Ok, I know what it's like to be a teenager. I was one not long ago. I'm nearly 23 years old, which mean that I entered the teenage years, as I define them, about a decade ago. What I consider the teenage years fall between the start of puberty and high school graduation, usually around 12-18 for girls and closer to 13-18 for guys. I state this for clarity, and because I don't want to hear the classic excuse that I don't know what I'm talking about. I was a teenager 5 years ago and the experience is fresh on my mind. That having been said, here's the rant: I hear almost every day some teenager talking about how the voting age should be lowered and how they need more rights and how they don't get enough say in what happens. Every time I hear this, I want to stab myself in the eye, because, if there's one thing I've figured out over the years, it's that teenagers, as a whole, are really frickin' stupid. I was no exception, though I like to think that I was less stupid than most. However, my view still stands...frickin'...stupid. Here's why. First off, teenagers have no real world experience. They've never had to pay bills, thus they don't truly understand the value of electricity, television, air conditioning, and running water. I used to waste utilities a lot until I had to pay for them one summer. Now, I conserve quite a bit. Most teenagers have never had a job. Those who have still don't get the full experience. Very little of their paycheck immediately rolls back out, as they pay little taxes, and, as stated earlier, no bills. A job is either something your parents made you get to teach you a little hard work, or something that lets you get something your mean, nasty parents won't buy for you from their bottomless coffers. You also don't have to work that hard or that long, thanks to child labor laws, and little is expected of you, since you're just a teenager. Still, you complain about your mean boss who made you stay a whole 15 minutes afterwards to help clean up after that huge rush of business. Big...frickin'...deal. Try getting cooped up in an office a whole weekend, for no extra pay, because all of your co-workers falsified their progress reports so they could goof around instead of doing their projects and when you figure it out, you discover that your co-workers don't care if they get fired and that your boss only cares that it gets done and will fire you, too. Now imagine this happening twice within a 3-month period. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND IF I SEE YOU AGAIN, I WILL LOBOTOMIZE YOU WITH A RUSTY, SALTY SPOON!!! Wait, where was I. Oh yeah, real world experience. This lack of real world experience leads them to complain about the smallest of things simply because they're large by comparison to the other problems in their sheltered lives. I don't care if it's hot, go mow the frickin' lawn or I'll make you pay the fine the city gives me becaues my yard breeds snakes. You don't know what it means to have it bad, so don't pretend that the lack of an Xbox is akin to child abuse. (*disclaimer* I apoligize to those teenagers who do have real problems, such as abuse and abject poverty. You're still stupid, but I wouldn't classify you as whiney. You've had a healthy dose of realism.) This brings me to my next point: Teenagers are whiney. Having had no real problems of their own, teenagers will whine about the tiniest of things. "That guy/girl doesn't like me," "I have a test," "Studying is boring." Oh, shut the Hell up. I'll gladly trade your problems for mine anyday. You have it great, so handle your issues and get on with it. How would you like it if I came in every day saying, "I have to pay the mortgage this week," "Cooking is boring," and "I have rearrange the capacitors on the new prototype?" Yeah, that's what I thought. Oh, and EVERYBODY over 12 knows EXACTLY how you feel. Your problem is not unique or special, as your parents went through it decades ago, and I've been through it more recently. Your problems are IDENTICLE to everyone else's who has EVER been through high school, so I don't want to hear this bullcrap about nobody understanding you anymore. EVERYBODY understands you. Teenagers are easily led. I swear, I have yet to see a teenager with an opinion of their own. Every once in a while, I hear one so outrageous that I think it must be original, only to find out they're copying someone who probably ought to be in an insane asylum. Every time some celebrity says something, every teenager in the country rallies to support that statement, and celebrities are one of the few groups that are even more stupid than teenagers. They also follow fashion trends like lonely puppies. I have worn the same type of clothing ever since my parents stopped dressing me. That's a pair of loose, baggy pants/shorts with an untucked polo/tee shirt. I replace clothes only as they wear out, saving money. I also try to replace the worn out stuff with higher quality shirts, meaning that it's even longer than usual before I have to go shopping. Man, I hate shopping for clothes. That being said, most every teenager I see who can afford it spends hundreds of dollars ever couple of months keeping up with the latest fashion trends