some funnies

Discussion in 'Humor' started by dilloduck, Sep 30, 2004.

  1. dilloduck

    dilloduck Diamond Member

    May 8, 2004
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    Austin, TX
    1. I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said
    "Implants?" She hit me.

    2. How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50
    for Miss America?

    3. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail... but, a true
    friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn... that was fun!"

    4. I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting
    clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up
    in the first place!

    5. When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky

    6. Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell
    the difference.

    7. Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply
    press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?

    8. Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school,! but they
    can in prison?

    9. Wouldn't you know it...! Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT
    cells live forever.

    10. Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten
    Commandments cannot be displayed in a federal building?

    11. Bumper sticker of the year: "If you can read this, thank a
    teacher.... and since it's in English, thank a soldier."
  2. janeeng

    janeeng Guest

    :clap1: :clap1: :thup:

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