- Sep 22, 2013
- 4,956
- 250
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Are you a fan of Ted Turner?
Are you a fan of Capitalism: A Love Story?
====
A psychotic serial-killer woman named Eileen was dressing as a nun and killing people in Portugal, so a team of secret operatives working for President Trump travelled to Portugal to track Eileen down, since it was suspected she was working for the terrorist group ISIS.
Americans were paranoid about terrorism since 9/11, and the suspicion that Eileen was creating bizarre European 'distractions' in the news while ISIS was planning a lethal invasion of Washington from Canada loomed in the fearful minds of multiple D.C. politicians.
American celebrity Leo DiCaprio wanted to capitalize on all this socio-political 'intrigue' so he made statements in the press like, "Eileen the Psycho-Nun makes me more sensitive about eco-pollution as a modernism evil than terrorism or policework!" Eco-activism was after all arguably the greatest 'masthead' of civilization-critique in the modern era. Even Home Depot hardware stores began carrying energy-efficient fluorescent light-bulbs and the Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation endorsed these 'eco-bulbs' as terrific modern trophies of social consciousness.
As the secret team of Trump's operatives travelled to Portugal to track down Eileen the 'Psycho-Nun,' Trump prepared a peace summit between North Korea and South Korea. The secret operatives included two film-celebrities/thespians and an Internet-blogging Christian missionary (a self-proclaimed 'federalism-vigilante'). The trio were skilled at hand-to-hand fighting as well as long-range target-shooting and all carried silencer-pistols to take Eileen down once and for all.
As the trio scoured Lisbon and other parts of Portugal, they came across a strange merchant-stand which sold intricate Transformers espionage mini-robots made by a Japanese company. The trio, which Trump referred to as 'The Three Stooges', complimented the Portuguese merchant for his Transformers robot-toys and purchased a few to take back to America. 'The Three Stooges' thought deeply about cultural stimulation during espionage/civil missions in foreign lands and wondered how art could cure the 'evil beast' of anti-social malice (i.e., 9/11).
America was indeed about to be invaded by ISIS from Canada, and Trump's 'G.I. Joes' prepared to coordinate strategic positions to hold back any tide coming down from Quebec, Toronto, or Montreal. Meanwhile, American sports-fans were enjoying MLB summer-games and NFL preseason football. ISIS despised sports-marketing in America (e.g., Jerry Maguire) and eagerly awaited for Eileen the 'Psycho-Nun' to complete her 'mission' so their terrorists could initiate their daring new millennium 'doomsday plan.'
American film-makers such as Sam Raimi and Peter Jackson fashioned culturally-symbolic films that presented stories about leadership and creative governance to reflect this new age social intrigue regarding 'evolving political consciousness' in the age of networking and tech-toys. How would 'The Three Stooges' or ISIS or the Trump Administration be evaluated by artists re-presenting modernism angst towards consumerism/capitalism? Would First Lady Melania Trump be considered a gracious 'capitalism-diplomat' of modern civilization?
American espionage fiction-writers began hypothesizing the existence of 'covert teams' of democracy-defenders such as Trump's 'Three Stooges' and so they wrote stories about the metaphysical/philosophical value of consumerism-symbolic 'tokens/trophies' such as nonviolence-promoting water-guns (which the NRA despised). American media mogul Ted Turner (founder/owner of various iconic TV networks including TNT, TBS, and CNN) was considered a new age 'DC diplomat' since he did for American 'aesthetics' what Alexander Hamilton did for American 'piggy-banks.'
As 'The Three Stooges' pursued Eileen the 'Psycho-Nun' in Portugal, Trump considered the possibility that ISIS was not planning to invade D.C. through Canada but rather Europe and wanted to use the Portugal psycho-nun fiasco as the real distraction. Trump immediately got on the phone with the CIA to warn his Three Stooges that ISIS may be in fact using Eileen as a distraction there rather than on American soil. It was anarchy and a 'conspiracy madness,' but was it heretical? Was capitalism worth all this 'passion' in terms of political scheming?
As Trump's Three Stooges enjoyed a summer street-parade in Lisbon, Portugal, Eileen the 'Psycho-Nun' began targeting them and plotting to kill all three of them. The Three Stooges were Trump's true 'musketeers' and the U.S. President did not want to lose them to random acts of anti-Western insanity (i.e., terrorism/crime).
GOD: I like these 'Three Stooges.'
SATAN: So does Trump...
GOD: Terrorism is so jagged!
SATAN: It really unnerves civilization.
GOD: They should make more patriotic video-games.
SATAN: The Three Stooges have enjoyed Portuguese sardines...
GOD: Consumerism is a lifestyle really.
SATAN: Are you a fan of Facebook?
GOD: I like that the government has created cyber-security protocols.
SATAN: Yes, I'm sure Trump endorses that!
GOD: Trump is dealing with personal media scandals.
SATAN: He also has to deal with North/South Korea.
GOD: The PyeongChang Olympics saw a vital alliance between the Koreas.
SATAN: Commerce has to save the day; lest capitalism create Armageddon.
GOD: Now that the Cold War is over, people fear terrorism only...
SATAN: Perhaps the Three Stooges and Mission: Impossible films encourage idealism!
GOD: Yes, Americans want to think 'optimistically' about political intelligence/imagination.
