The priest's cock

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Bootneck, Jun 7, 2009.

  1. Bootneck
    Offline

    Bootneck Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    3,576
    Thanks Received:
    2,972
    Trophy Points:
    2,050
    Location:
    England
    Ratings:
    +4,172
    The priest in a small Irish village loved his chickens that he kept in the coop behind the church. One Sunday morning before mass, he went to feed the birds and discovered that the cock was missing. He knew about the cock fights in the village, so he decided to question his parishioners in church. During mass, he asked his congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?" All the men stood up. "No, no, that wasn't what I meant. Has any body seen a cock?" All the women stood up. "No, no, that wasn't what I meant either. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?"....Half the women stood up. "No, no, no, that wasn't what I meant. What I really, really mean is, has anybody seen MY cock?" Sixteen altar boys, two priests and a nun stood up.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 9
  2. DamnYankee
    Offline

    DamnYankee No Neg Policy

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2009
    Messages:
    4,516
    Thanks Received:
    441
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Ratings:
    +441
    :happy-1:
     
  3. Dis
    Online

    Dis Guest

    Ratings:
    +0
    Thus, Yukon is born...:eusa_whistle:
     
  4. Bootneck
    Offline

    Bootneck Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    3,576
    Thanks Received:
    2,972
    Trophy Points:
    2,050
    Location:
    England
    Ratings:
    +4,172
    Yes. Glad you spotted that. I forgot to add his name. :razz:
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 2
  5. Big Black Dog
    Offline

    Big Black Dog Gold Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    May 20, 2009
    Messages:
    22,912
    Thanks Received:
    5,108
    Trophy Points:
    260
    Ratings:
    +5,710
    Bootneck - Careful there... I'm pretty sensitive to jokes about chickens!:lol:
     
  6. Bootneck
    Offline

    Bootneck Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    3,576
    Thanks Received:
    2,972
    Trophy Points:
    2,050
    Location:
    England
    Ratings:
    +4,172
    Really? Not still pondering on who came first. The chicken or the egg, are you?

    Ponder no more, my friend. The secret is out:

    The chicken and the egg are laying in bed after sex. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed.
    The egg mutters "Well I guess that answers that riddle"
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 3
  7. Mr.Fitnah
    Offline

    Mr.Fitnah Dreamcrusher

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2009
    Messages:
    14,480
    Thanks Received:
    2,673
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Paradise.
    Ratings:
    +2,673
    The Marine and The Insurgent....

    A U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist who was badly injured and unconscious.

    On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert, and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened.

    The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent.

    We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road. I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scum bag who got what he deserved.

    And he yelled back that Barack Obama is a lying, good-for-nothing, left wing Commie who isn't even an American.

    So I said that Osama Bin Laden dresses and acts like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian!

    He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well, so does Nancy Pelosi!"

    "And, there we were, in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us."
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 3
  8. Meister
    Offline

    Meister VIP Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2009
    Messages:
    25,900
    Thanks Received:
    8,099
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Conservative part of the Northwest
    Ratings:
    +8,100
    lol
     
  9. Tariq
    Offline

    Tariq BANNED

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2010
    Messages:
    120
    Thanks Received:
    8
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Ratings:
    +8
    It is true that christian men are unable to control sexual urges and thus take liberties with women. Islam does not permit this. We can control ourselves. Please join us.
     
  10. Charles Stucker
    Offline

    Charles Stucker Senior Member

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2009
    Messages:
    2,071
    Thanks Received:
    225
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Ratings:
    +225
    That's the funniest thing I've seen today.
     

Share This Page