I have insomnia (worries)

[Middleman]

I don't often get it, but I have it tonight. It's a combo of getting over this darned cold, and realizing that I have to evict a tenant who is mentally ill, has sole custody of a special needs son (autism?), and would be a perfect candidate to go on Hoarders.

I ended up with her because she was living with the fellow who bought this fixer upper on a sales contract. I had to repossess the house, and since she was utterly entrenched there, I didn't have the energy or will at the time to kick her out. So, I let her stay for $500 a month.

I won't go into details, but things are getting weird, she won't answer my calls, and I've resolved that I need to give her notice.

I want to sell the house, but will need to do some major renovations, and I'd like to do that while hopefully the market starts recovering. I was hoping to keep her in there another year, but I think I'll have to start the eviction process now. I don't think she'll go easily. I'm pretty sure she's either bipolar or schizophrenic, and has agoraphobia. She is on disability for both physical and mental problems, and is most likely on large doses of pain meds too. She is very manipulative.

I've managed to handle her with kid gloves until now, mainly by staying away, and I shudder at the thought of what the inside of her house looks like. The outside is deplorable, and I had the city complain once.

It's just another bump in the road, but I need to extract this woman and her crap, get this house and garden in shape, and sell the house in order to fund my last two children's college education.

Anyways, this is weighing on my mind tonight, and it's ruining my sleep.

 

[California Girl]

I get insomnia a lot - but without the burden of crap that you have to deal with. You have my sympathies! I can offer no advice on your tenant, other than to grit your teeth and do what is necessary.

 

[Sarah G]

I don't often get it, but I have it tonight. It's a combo of getting over this darned cold, and realizing that I have to evict a tenant who is mentally ill, has sole custody of a special needs son (autism?), and would be a perfect candidate to go on Hoarders.

I ended up with her because she was living with the fellow who bought this fixer upper on a sales contract. I had to repossess the house, and since she was utterly entrenched there, I didn't have the energy or will at the time to kick her out. So, I let her stay for $500 a month.

I won't go into details, but things are getting weird, she won't answer my calls, and I've resolved that I need to give her notice.

I want to sell the house, but will need to do some major renovations, and I'd like to do that while hopefully the market starts recovering. I was hoping to keep her in there another year, but I think I'll have to start the eviction process now. I don't think she'll go easily. I'm pretty sure she's either bipolar or schizophrenic, and has agoraphobia. She is on disability for both physical and mental problems, and is most likely on large doses of pain meds too. She is very manipulative.

I've managed to handle her with kid gloves until now, mainly by staying away, and I shudder at the thought of what the inside of her house looks like. The outside is deplorable, and I had the city complain once.

It's just another bump in the road, but I need to extract this woman and her crap, get this house and garden in shape, and sell the house in order to fund my last two children's college education.

Anyways, this is weighing on my mind tonight, and it's ruining my sleep.

I had insomnia last night too. I did manage to get 4 hrs of sleep but I'm on my way to work and I am tired.

You should just get it overwith asap. Once you get the ball rolling, you will sleep better.

That's a tough one.

 

[Middleman]

I get insomnia a lot - but without the burden of crap that you have to deal with. You have my sympathies! I can offer no advice on your tenant, other than to grit your teeth and do what is necessary.

That must be hard to deal with insomnia regularly.

I have a busy day tomorrow, and it's 0422 here now.

 

[Middleman]

I don't often get it, but I have it tonight. It's a combo of getting over this darned cold, and realizing that I have to evict a tenant who is mentally ill, has sole custody of a special needs son (autism?), and would be a perfect candidate to go on Hoarders.

I ended up with her because she was living with the fellow who bought this fixer upper on a sales contract. I had to repossess the house, and since she was utterly entrenched there, I didn't have the energy or will at the time to kick her out. So, I let her stay for $500 a month.

I won't go into details, but things are getting weird, she won't answer my calls, and I've resolved that I need to give her notice.

I want to sell the house, but will need to do some major renovations, and I'd like to do that while hopefully the market starts recovering. I was hoping to keep her in there another year, but I think I'll have to start the eviction process now. I don't think she'll go easily. I'm pretty sure she's either bipolar or schizophrenic, and has agoraphobia. She is on disability for both physical and mental problems, and is most likely on large doses of pain meds too. She is very manipulative.

I've managed to handle her with kid gloves until now, mainly by staying away, and I shudder at the thought of what the inside of her house looks like. The outside is deplorable, and I had the city complain once.

It's just another bump in the road, but I need to extract this woman and her crap, get this house and garden in shape, and sell the house in order to fund my last two children's college education.

Anyways, this is weighing on my mind tonight, and it's ruining my sleep.

I had insomnia last night too. I did manage to get 4 hrs of sleep but I'm on my way to work and I am tired.

