What did you teach your parents?

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by alan1, Mar 14, 2009.

  1. alan1
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    alan1 USMB Mod Staff Member Supporting Member

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    My parents taught me a lot of things, as a young lad I only thought it fair to teach them a few things also. Here is a partial list,

    Do not hang a bird feeder in front of a window, then give your son a slingshot/wrist rocket for his birthday. Do expect the same results if you leave the bird feeder there and buy him a BB gun 2 years later.

    Telling girls not to play with matches works. Telling boys not to play with matches causes forest fires.

    Unattended ladders leaning against the house, umbrellas, 8 year old boys and the movie Mary Poppins is a recipe for an emergency room visit. (The good news is that my leg was not broken).

    If you have twin boys between the ages of 2 and 12, never, under any circumstances, leave them alone together for more than 5 minutes unless both of them are sleeping.

    Do not let your 7 year old son know where the axe is after he learns that George Washington chopped down a cherry tree and didn't lie about it, at that age we really don't give a damn if it's redwood or a cherry tree. (Fortunately, the tree fell away from the house).

    Do not tell a 9 year old boy that bleach turns things white if you have a pet that isn't white. A bleach soaked cat will screw up a sofa, an easy chair and 3 bedspreads.

    Do not be distracted by cat scratches on a 9 year old's arms, find the cat first.

    So, what did you teach your parents?
     
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  2. Annie
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    Annie Diamond Member

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    To have very good auto insurance! Funny thing though, when I had to pay for it, stopped having accidents. Go figure! :lol:
     
  3. xotoxi
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    xotoxi Platinum Member

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    A few weeks ago, I taught my parents that 256kB of RAM was painfully slow.

    I also taught them that upgrading to 2GB was easy and rewarding.
     
  4. alan1
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    alan1 USMB Mod Staff Member Supporting Member

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    That's something my parents and my children already know.
     
  5. dilloduck
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    dilloduck Diamond Member

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    More than they ever wanted to know. :lol: Damn I felt sorry for em.
     
  6. alan1
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    alan1 USMB Mod Staff Member Supporting Member

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    Bet you didn't feel sorry for them until you had your own kids.
     
  7. Xenophon
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    Xenophon Gone and forgotten

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    How to use a VCR.
     
  8. Luissa
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    Luissa Annoying Customer Supporting Member

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    same here along with a DVD player, the remote to digital cable, and how to work their new microwave!
     
  9. 007
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    007 Charter Member Supporting Member

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    I taught my mother to never give the keys to a newly licensed, 16 year old hotrod son and expect him to pull the car up to the front of the store to pick her up without hearing the sound of squealing tires.

    No ma... that wasn't me... it was that car over there... :eusa_whistle:
     
  10. editec
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    editec Mr. Forgot-it-All

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    Not a damned thing.

    They were the most recalcitrant people I ever knew.
     

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