9 Things I Hate About Everyone

Discussion in 'Humor' started by manu1959, Oct 5, 2005.

  1. manu1959
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    manu1959 Left Coast Isolationist

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    1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

    2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

    3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

    4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

    5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

    6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

    7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

    8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

    9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?
     
  2. dmp
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    dmp Senior Member

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    Because if you EAT your cake, you no longer HAVE your cake. But you WANT to have cake, but you want to EAT cake...but you can't eat it, because then you would no longer HAVE it..

    :)
     
  3. manu1959
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    manu1959 Left Coast Isolationist

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    it would be in my tummy where it belongs
     
  4. Mr. P
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    Mr. P Senior Member

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    Agree with:
    1, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 9

    I do:
    2, 5 ….
     
  5. Abbey Normal
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    Abbey Normal Senior Member

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    The "cake" quote makes no sense because although it is often heard, it isn't the original quote. The correct quote was "You can't eat your cake and have it, too". Now that makes perfect sense.
     
  6. manu1959
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    manu1959 Left Coast Isolationist

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    not true...i have the cake....i just can't eat it again :poke:
     
  7. Mr. P
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    Mr. P Senior Member

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    Yep, if ya eat it, you still have it for a few hours, anyway.
     
  8. Abbey Normal
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    Abbey Normal Senior Member

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    Narrow thinking.


    Edited to add: I just noticed I made my 1,000th post, and it was all between July 5th and October 5th.


    [​IMG]
     
  9. USMCDevilDog
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    USMCDevilDog Member

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    Same, except I do number 6 too.
     
  10. fuzzykitten99
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    fuzzykitten99 Senior Member

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    our tv does not have manual buttons, other than power & volume. cannot change the channel or use the DVD/VCR without a remote.
     

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