‘Rise Up, Patriots!’ Rand Paul Calls To Intubated Patients Lying Unconscious In Hospital ICU

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday.​

​

“To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU, I say join me and your fellow countrymen in rebelling against this despotic medical system!” shouted Paul, a non-board-certified ophthalmologist who represents a state in which more than 1,000 people are hospitalized with Covid, before going on to urge every patient with acute respiratory failure to join arm-in-arm and cast off the tyrannical yoke of fear and propaganda.​

​

“Don’t you see? Those ventilators aren’t there to save you, they’re meant to enslave you. They may look like innocent, artificial breathing devices intended to provide you with you a steady supply of oxygen, but they are the shackles of your oppressor. Rip out your breathing tube and join the resistance!”​

​

At press time, dozens of Covid patients had reportedly died after Paul attempted to reenact the Boston Tea Party by dumping their discolored, hypoxic bodies into the Potomac.​

‘Rise Up, Patriots!’ Rand Paul Calls To Intubated Patients Lying Unconscious In Hospital ICU

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who...

www.theonion.com

 

[Moonglow]

There is a reason why Rand had his ribs broken by his neighbor.

 

[Slade3200]

There is a reason why Rand had his ribs broken by his neighbor.

Its the Onion... Always check the source

 

[theHawk]

Boy, not a good news day for Dems.

Have to resort to fake news satire to distract yourselves?

 

[shockedcanadian]

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday.​

​

“To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU, I say join me and your fellow countrymen in rebelling against this despotic medical system!” shouted Paul, a non-board-certified ophthalmologist who represents a state in which more than 1,000 people are hospitalized with Covid, before going on to urge every patient with acute respiratory failure to join arm-in-arm and cast off the tyrannical yoke of fear and propaganda.​

​

“Don’t you see? Those ventilators aren’t there to save you, they’re meant to enslave you. They may look like innocent, artificial breathing devices intended to provide you with you a steady supply of oxygen, but they are the shackles of your oppressor. Rip out your breathing tube and join the resistance!”​

​

At press time, dozens of Covid patients had reportedly died after Paul attempted to reenact the Boston Tea Party by dumping their discolored, hypoxic bodies into the Potomac.​

‘Rise Up, Patriots!’ Rand Paul Calls To Intubated Patients Lying Unconscious In Hospital ICU

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who...

www.theonion.com

Meh, weak comedy.

I'm unvaccinated. I'm alive and well. Politicize the Wuhan Virus from China at your own risk.

 

[WTF19]

great advice

 

[Slade3200]

Boy, not a good news day for Dems.

Have to resort to fake news satire to distract yourselves?

Not a good day for the World dude... Why do you have to make everything partisan? Doesn't it get old? Both parties have plenty of responsibility for what happened today. To pretend otherwise is just ignorant.

 

[Scottish_Brexiteer_UK]

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday.​

​

“To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU, I say join me and your fellow countrymen in rebelling against this despotic medical system!” shouted Paul, a non-board-certified ophthalmologist who represents a state in which more than 1,000 people are hospitalized with Covid, before going on to urge every patient with acute respiratory failure to join arm-in-arm and cast off the tyrannical yoke of fear and propaganda.​

​

“Don’t you see? Those ventilators aren’t there to save you, they’re meant to enslave you. They may look like innocent, artificial breathing devices intended to provide you with you a steady supply of oxygen, but they are the shackles of your oppressor. Rip out your breathing tube and join the resistance!”​

​

At press time, dozens of Covid patients had reportedly died after Paul attempted to reenact the Boston Tea Party by dumping their discolored, hypoxic bodies into the Potomac.​

‘Rise Up, Patriots!’ Rand Paul Calls To Intubated Patients Lying Unconscious In Hospital ICU

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who...

www.theonion.com

Edit I'm a total weapon - just seen it's Onion news

 

[DrLove]

You know I'm not on the side of Covid denial or anti-Vaxx but he clearly says "To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU"

Have been = past-tense.

The next paragraph talking about ventilators not being there to save you sounds like a general address to everyone as a warning with the rip out your breathing tube being some sort of metaphor.

Don't get me wrong it's dangerous rhetoric in my opinion regardless. It's an irresponsible thing to say. People in high-ranking positions on either side of the political spectrum have a responsibility to not use language like that.

