Fuck My Life ...

Discussion in 'Humor' started by driveby, Feb 14, 2009.

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  1. driveby
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    driveby Gold Member

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    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  2. Zoom-boing
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    Zoom-boing Gold Member

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    :lol:
     
  3. Dis
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    LMAO. Boys are mean.
     
  4. driveby
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    driveby Gold Member

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    A few that i thought were good:



    Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML

    Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired. FML

    Today, my on-and-off boyfriend of 8 years asked me to cheer him up. I told him that I'm in love with him. He said "Oh, I just wanted a blowjob." FML

    Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11 to her garage where we start to have sex. When she comes to climax she slips and hits her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down, we were both still naked and she was unconscious. FML

    Today, my wife told me that if she had a penny for every time I had brought her to climax she'd have change for a nickel. We've been married for 16 years. FML
     
  5. Amanda
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    Amanda Calm as a Hindu cow

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    What's wrong with that? Sometimes you really need to tell your friends something.
     
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  6. driveby
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    driveby Gold Member

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    i just spit my drink onto my screen, thanks ... :lol:
     
  7. Amanda
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    Amanda Calm as a Hindu cow

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    Oh please, it's not like guys don't love to play XBox while they're getting blown. Take your double standards somewhere else! :tongue:
     
  8. Dis
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    Err.. If they do, you're doing it wrong.. :lol:
     
  9. driveby
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    driveby Gold Member

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    :redface:

    ahhh, can't argue with ya there .......
     
  10. driveby
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    driveby Gold Member

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    Not necessarily, if i do terrible on the game she's doing ok. If i break a scoring record during it, she's doing something wrong...... :tongue:

    P.S. If this thread turns into a discussion about oral sex, watch how quick it blows up, no pun intended .....
     
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2009
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