~Splinters In Her Crotch~

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Dabs, Sep 28, 2011.

  1. Dabs
    Offline

    Dabs ~Unpredictable~

    Joined:
    May 13, 2011
    Messages:
    8,145
    Thanks Received:
    1,398
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    ~Tennessee~
    Ratings:
    +1,398
    A woman from Los Angeles who was a tree hugger, a liberal Democrat, and an anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland near Colville, WA . There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract.
    She wanted a good view of the natural splendor of her land so she started to climb the big tree. As she neared the top she encountered a spotted owl that attacked her.
    In her haste to escape, the woman slid down the tree to the ground and got many splinters in her crotch. In considerable pain, she hurried to a local ER to see a doctor.
    She told him she was an environmentalist, a democrat, and an anti-hunter and how she came to get all the splinters.
    The doctor listened to her story with great patience and then told her to go wait in the examining room and he would see if he could help her. She sat and waited three hours before the doctor reappeared.
    The angry woman demanded, "What took you so long?" He smiled and then told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the Environmental Protection Agency, the Forest Service, and the Bureau of Land Management before I could remove old-growth timber from a recreational area so close to a waste treatment facility. I'm sorry, but due to Obama Care they turned me down."
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 5
  2. mudwhistle
    Online

    mudwhistle Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2009
    Messages:
    65,280
    Thanks Received:
    11,928
    Trophy Points:
    2,070
    Location:
    Wetwang With Fimber, Yorkshire
    Ratings:
    +26,220
    I got a splinter in my belly when I was 6. I wouldn't let anyone take it out because I didn't want to deflate like a balloon.:razz:
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 3
  3. strollingbones
    Offline

    strollingbones Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2008
    Messages:
    65,653
    Thanks Received:
    15,624
    Trophy Points:
    2,190
    Location:
    chicken farm
    Ratings:
    +31,954
    well mudd that was interesting......
     
  4. mudwhistle
    Online

    mudwhistle Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2009
    Messages:
    65,280
    Thanks Received:
    11,928
    Trophy Points:
    2,070
    Location:
    Wetwang With Fimber, Yorkshire
    Ratings:
    +26,220
    Flashbacks....
     
  5. The Infidel
    Offline

    The Infidel EVIL CONSERVATIVE

    Joined:
    May 19, 2010
    Messages:
    17,252
    Thanks Received:
    3,170
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    AMERITOPIA
    Ratings:
    +3,173

    Thats funnay

    :clap2:
     
  6. Baruch Menachem
    Offline

    Baruch Menachem '

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2008
    Messages:
    14,204
    Thanks Received:
    3,235
    Trophy Points:
    185
    Ratings:
    +3,305
    A recreational area next to a waste treatment facility.......?
     
  7. zzzz
    Offline

    zzzz Just a regular American

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2010
    Messages:
    3,072
    Thanks Received:
    422
    Trophy Points:
    98
    Location:
    Yountsville
    Ratings:
    +429
    [​IMG]
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  8. yidnar
    Offline

    yidnar Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2011
    Messages:
    7,215
    Thanks Received:
    800
    Trophy Points:
    190
    Location:
    Inside your head.
    Ratings:
    +931
    I shit on my pants once ....:(
     
  9. Ernie S.
    Offline

    Ernie S. Platinum Member

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2010
    Messages:
    33,676
    Thanks Received:
    7,721
    Trophy Points:
    1,140
    Location:
    Sweet Home Alabama
    Ratings:
    +12,462
    I used to tell my kids not to play with their belly button or else the knot would come out and they'd be flying around the room backwards.

    Kids and Democrats fall for that stuff.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  10. BakshisMouse
    Offline

    BakshisMouse BANNED

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2011
    Messages:
    702
    Thanks Received:
    69
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Ratings:
    +69
    Well, I certainly wouldn't doubt that.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1

Share This Page