A man was brought into the emergency room with black eyes and bruises all over and with a 5 iron wrapped around his neck. The intern asked "What happened here?" The man said "My wife won the lottery, so we have been doing all kinds of things we wanted over the years. Today we decided to try golf. We got brand new clubs and monogrammed balls and we tried to play on the county links. First tee, my wife and I both hit the ball so it flies way off to the right and into a pasture where there are cattle grazing. I go out there, and she is following me, and I see this cow in distress. I look under the tail, and there is my wife's golf ball with her named monogrammed on it. I turn to her and I say "hey, this one looks like yours..." After that, I don't remember.