so they can look like their favorite model or actor. Lemme give you a hint: Celebrities overpay for rediculous looking clothes because the Hollywood community is grossly pretentious and will call it things like "bold." Also, all celebrities seen outside of a movie set look like whores, mamma's boys, or just, plain stupid. Also, let me tell you one last thing. The only people who know less than you about politics or any other real world concepts are snobby celebrities who sit atop their billion dollar high rise houses, admiring their 50 cars and multi-million dollar outfits, telling well-invested stockholders that they're greedy and that the government should take away their money and give it to the poor. And don't even get me started on the whole punk/goth/emo bullcrap. You want to be 'different,' so you mutilate your body and look like an absolute douche so you can look EXACTLY like a million other punks/goths/emos. It's not different, it's retarded, and good luck getting a job with a black tear tattooed on your cheek. A sidenote on the 'goth culture.' You people whine more than anybody I know. I keep hearing these goth idiots talk about how much their life sucks and that they're going to commit suicide if their horrible, evil parents make them clean up their rooms one more time or deny them the inalienable right to get drunk. Look, if you can afford those stupid-looking goth clothes, black and white make-up, and black hair dye, you've got it better than I do, so shut the Hell up. If you were really suicidal, you'd have done it by now. Teenagers concentrate solely on 'rights' without mentioning 'responsibility.' It's pure, unabashed, entitlement complex. This goes back to them being whiney. I keep hearing teenagers talking about 'my right to privacy,' 'my right to speech,' and 'my right to [insert thing they want].' Look, you little brat, rights aren't free. You have inalienable rights to life, some amount of liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, and that's it. Also, that's pursuit of happiness. If you're not happy, I don't care. Anything other than those three comes with a price. Since you are a dependant of your parents, you are entitled to an education and enough amenities to keep you alive and healthy, nothing more. Your right to privacy only applies to things that are yours. Your parents own everything that's yours, so you don't get that right. You have the right to free speech, but since your parents own everything yours, they have the right to deny these things for any reason, including letting you know that when you speak, trash pours out of your mouth. You have the right to pursue happiness under your own means, but since you are still dependant on your parents, this is pretty much impossible, so get over it and pursue happiness under their means within their guidelines. You're not entitled to anything, so take what you're given and be thankful for it. Athletics over Academia I think this explains itself. Teenagers beat up anyone with half a brain and a desire to learn and idolize those who get together on Friday nights to play a game. In a few years, the beatees are going to be working through college and on their way to a successful career and a great life, while the beaters will be serving them french fries while their formerly hot cheerleader girlfriend grows fat and ugly on the couch while she lives off of welfare and child support payments. Any teenager told to put value on education blows the guy off as a 'nerd.' Lastly, teenagers don't realize that they're stupid. Any of the above wouldn't be a problem except that puberty leads to the belief that anyone over the age of about 20 is a total moron. Teenagers are of the belief that since they are no longer 'kids' that they are now 'adults,' and that adults know everything, unless they disagree with you, and since you know everything, they must be wrong. Well, that's a load of crap. For the reasons listed above, you are stupid. The older you get, the smarter you get, and you're not very old. In some cultures, everyone is required to ask the village elders for advice on things. Sometimes, they're even completely in charge. However, you teenagers just call them idiots or tell them they don't understand and you COMPLETELY blow them off and ignore their advice. Well, my grandparents have been through an awful lot. So have my parents. I know they're smarter than me, so I ask their advice and take it to heart. It's just like the fact that I ask for help lifting things too big for me. But, noooooooo, you know everything and don't need their help and they don't understand you, so you blow off decades of experience because it isn't what you want to hear. This being the case, no teenager should be allowed to vote, ever, and I've also got a few adults in mind, so shut up about your rights and how nobody ever listens to you and accept the fact that you're stupid. Anyway, that's my rant. Glad I got it off my chest. Just a warning, though: I don't really care about my opinion that much on this issue, so if you attack me on this, I most likely won't respond, as attempting to convince a teenager that he/she's not stupid is both an exercise in futility and a waste of my time.