Alcoholics

[Gracie]

Why do you drink to be drunk? I asked Mr Gracie that years ago and he said he started drinking at 18 years old to impress his brothers...who were all drunks as well. He is the youngest son...and has 6 older brothers. 3 are still alive. The other 3 are dead. All are sober now, including Mr Gracie. So for him..it was peer pressure. He was never a sloppy drunk, either. He drank enough to keep a steady buzz. One of those drunks that nobody knows is drunk unless they knew the signs. He didn't go to AA. He said "sitting around a table listening to everyone's sob stories makes me want to go get drunk" so he went to two and said no more. After 42 years of being a daily drunk, he got sober by drinking shitloads of hot tea which he STILL drinks daily. And candy. Lots of candy. This year it will be 7 years of sobriety.

Watching tv shows, like Jail, Cops, etc....even going to kareoke with my SIL a few times and being doomed to sit there as she sang while drunk people wobbled all over the place making asses of themselves, I just wondered if anyone has seen what they say and do when drunk and if they saw what WE see, would it make them NOT drink any more or to NOT WANT to drink any more? Is it pain that makes you drink til you are drunk? Mental pain? Physical pain? Or you just don't remember any more and just do it because you are addicted?

It's been a long time since I have been to an Alanon meeting. I am no longer around drunks...except when I come here to usmb. At least I don't have to live with it in my own home any more, which is a blessing.

So..I thought I would ask the guys (and gals) here that talk about "yes, I'm drunk right now" or "I'm gonna be drunk in a little while" or some such...WHY they do it. And if their families drink too...or are ok with it..or are slowly dying along with you as you kill yourself. And if you are ever embarrassed the next day reading what you posted.

 

[there4eyeM]

For one, it is a very cheap and very available drug. We can therefore assume consumption is for similar reasons as for other mind-changing substances. Alcohol does have its particular characteristics. Its well known effects on inhibition, libido, etc., make it ideal of the neurotic societies we have created in the world.Drunk is something this poster does not enjoy being, though in youth there were any number of instances. Some good Scotch, a nice Bordeaux, a cold beer are things enjoyed to a degree. Getting sloshed just isn't fun.
Certain cultures seem to encourage drunkenness more than others. The English, Irish and Australians really go for it. So, peer and cultural pressure, along with the availability, would be good candidates for explaining how wide spread this tendency is.

 

[Gracie]

I wonder why I never became a drunk. Mom and Dad owned a bar. Dad did not drink. Mom did. I was raised in or around that bar, so availability was there. Wanting my mother to love me should have been a kicker to be a drinker too, but instead I chose another path. I bailed from her as often as I could....the youngest time was when I was almost 17. I did anything I could do to get away from her...and I did. I just never took up the bottle.

 

[S.J.]

You brought up a great point, Gracie. The part about "I just wondered if anyone has seen what they say and do when drunk and if they saw what WE see, would it make them NOT drink any more". I knew a guy who used to get drunk regularly. His family would try to tell him what an ass he made of himself every time but he didn't believe them because he never remembered what he did. Well, one night they set up a camera and invited him over, let him drink all he wanted, and filmed the whole event. The next day his family showed him the film (this was before video). He was like a bull in a china shop, knocking things over and making an ass out of himself. He watched it (sober) and was embarrassed beyond belief. The man never touched a drop of alcohol after that. Sometimes seeing yourself the way others see you is enough to make you want to change who you are.

 

[Judicial review]

Why you asking me? I'm in no position to comment on this matter. Ask my mother. She's my AA sponser and has been clean and sober for 5 years.

 

[Linkiloo]

Well alcohlism is an illness so I do not think that the typical drunk could just stop having watched a video of himself getting drunk. I do think that self reflection would help in the case of those who just over indulge and don't realise how dumb they look.

I don't drink. I find that it makes me ill and I do not feel happy but in fact unwell. In my twenties I felt differently.

 

[Politico]

Self reflect lol. Perhaps Gracie should 'self reflect' on why she married a drunk.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

Why do you drink to be drunk? I asked Mr Gracie that years ago and he said he started drinking at 18 years old to impress his brothers...who were all drunks as well. He is the youngest son...and has 6 older brothers. 3 are still alive. The other 3 are dead. All are sober now, including Mr Gracie. So for him..it was peer pressure. He was never a sloppy drunk, either. He drank enough to keep a steady buzz. One of those drunks that nobody knows is drunk unless they knew the signs. He didn't go to AA. He said "sitting around a table listening to everyone's sob stories makes me want to go get drunk" so he went to two and said no more. After 42 years of being a daily drunk, he got sober by drinking shitloads of hot tea which he STILL drinks daily. And candy. Lots of candy. This year it will be 7 years of sobriety.

