I really don't think it's up to you or me to "come up with a consensus" since neither of us can cover various situations requiring the use of deadly force (or not) that a person might find themselves in.Personally? A guy showing me a gun and a guy with a hand on a gun even if it is holstered are 2 different levels of threat.
Really if a guy is close enough to you to see you are armed then he is close enough to justify pulling a gun again this is my opinion. I am not trying to push a definition on anyone i am trying to see if we can come up with a consensus for a working definition to use going forward.