http://www.qis.net/~jimjr/pol98.htm
Bon Voyage
Attention all disenfranchised liberals
(and other assorted pinheads):
Would Alec Baldwin, Rosie O'Donnell, Cher, Phil Donahue, David Geffen, Barbra Streisand, Pierre Salinger and all other bleeding heart liberals and/or those who considered themselves disenfranchised, and who previously announced they would leave the country if George Bush was elected President, please report to Miami Florida for the sailing of the Good Ship Lollipop, which has been re-commissioned to take you to your new home.
The location of the destination is being kept secret at this time, but from what I understand, it's a remote, secure island where you'll have no fear of being voted off.
Please pack for an extended stay... at least four years -- hopefully, eight.
The US Supreme Court has agreed to declare all passengers "Persona non Grata" for at least the next four years... hopefully, eight. Their debate concerning freezing the assets of those leaving was cut short when it was pointed-out they'd be nothing to buy on the island anyway.
Those fun-lovin' guys and gals at the Florida Supreme Court will sponsor a Farewell Parade in your honor through Palm Beach, Broward and Miami-Dade counties prior to your cruise.
Leon County (Florida) Circuit Court Judge Sanders "Truck Them Ballots" Sauls is to provide transportation from your residence directly to the docking facilities.
All Boarding Passes, Inoculation Records and Passports will be checked by the Palm Beach County Election Board.
Captain Bill "Pardon Me" Clinton has never piloted a ship, but insiders (speaking on the condition of annihilation) state he holds a hell of a "Captain's Mast". Actually, he's performing a civic duty leaving the US now in keeping with the Government's "Keep Foot and Mouth Disease Out of the Country" campaign to deal with the outbreak of the disease in Europe.
Cruise Director will be Al Gore. Old "Chuckles" himself is taking a sabbatical leave from his professorial sleep-fest. Aides said the former VP and loser emeritus plans to liven-up the cruise with nitely debates on "Election 2000: Who really lost ?"
Joe Lieberman will be your Purser on board the ship, and once at your final destination will establish The Progressive Bank of Mores. In his spare time, Joe will roam about the island at random, serving as the populace's collective conscience.
Monica Lewinsky will be your Recreation Director and cigarette and cigar girl.
Nuff said !
Ted Kennedy will be on hand to give swimming instructions. He will also be serving as the Chief Whine Steward.
The Reverend Jesse Jackson will provide spiritual guidance. Long since re-freshed after almost 12 long and bitter soul searching hours of withdrawing from public life to "review my spirit and reconnect with my family" -- the irrepressible Jackson's back !
For those that require a wake up call during this extended cruise, Janet Reno will happily kick in your cabin door and awaken you at gunpoint.
Your primary job, while self-exiled, will be to pound sand until such time as you realize the worthlessness of your liberal ways and gain a grasp on reality -- which may be never for some of you.
If you have any questions about your final destination, please direct your comments to ex-Co-President Hillary. She's staying behind and will be in charge of nursing whining liberals for the next four years... at least four years anyway -- hopefully eight.
Bon Voyage
Attention all disenfranchised liberals
(and other assorted pinheads):
Would Alec Baldwin, Rosie O'Donnell, Cher, Phil Donahue, David Geffen, Barbra Streisand, Pierre Salinger and all other bleeding heart liberals and/or those who considered themselves disenfranchised, and who previously announced they would leave the country if George Bush was elected President, please report to Miami Florida for the sailing of the Good Ship Lollipop, which has been re-commissioned to take you to your new home.
The location of the destination is being kept secret at this time, but from what I understand, it's a remote, secure island where you'll have no fear of being voted off.
Please pack for an extended stay... at least four years -- hopefully, eight.
The US Supreme Court has agreed to declare all passengers "Persona non Grata" for at least the next four years... hopefully, eight. Their debate concerning freezing the assets of those leaving was cut short when it was pointed-out they'd be nothing to buy on the island anyway.
Those fun-lovin' guys and gals at the Florida Supreme Court will sponsor a Farewell Parade in your honor through Palm Beach, Broward and Miami-Dade counties prior to your cruise.
Leon County (Florida) Circuit Court Judge Sanders "Truck Them Ballots" Sauls is to provide transportation from your residence directly to the docking facilities.
All Boarding Passes, Inoculation Records and Passports will be checked by the Palm Beach County Election Board.
Captain Bill "Pardon Me" Clinton has never piloted a ship, but insiders (speaking on the condition of annihilation) state he holds a hell of a "Captain's Mast". Actually, he's performing a civic duty leaving the US now in keeping with the Government's "Keep Foot and Mouth Disease Out of the Country" campaign to deal with the outbreak of the disease in Europe.
Cruise Director will be Al Gore. Old "Chuckles" himself is taking a sabbatical leave from his professorial sleep-fest. Aides said the former VP and loser emeritus plans to liven-up the cruise with nitely debates on "Election 2000: Who really lost ?"
Joe Lieberman will be your Purser on board the ship, and once at your final destination will establish The Progressive Bank of Mores. In his spare time, Joe will roam about the island at random, serving as the populace's collective conscience.
Monica Lewinsky will be your Recreation Director and cigarette and cigar girl.
Nuff said !
Ted Kennedy will be on hand to give swimming instructions. He will also be serving as the Chief Whine Steward.
The Reverend Jesse Jackson will provide spiritual guidance. Long since re-freshed after almost 12 long and bitter soul searching hours of withdrawing from public life to "review my spirit and reconnect with my family" -- the irrepressible Jackson's back !
For those that require a wake up call during this extended cruise, Janet Reno will happily kick in your cabin door and awaken you at gunpoint.
Your primary job, while self-exiled, will be to pound sand until such time as you realize the worthlessness of your liberal ways and gain a grasp on reality -- which may be never for some of you.
If you have any questions about your final destination, please direct your comments to ex-Co-President Hillary. She's staying behind and will be in charge of nursing whining liberals for the next four years... at least four years anyway -- hopefully eight.