You should just get it overwith asap. Once you get the ball rolling, you will sleep better.

That's a tough one.

Yes, I'll call my lawyer and leave it entirely in their hands. They can handle everything, including the initial 30 day notice to vacate.

I've been putting a ton of money to pay off my house in 6 months, and got real focused on that. I'm having to change plans midstream, which is always hard for me at first. I wanted to pay off the house, then start working on this rental, and work on getting her out.

 

[Douger]

First off the market is never going to recover.
Second. Call the law and let them toss her out. They like that better than BJ's from transvestite street hookers.
Last. I recommend a glass of Blantons or Flor de Cana.

 

[Mr.Fitnah]

Call the private social services for advice , maybe they can send help.

 

[Toro]

I used to be a chronic insomniac.

The way to help you go to sleep is to divert your mind away from what is distracting you. I listen to podcasts every night before I go to sleep.

 

[007]

xo... you were thinking of buying a property with rental possibilities... are you starting to see what you're in for?

Middleman... sorry to hear about your problems pard, but a person has to do what they have to do. Just get it over with.

 

[Samson]

I used to be a chronic insomniac.

The way to help you go to sleep is to divert your mind away from what is distracting you. I listen to podcasts every night before I go to sleep.

I login to USMB and read rdean's posts.

 

[blu]

I don't often get it, but I have it tonight. It's a combo of getting over this darned cold, and realizing that I have to evict a tenant who is mentally ill, has sole custody of a special needs son (autism?), and would be a perfect candidate to go on Hoarders.

I ended up with her because she was living with the fellow who bought this fixer upper on a sales contract. I had to repossess the house, and since she was utterly entrenched there, I didn't have the energy or will at the time to kick her out. So, I let her stay for $500 a month.

I won't go into details, but things are getting weird, she won't answer my calls, and I've resolved that I need to give her notice.

I want to sell the house, but will need to do some major renovations, and I'd like to do that while hopefully the market starts recovering. I was hoping to keep her in there another year, but I think I'll have to start the eviction process now. I don't think she'll go easily. I'm pretty sure she's either bipolar or schizophrenic, and has agoraphobia. She is on disability for both physical and mental problems, and is most likely on large doses of pain meds too. She is very manipulative.

I've managed to handle her with kid gloves until now, mainly by staying away, and I shudder at the thought of what the inside of her house looks like. The outside is deplorable, and I had the city complain once.

It's just another bump in the road, but I need to extract this woman and her crap, get this house and garden in shape, and sell the house in order to fund my last two children's college education.

Anyways, this is weighing on my mind tonight, and it's ruining my sleep.

how much is your two kids education that you have to sell a house for it?? :/ student loans, with you helping them pay it back after seems like a much better idea. you can even pay some of it off montlhly while they are in college while its still 0% interest

 

[Zoom-boing]

I've used this and have also given this to my kids. It worked for us and is worth a try. You can get it anywhere, Target has it and is usually in the 'organic' aisle of grocery stores.

Buy Boiron Quietude, for Sleeplessness and Restless Sleep Online at drugstore.com

 

[syrenn]

I have insomnia too. Try a hot shower and soothing relaxing music. Turn the TV off and just concentrate on your breathing. Don't lay in bad if your wide awake...get up and do something... play on the internet. It SUCKS!!!


As for your tenet..i don't think you can kick her out unless your really put the house up for sale.. because she is going to use the disabled card on you.

 

[Middleman]

I received the rent from her today with a bizarre letter. Basically, I believe the inside of the house is substandard and deplorable. She obviously is living in unsanitary conditions, and seems to be afraid to have me enter the house. I have always realized that ignorance is bliss in that department, until I was ready to go to the trouble and expense to evict her.

I had left several messages, requesting a conversation with her. I usually call her each month to remind her regarding the rent. Plus, I wanted to share my timeline regarding when I would need her to move because of my plans to clean up the mess, and spend probably $20,000 putting on new siding, renovating the kitchen and bathroom, plus redo the landscaping, in preparation for selling the house.

She mailed the rent, something she never does. She enclosed this letter, to give you all an idea as to her state of mind. I am seriously considering going to the school district with this letter, they are mandated reporters, and I think they would be required to clue in child services.

In one of my messages I stated that I would be coming by the house Sunday afternoon. In my State, a landlord is required to give 48 hrs notice, and the tenant in not to deny reasonable requests by the landlord to check on the property. She is claiming to have fixed the hot water heater, which she never notified me was broken, deducted the expense from the rent, and has refused to provide receipts.

