Sex in the 90s....1890s

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Avatar4321, Jun 19, 2004.

  1. Avatar4321
    Online

    Avatar4321 Diamond Member Gold Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2004
    Messages:
    70,564
    Thanks Received:
    8,165
    Trophy Points:
    2,070
    Location:
    Minnesota
    Ratings:
    +12,189
    Sex in the (18)90's
    < INSTRUCTION AND ADVICE FOR THE YOUNG BRIDE
    On the Conduct and Procedure of the
    Intimate and Personal Relationships
    of the Marriage State for the
    Greater Spiritual Sanctity of this
    Blessed Sacrament and the Glory of God
    by
    Ruth Smythers beloved wife of
    The Reverend L.D. Smythers
    Pastor of the Arcadian Methodist
    Church of the Eastern Regional Conference
    Published in the year of our Lord 1894
    Spiritual Guidance Press
    New York City


    To the sensitive young woman who has had the benefits of proper upbringing, the wedding day is, ironically, both the happiest and most terrifying day of her life. On the positive side, there is the wedding itself, in which the bride is the central attraction in a beautiful and inspiring ceremony, symbolizing her triumph in securing a male to provide for all her needs for the rest of her life. On the negative side, there is the wedding night, during which the bride must pay the piper, so to speak, by facing for the first time the terrible experience of sex.

    At this point, dear reader, let me concede one shocking truth. Some young women actually anticipate the wedding night ordeal with curiosity and pleasure! Beware such an attitude! A selfish and sensual husband can easily take advantage of such a bride. One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: GIVE LITTLE, GIVE SELDOM, AND ABOVE ALL, GIVE GRUDGINGLY. Otherwise what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual lust.

    On the other hand, the bride's terror need not be extreme. While sex it at best revolting and at worse rather painful, it has to be endured, and has been by women since the beginning of time, and is compensated for by the monogamous home and by the children produced through it.

    It is useless, in most cases, for the bride to prevail upon the groom to forego the sexual initiation. While the ideal husband would be one who would approach his bride only at her request and only for the purpose of begetting offspring, such nobility and unselfishness cannot be expected from the average man.

    Most men, if not denied, would demand sex almost every day. The wise bride will permit a maximum of two brief sexual experiences weekly during the first months of marriage. As time goes by she should make every effort to reduce this frequency. Feigned illness, sleepiness, and headaches are among the wife's best friends in this matter. Arguments, nagging, scolding, and bickering also prove very effective, if used in the late evening about an hour before the husband would normally commence his seduction.

    Clever wives are ever on the alert for new and better methods of denying and discouraging the amorous overtures of the husband. A good wife should expect to have reduced sexual contacts to once a week by the end of the first year of marriage and to once a month by the end of the fifth year of marriage.

    By their tenth anniversary many wives have managed to complete their child bearing and have achieved the ultimate goal of terminating all sexual contacts with the husband. By this time she can depend upon his love for the children and social pressures to hold the husband in the home.

    Just as she should be ever alert to keep the quantity of sex as low as possible, the wise bride will pay equal attention to limiting the kind and degree of sexual contacts. Most men are by nature rather perverted, and if given half a chance, would engage in quite a variety of the most revolting practices. These practices include among others performing the normal act in abnormal positions; mouthing the female body; and offering their own vile bodies to be mouthed in turn.

    Nudity, talking about sex, reading stories about sex, viewing photographs and drawings depicting or suggesting sex are the obnoxious habits the male is likely to acquire if permitted. A wise bride will make it the goal never to allow her husband to see her unclothed body, and never allow him to display his unclothed body to her. Sex, when it cannot be prevented, should be practiced only in total darkness. Many women have found it useful to have thick cotton nightgowns for themselves and pajamas for their husbands. These should be donned in separate rooms. They need not be removed during the sex act. Thus, a minimum of flesh is exposed.

    Once the bride has donned her gown and turned off all the lights, she should lie quietly upon the bed and await her groom. When he comes groping into the room she should make no sound to guide him in her direction, lest he take this as a sign of encouragement. She should let him grope in the dark. There is always the hope that he will stumble and incur some slight injury which she can use as an excuse to deny him sexual access.

    When he finds her, the wife should lie as still as possible. Bodily motion on her part could be interpreted as sexual excitement by the optimistic husband.

    If he attempts to kiss her on the lips she should turn her head slightly so that the kiss falls harmlessly on her cheek instead. If he attempts to kiss her hand, she should make a fist. If he lifts her gown and attempts to kiss her anyplace else she should quickly pull the gown back in place, spring from the bed, and announce that nature calls her to the toilet. This will generally dampen his desire to kiss in the forbidden territory.

    If the husband attempts to seduce her with lascivious talk, the wise wife will suddenly remember some trivial non-sexual question to ask him. