Game of Thrones, Books 6 & 7

[CrusaderFrank]

Bran Stark joins Hodor in his journey to Hodorland, a land inhabited by a race of Giants. It turns out that the only word they speak is "Hodor" but their hearing is so sensitive that an infinite amount of information can be communicated via microvariations in how the word is pronounced. They Hodorians howl with gales of Hodorian laughter as Hodor regales with with all the invectives he spewed at the Starks while they thought he was a total idiot repeating the same word over and over. Hodor.

Sam Tarney finds a book of magic spells and travels to Hogwarts to complete his Jedi training

Valerian Steel, still totally useless

Theon Greyjoys Uncle Valerion finds the Horn of Jorelemon but it turns out that instead of knocking down The Wall it orders pizza from Dominoes -- 18,000 large pies with garlic knots and Ceasar salad

 

[boedicca]

This is fun!


Whilst fleeing from Lord Baelish, Sansa gets lost in the Vale, where she becomes involved in a love triangle with a Werewolf and a Vampire. She spends years feeling depressed that they are both hopelessly in love with her, and falls into a deep sleep after taking a bite from a poisoned apple.

 

[CrusaderFrank]

And we're still no closer to the ultimate battle between the ice people and what's her name Dragons