TO:Middleman
1)I have had a migraine for 3 days. I just got the meds.
2)You have been harrassing me for 3 days.
3)I am profoundly ill and disabled. You know this
4)You are making me worse.
5)Stop. OR, Be sued for damages which are documented and many
6)You are scaring me.
7)You are, and have been, scaring Isaiah. (her little boy)
8)Isaiah is profoundly depressed to be facing homeless and/or his mom getting sicker.
9)Isaiah has therefore dropped out of school
10)You have done enough damage
11)STOP!
12)If you go to enter this premisis uninvited I will call the POLICE and have you arrested.
13)One more act of harrassment will get you the anti-harrassment protection order they say I should get against you. (The Police say this!)
14)AND, you will have a very hard time ever being employed again if you have an order like this against you!

Sincerely, Your Paid-Up and Responsible Renters
Mary L Doe
and
Isaiah D Doe

In other words, she is mentally ill, and not a particularly fit parent. The only thing I did, btw, was to leave one phone message a day, trying to get in touch with her, to discuss my plans for the house. In one message I gave her notice that I planned to come by and talk to her, and inspect the water heater.

 

[syrenn]

Put the house up for sale as soon as you can..even if you are not serious about selling it.
and
Get a lawyer and start LEGAL eviction proceedings as soon as possible.


She is setting you up if you haven't seen that yet. Oh the joys of rental property.

 

[Middleman]

Put the house up for sale as soon as you can..even if you are not serious about selling it.
and
Get a lawyer and start LEGAL eviction proceedings as soon as possible.


She is setting you up if you haven't seen that yet. Oh the joys of rental property.

I spoke to the attorney today, he is sending her the certified mail notice today, plus having a retired police officer deliver a copy. That's the officer she spoke with and probably why I got the money today.

I figure it will most likely take the winter to extract here from the residence, which is just fine with me, since it's actually better to have the home occupied her in our cold winters. Then, in the Spring and Summer, I can begin the process of renovation and repair.

I'm glad this all happened. I was being very passive, and it will be good to get going on this process.

 

[Madeline]

Middleman, this lady clearly needs some professional intervention. Your county prolly has some sort of an advocate for the mentally ill, and the idea of going to the child's school is promising, but I'd check with the lawyers first just in an abundance of caution.

I have bouts of life-threatening insomnia. I'm exaggerating, but not by much. I can go 10, 14 days without sleep if I get hit hard...and of course, I can barely walk when it happens. Been through a few sleep studies, and they did not help but I know people who swear by the remedies they offered. If this is a chronic problem a sleep study is worth having done -- if they can help, apparently they work miracles.

So here's my advice for tonight:

You cannot use the computer AT ALL when this is happening. It is far too stimulating in exactly the wrong way. You need your mind to quiet, and this will never happen watching youtube and flipping through 1,001 web sites.

Instead, what you want is a stimuli that'll capture your mind and keep it focused but not raise your anxiety level. Nix on the war movies, etc. but a comedy is a good choice. Reading is better than watching television but sometimes that's not possible. I like Agatha Christy novels for these miserable occasions.

For me, there is no sleeping pill that works, at least none any MD would give me. I'd need general anesthesia to get to sleep when this is very bad. I don't take anything because feeling even drowsier but still not sleeping only deepens my suffering...and I am convinced the whole family of drugs they use have a boomerang effect that can increase the severity of the next bout. Yanno, lunestra, etc.

Take care of what you eat and drink, and try to reduce your smoking if you do. Treat yourself like you have the flu and wear your fuzzy pjs and bunny slippers (or whatever men use instead). Get plenty of liquid (but no alcohol) and remember to eat; hunger will help keep you awake.

Be very careful in using a car or whatnot...your eye hand coordination sucks like a Hoover right now.

I am going to keep a good thought for you, and if I can help any, please PM me.

 

[fyrenza]

Are you Christian?

Or religious?

Pray about it. That's the best you can do for her, at this point,

especially if you can't afford, you own self, to Shore Her Up.

If you want to invest the time, you could look for agencies that might be willing to offset her costs of living and provide the mental support she needs,

but YOU can only do so much.

It's a fucking hard row to hoe, friend:

You WANT to help, but you only have so many resources, yourself.

Pray about it and KNOW that God will take care of the details.

My heart goes out to you, bro, and I'll keep YOU in my prayers!

 

[Madeline]

One more thought: I did not know this until my last sleep study, but an insomniac does sleep. These mini-naps might last 30 seconds or as much as five minutes and might recur every hour. The insomniac is generally unaware he's been asleep at all; I certainly did not know. This is one reason driving is so dangerous during an episode.

What you are experiencing is a form of torture, and you could actually murder someone by depriving them of sleep. It's okay to admit to yourself and others you feel shitty and perform at a reduced rate till this passes.

 

[Middleman]

This lady actually has a wealthy family who has bailed her out many times, I hear. After the hot water episode of last month, her elderly mother called. She is very genteel sounding, yet also manipulative, plus in deep denial regarding her daughter. It was a very strange phone call.