Watching tv shows, like Jail, Cops, etc....even going to kareoke with my SIL a few times and being doomed to sit there as she sang while drunk people wobbled all over the place making asses of themselves, I just wondered if anyone has seen what they say and do when drunk and if they saw what WE see, would it make them NOT drink any more or to NOT WANT to drink any more? Is it pain that makes you drink til you are drunk? Mental pain? Physical pain? Or you just don't remember any more and just do it because you are addicted?

It's been a long time since I have been to an Alanon meeting. I am no longer around drunks...except when I come here to usmb. At least I don't have to live with it in my own home any more, which is a blessing.

So..I thought I would ask the guys (and gals) here that talk about "yes, I'm drunk right now" or "I'm gonna be drunk in a little while" or some such...WHY they do it. And if their families drink too...or are ok with it..or are slowly dying along with you as you kill yourself. And if you are ever embarrassed the next day reading what you posted.

Used to drink when under 21, but once it was legal for me do so I quit after about a year. For me alcohol's loosening of inhibitions just allowed the happy-go-lucky person I am come out to play. At least until the depressant effect had me wanting to go to bed. I could still drink, and if out to dinner with family or over at Mom's for a holiday, if my brother and sister-in-law want strawberry daquiris that they make them, I'll have most of one. But for all intents and purposes, I'm a non-drinker. Been there, done that, why do it again?

Watching various cop reality shows like I do gives me all the motivation not to drink I need when pretty much every interaction between the law and citizenry involves alcohol and other drugs.

 

[Gracie]

Self reflect lol. Perhaps Gracie should 'self reflect' on why she married a drunk.

I can answer that easily. The ol' "I can change him" attitude. "We love each other. I can fix him" bullshit.
Um. No. But try telling young'uns that nowadays, too. They won't listen any more than I did.

 

[September]

I almost never drink intoxicants. I like experiencing Life in all its agonizing glory... and would rather not dull the sensation.

​

 

[LindaVance826]

Alcoholics are assholes. I come from a long line of alcoholics, so I should know. I don't drink because I want to be in control of my body and mind. Most of the drunks I know are intelligent, hard working, lovable people until they start Friday evening and drink until Sunday evening. They can stop drinking for years, but something will eventually cause them to take a drink. And then they can't stop. I have thought that somehow sugar was the culprit with the alcohol making the body crave it. Drunks know they shouldn't drink. They know what they've done to their families and friends. And still they drink.

 

[Gracie]

Sugar appeases whatever it is that starts the craving for alcohol...which is why every AA or NA meeting you enter..there is ALWAYS a huge bowl of candy.
From my understanding..it's a dormant gene. Take a drink, it wakes it up. NA's have a tough time with alcoholism, so I think they all carry that gene. Then again, I am no scientist, so who knows? I just know I was around it all my life and never "got the bug" to be a drunk.

 

[S.J.]

There are no alcoholics, just weak people. Nobody HAS to drink. If you can't handle it, don't drink. It's a disease that will leave you alone if you leave it alone. Most alcoholics I've known are all alike. Life gets a little tough and they crawl inside a bottle so they don't have to deal with it. Their problem isn't alcohol, their problem is running away, then when everyone around them whose lives they ruined finally kick them to the curb, they blame the substance they CHOSE to abuse as the source of their misery.

Alcohol treatment programs vary in their approach but the bottom line in all of them is WILL POWER, the one thing that is always missing in alcoholics and that's not genetics. The fact is that they are not only weak but they're also selfish and inconsiderate in that they allow their lack of self respect and self control to become everyone else's problem We don't do them any favors by blaming their weakness on genetic deficiencies or by saying "they can't help themselves".

 

[Moonglow]

Why you asking me? I'm in no position to comment on this matter. Ask my mother. She's my AA sponser and has been clean and sober for 5 years.

Your mother does not make you drink, you do that on your own...

 

[Moonglow]

Sugar appeases whatever it is that starts the craving for alcohol...which is why every AA or NA meeting you enter..there is ALWAYS a huge bowl of candy.
From my understanding..it's a dormant gene. Take a drink, it wakes it up. NA's have a tough time with alcoholism, so I think they all carry that gene. Then again, I am no scientist, so who knows? I just know I was around it all my life and never "got the bug" to be a drunk.

There are no alcoholics, just weak people. Nobody HAS to drink. If you can't handle it, don't drink. It's a disease that will leave you alone if you leave it alone. Most alcoholics I've known are all alike. Life gets a little tough and they crawl inside a bottle so they don't have to deal with it. Their problem isn't alcohol, their problem is running away, then when everyone around them whose lives they ruined finally kick them to the curb, they blame the substance they CHOSE to abuse as the source of their misery.

Alcohol treatment programs vary in their approach but the bottom line in all of them is WILL POWER, the one thing that is always missing in alcoholics and that's not genetics. The fact is that they are not only weak but they're also selfish and inconsiderate in that they allow their lack of self respect and self control to become everyone else's problem We don't do them any favors by blaming their weakness on genetic deficiencies or by saying "they can't help themselves".

