I'm beginning to collect a scrapbook of the Sheriff's Report that is posted in our small town newspaper because it is so funny, and I'm going to use some of the news events to write short stories. I thought I'd share some and see if that inspires me or anyone else to make up a story to go with the reports. These are excerpts from real life reports as printed in our local paper: Several stray dogs are brought to the shelter A dog or possibly mountain lion is killing sheep in DC Vandalism to the elementary school Items out of place in a woman's home Juveniles make a skate ramp out of new bleachers delivered to the park baseball field. Billboards taken off the fence, condoms and beer bottles found inside the dugout. Violation of a restraining order Report of a victim bitten while feeding a raccoon. Victim declines medical treatment. Theft of a county radio from solid waste Out of control 17 year old daughter 16 year old son smoking pot and drinking Unstable subject at gas station yelling and scaring customers Subject caught stealing firewood Juveniles riding motorcycles and three wheelers at the reservoir CHP requests assistance with two persons, both drunk, one stating the other ran over his fence, ran over his dogs foot, then took the fence causing $5000in damage. An arrest is made for DUI. Intoxicated caller reports he was assaulted. Alleged suspect denies incident and is admonished. Dogs attacking dogs in JC. Shots fired in Oldtown. Large group of juveniles headed to Cedar Creek for party. Five feral cats are brought to the animal shelter Many dogs are brought to the animal shelter including a litter of ten puppies. A neighbor yelling profanity at a W-town woman and throwing rocks at her fence. Officer finds that the fence is owned by the suspect, who is upset at the woman's barking dogs. Three males in a VW bug spinning circles on the church lawn. No visible damage. Suspects admonished. Flue fire. Three medical calls. Caller reports his brother is telling people that the caller hits women and is threatening to kill the brother and throw him in the river. Caller reports a dead coyote by the river and concerns that her dogs could get rabies. Caller is advised that rabies is transmitted by a bite. Loose peacocks. Child abuse. Caller reports being assaulted by a female for taking clothes out of a washing machine and putting them in a basket. Victim says she was choked and her hair was pulled. ACO speaks to a horse owner in DC saying the horse must have access to water at all times and cannot always be tied. A caller reports she was advised by the fire department and her landlord not to go back to her home which burned down Friday night, but the landlord and a male have been at the site. Garbage thrown into a truck. Officer advises male that he has been 86'd from a business where he worked after caller reports he was intoxicated and touched a female inappropriately. Caller reports his sister threatened to kick his ass. Vandalism and dead chicken reported. Chicken appears to have been killed by an animal. Neighbor cutting trees on anothers property yells at woman and comes after her dogs with a chain saw. Caller reports her husband trying to kick a woman out of house who pushed her way in the door. He tells it differently and caller is arrested for public intoxication. Child crying frantically for its mother. Officer reports that the child wanted to go with its mother when she left. Man with schizophrenia has not contacted family in days and last called from a bar. Officer spots him walking in front of sheriffs office and gives him ride to a hotel. Rooster in Mad River that disturbs the peace with crowing. Owner is told to contain rooster until after 6 am. He in turn complains about another rooster that crows. Female screaming. Gone when officer arrives. Large vegetation fire on a no burn day. Missing rottweiler 'Brody'. A bone is found in a community forest. It is sent to forensics to determine if it is human. A possible break in at the Bully Choop Mine. Burglary to a cabin, including forced entry. Food eaten and signs of drug activity including burned tin foil. Fire started by a suspect on Mountain Summitt. Suspect determined to be a transient trying to keep warm. Break in at home, bedroom window broken, TV on floor and two rifles missing. A rape is reported. Man reports he was sleeping outside and attacked by a fox who bit him in the arm. Man killed the fox with a shovel. Man is taken for medical treatment. Fox was taken to veterinarian who sent its head to the lab. Fox is found to be rabid.