officer in charge) was coaching me on how to do it. He said to look in her direction but slightly over her head. I thought that was unusual advice, and I wanted to be more sincere. So when the time came, I made the mistake of looking directly into the widow's eyes. She looked directly back at me as if searching for something; answers on what was going to happen to her; why this happened; I thought I was going to lose it. So I regained my composure immediately and looked slightly over her head as I mechanically said the words, "this medal is presented on behalf of the nation as a token of appreciation for your loved ones service" (the words are very similar to how the folded flag is presented).

So I can understand the Woody Harrelson character, especially if he's portraying someone who does this as a regular job. I've seen many things in my lifetime and done many things, but that presenting that medal to the widow at the funeral rates as one of the toughest things I ever had to do.

I'm not so sure I would go see this movie. Probably would hit home.

I'm not ready for a movie to hit home.

 

[Procrustes Stretched]

I presented a medal to a widow as part of a military funeral. The funeral detail OIC (officer in charge) was coaching me on how to do it. He said to look in her direction but slightly over her head. I thought that was unusual advice, and I wanted to be more sincere. So when the time came, I made the mistake of looking directly into the widow's eyes. She looked directly back at me as if searching for something; answers on what was going to happen to her; why this happened; I thought I was going to lose it. So I regained my composure immediately and looked slightly over her head as I mechanically said the words, "this medal is presented on behalf of the nation as a token of appreciation for your loved ones service" (the words are very similar to how the folded flag is presented).

So I can understand the Woody Harrelson character, especially if he's portraying someone who does this as a regular job. I've seen many things in my lifetime and done many things, but that presenting that medal to the widow at the funeral rates as one of the toughest things I ever had to do.

I'm not so sure I would go see this movie. Probably would hit home.

I'm not ready for a movie to hit home.

In an old job, I had to enter a private home after the medical examiner had been there, and I had to introduce myself as representing the particular Funeral Home. I was there to take away a loved one.

I had to put them on a stretcher, cover them, and wheel them out of their beloved family home for the last time, often with family members insisting on being present and watching.

Hit home? What hits home is watching the grief and loss people experience from a distance yet up close -- on camera. It is a different experience to see it from outside. Knowing how it feels is one thing, but I would think seeing it done from outside gives it a whole new perspective.