....1 in 8 are alcoholics, the rest will drink in moderation until they die...of that 1 in 8 if their parents were alcoholics genetically they have a 60% greater chance of being an alcoholic.. Alcoholism like any other addiction alters the way the user processes his thinking to the point that he can't control what he is doing...Curing addiction is like curing any other disease, just because one system of rehabilitation does not work does not mean the patient needs to die, it means that another form of rehab is needed....Would you stop trying to cure a cancer patient if one type of cure is not successful?
Hope is man greatest weapon against diseases, will power can't exist if there is no hope...No one needs to be kicked to the curb....relationships can be rebuilt, love will conquer that hate..

 

[Mr. H.]

Mostly out of boredom. I don't drink much in public any more. I never got angry when I was drunk (still don't- except here LOL).
I do have some hilarious stories though.

My brother once asked why I drink. "Because you're happy? Because you're sad? To celebrate? To forget?".

My reply: Yes.

Plus, it helps me go to sleep.

Want to hear some funny stories?

 

[Moonglow]

Mostly out of boredom. I don't drink much in public any more. I never got angry when I was drunk (still don't- except here LOL).
I do have some hilarious stories though.

My brother once asked why I drink. "Because you're happy? Because you're sad? To celebrate? To forget?".

My reply: Yes.

Plus, it helps me go to sleep.

Want to hear some funny stories?

Why not. I am to embarrassed to bring up my 37 year relationship with booze...

 

[S.J.]

Sugar appeases whatever it is that starts the craving for alcohol...which is why every AA or NA meeting you enter..there is ALWAYS a huge bowl of candy.
From my understanding..it's a dormant gene. Take a drink, it wakes it up. NA's have a tough time with alcoholism, so I think they all carry that gene. Then again, I am no scientist, so who knows? I just know I was around it all my life and never "got the bug" to be a drunk.

There are no alcoholics, just weak people. Nobody HAS to drink. If you can't handle it, don't drink. It's a disease that will leave you alone if you leave it alone. Most alcoholics I've known are all alike. Life gets a little tough and they crawl inside a bottle so they don't have to deal with it. Their problem isn't alcohol, their problem is running away, then when everyone around them whose lives they ruined finally kick them to the curb, they blame the substance they CHOSE to abuse as the source of their misery.

Alcohol treatment programs vary in their approach but the bottom line in all of them is WILL POWER, the one thing that is always missing in alcoholics and that's not genetics. The fact is that they are not only weak but they're also selfish and inconsiderate in that they allow their lack of self respect and self control to become everyone else's problem We don't do them any favors by blaming their weakness on genetic deficiencies or by saying "they can't help themselves".

....1 in 8 are alcoholics, the rest will drink in moderation until they die...of that 1 in 8 if their parents were alcoholics genetically they have a 60% greater chance of being an alcoholic.. Alcoholism like any other addiction alters the way the user processes his thinking to the point that he can't control what he is doing...Curing addiction is like curing any other disease, just because one system of rehabilitation does not work does not mean the patient needs to die, it means that another form of rehab is needed....Would you stop trying to cure a cancer patient if one type of cure is not successful?
Hope is man greatest weapon against diseases, will power can't exist if there is no hope...No one needs to be kicked to the curb....relationships can be rebuilt, love will conquer that hate..

Then there are "the enablers". Ahem.

 

[Moonglow]

Alcoholics are assholes. I come from a long line of alcoholics, so I should know. I don't drink because I want to be in control of my body and mind. Most of the drunks I know are intelligent, hard working, lovable people until they start Friday evening and drink until Sunday evening. They can stop drinking for years, but something will eventually cause them to take a drink. And then they can't stop. I have thought that somehow sugar was the culprit with the alcohol making the body crave it. Drunks know they shouldn't drink. They know what they've done to their families and friends. And still they drink.

That is what an addiction is..., the remedy is getting a sponsor to talk to when the urge is pushing the user to use again...or having support peers in the family..

 

[Mr. H.]

Mostly out of boredom. I don't drink much in public any more. I never got angry when I was drunk (still don't- except here LOL).
I do have some hilarious stories though.

My brother once asked why I drink. "Because you're happy? Because you're sad? To celebrate? To forget?".

My reply: Yes.

Plus, it helps me go to sleep.

Want to hear some funny stories?

Why not. I am to embarrassed to bring up my 37 year relationship with booze...

Here's one... I was a Cub Scout Den Leader back in the mid-80's. We held our meetings on Sundays to accommodate a Jewish kid's Sabbath (we even ordered our pizzas with hamburger instead of sausage). I had the damnedest hangover and thought about calling the parents and cancelling. But I marshaled on...

Halfway through our meeting I told the kids that I had to go to the bathroom. I went upstairs, puked my guts out, then went back to the meeting like nothing happened. I must have reaked like booze and vomit.