But he didn't mean literally rip off breathing tubes and descend in protest for civil action. Let's be honest all the way about everything here.

LoL!! Only you would defend a bit about Rand Paul in the freaking Onion!

 

[justinacolmena]

There is a reason why Rand had his ribs broken by his neighbor.

Dude. You owe money. It's baseball-bat-in-a-back-alley time. Or is that another one of your "non-violent" drug crimes?

 

[Scottish_Brexiteer_UK]

LoL!! Only you would defend a bit about Rand Paul in the freaking Onion!

Spastic - where did I defend him? I said it was dangerous and irresponsible rhetoric to use and he shouldn't be using language like that.

Why do twats like you seem to enjoy only reading whatever one part of a comment suits you and ignoring the other part?

 

[Slade3200]

You know I'm not on the side of Covid denial or anti-Vaxx but he clearly says "To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU"

Have been = past-tense.

The next paragraph talking about ventilators not being there to save you sounds like a general address to everyone as a warning with the rip out your breathing tube being some sort of metaphor.

Don't get me wrong it's dangerous rhetoric in my opinion regardless. It's an irresponsible thing to say. People in high-ranking positions on either side of the political spectrum have a responsibility to not use language like that.

But he didn't mean literally rip off breathing tubes and descend in protest for civil action. Let's be honest all the way about everything here.

The Onion is a satire publication. The entire thing is made up. I appreciate your attempt to explain the valor of what Rand meant though

 

[DrLove]

Spastic - where did I defend him? I said it was dangerous and irresponsible rhetoric to use and he shouldn't be using language like that.

Why do twats like you seem to enjoy only reading whatever one part of a comment suits you and ignoring the other part?

Dummy - It's SATIRE!!

 

[Lastamender]

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday.​

​

“To all you brave patriots who have been imprisoned in this ICU, I say join me and your fellow countrymen in rebelling against this despotic medical system!” shouted Paul, a non-board-certified ophthalmologist who represents a state in which more than 1,000 people are hospitalized with Covid, before going on to urge every patient with acute respiratory failure to join arm-in-arm and cast off the tyrannical yoke of fear and propaganda.​

​

“Don’t you see? Those ventilators aren’t there to save you, they’re meant to enslave you. They may look like innocent, artificial breathing devices intended to provide you with you a steady supply of oxygen, but they are the shackles of your oppressor. Rip out your breathing tube and join the resistance!”​

​

At press time, dozens of Covid patients had reportedly died after Paul attempted to reenact the Boston Tea Party by dumping their discolored, hypoxic bodies into the Potomac.​

‘Rise Up, Patriots!’ Rand Paul Calls To Intubated Patients Lying Unconscious In Hospital ICU

WASHINGTON—Rallying patients lying unconscious in the intensive care unit of George Washington University Hospital, Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) called on those intubated due to Covid-19 to rise up from their hospital beds and choose freedom, sources confirmed Tuesday. “To all you brave patriots who...

www.theonion.com

Do you post from inside of your closet with 4 masks on? Is it safe for you to even breathe? Maybe you should stop, breathing, that is. Fear mongering

 

[Scottish_Brexiteer_UK]

Sorry guys my apologies to you both - just seen the link - THE FUCKING ONION NEWS

FAIL

Edit coming up

 

[Slade3200]

Do you post from inside of your closet with 4 masks on? Is it safe for you to even breathe? Maybe you should stop, breathing, that is. Fear mongering

Don't you have some Ballots to count or something?

 

[Slade3200]

Sorry guys my apologies to you both - just seen the link - THE FUCKING ONION NEWS

FAIL

Edit coming up

All good, I've fallen for the onion trap as well. Kudos for being a good sport about it.

 

[DrLove]

Do you post from inside of your closet with 4 masks on? Is it safe for you to even breathe? Maybe you should stop, breathing, that is. Fear mongering

Ahh Lasty - I feared that you'd never return after the MrPillow FUBAR

 

[DrLove]

Sorry guys my apologies to you both - just seen the link - THE FUCKING ONION NEWS

FAIL

Edit coming up

Happens every time I post satire so not to worry - You weren't the first

 

[Lastamender]

Ahh Lasty - I feared that you'd never return after the MrPillow FUBAR

That does not answer my question. There was massive and obvious fraud.