SATAN: I think 'political intelligence' is an oxymoron (or is that heresy?).
====
Are you a fan of Capitalism: A Love Story?
====
A psychotic serial-killer woman named Eileen was dressing as a nun and killing people in Portugal, so a team of secret operatives working for President Trump travelled to Portugal to track Eileen down, since it was suspected she was working for the terrorist group ISIS.
Americans were paranoid about terrorism since 9/11, and the suspicion that Eileen was creating bizarre European 'distractions' in the news while ISIS was planning a lethal invasion of Washington from Canada loomed in the fearful minds of multiple D.C. politicians.
American celebrity Leo DiCaprio wanted to capitalize on all this socio-political 'intrigue' so he made statements in the press like, "Eileen the Psycho-Nun makes me more sensitive about eco-pollution as a modernism evil than terrorism or policework!" Eco-activism was after all arguably the greatest 'masthead' of civilization-critique in the modern era. Even Home Depot hardware stores began carrying energy-efficient fluorescent light-bulbs and the Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation endorsed these 'eco-bulbs' as terrific modern trophies of social consciousness.
As the secret team of Trump's operatives travelled to Portugal to track down Eileen the 'Psycho-Nun,' Trump prepared a peace summit between North Korea and South Korea. The secret operatives included two film-celebrities/thespians and an Internet-blogging Christian missionary (a self-proclaimed 'federalism-vigilante'). The trio were skilled at hand-to-hand fighting as well as long-range target-shooting and all carried silencer-pistols to take Eileen down once and for all.
As the trio scoured Lisbon and other parts of Portugal, they came across a strange merchant-stand which sold intricate Transformers espionage mini-robots made by a Japanese company. The trio, which Trump referred to as 'The Three Stooges', complimented the Portuguese merchant for his Transformers robot-toys and purchased a few to take back to America. 'The Three Stooges' thought deeply about cultural stimulation during espionage/civil missions in foreign lands and wondered how art could cure the 'evil beast' of anti-social malice (i.e., 9/11).
America was indeed about to be invaded by ISIS from Canada, and Trump's 'G.I. Joes' prepared to coordinate strategic positions to hold back any tide coming down from Quebec, Toronto, or Montreal. Meanwhile, American sports-fans were enjoying MLB summer-games and NFL preseason football. ISIS despised sports-marketing in America (e.g., Jerry Maguire) and eagerly awaited for Eileen the 'Psycho-Nun' to complete her 'mission' so their terrorists could initiate their daring new millennium 'doomsday plan.'
American film-makers such as Sam Raimi and Peter Jackson fashioned culturally-symbolic films that presented stories about leadership and creative governance to reflect this new age social intrigue regarding 'evolving political consciousness' in the age of networking and tech-toys. How would 'The Three Stooges' or ISIS or the Trump Administration be evaluated by artists re-presenting modernism angst towards consumerism/capitalism? Would First Lady Melania Trump be considered a gracious 'capitalism-diplomat' of modern civilization?
American espionage fiction-writers began hypothesizing the existence of 'covert teams' of democracy-defenders such as Trump's 'Three Stooges' and so they wrote stories about the metaphysical/philosophical value of consumerism-symbolic 'tokens/trophies' such as nonviolence-promoting water-guns (which the NRA despised). American media mogul Ted Turner (founder/owner of various iconic TV networks including TNT, TBS, and CNN) was considered a new age 'DC diplomat' since he did for American 'aesthetics' what Alexander Hamilton did for American 'piggy-banks.'
As 'The Three Stooges' pursued Eileen the 'Psycho-Nun' in Portugal, Trump considered the possibility that ISIS was not planning to invade D.C. through Canada but rather Europe and wanted to use the Portugal psycho-nun fiasco as the real distraction. Trump immediately got on the phone with the CIA to warn his Three Stooges that ISIS may be in fact using Eileen as a distraction there rather than on American soil. It was anarchy and a 'conspiracy madness,' but was it heretical? Was capitalism worth all this 'passion' in terms of political scheming?
As Trump's Three Stooges enjoyed a summer street-parade in Lisbon, Portugal, Eileen the 'Psycho-Nun' began targeting them and plotting to kill all three of them. The Three Stooges were Trump's true 'musketeers' and the U.S. President did not want to lose them to random acts of anti-Western insanity (i.e., terrorism/crime).
GOD: I like these 'Three Stooges.'
SATAN: So does Trump...
GOD: Terrorism is so jagged!
SATAN: It really unnerves civilization.
GOD: They should make more patriotic video-games.
SATAN: The Three Stooges have enjoyed Portuguese sardines...
GOD: Consumerism is a lifestyle really.
SATAN: Are you a fan of Facebook?
GOD: I like that the government has created cyber-security protocols.
SATAN: Yes, I'm sure Trump endorses that!
GOD: Trump is dealing with personal media scandals.
SATAN: He also has to deal with North/South Korea.
GOD: The PyeongChang Olympics saw a vital alliance between the Koreas.
SATAN: Commerce has to save the day; lest capitalism create Armageddon.
GOD: Now that the Cold War is over, people fear terrorism only...
SATAN: Perhaps the Three Stooges and Mission: Impossible films encourage idealism!
GOD: Yes, Americans want to think 'optimistically' about political intelligence/imagination.
SATAN: I think 'political intelligence' is an oxymoron (or is that heresy?).
====
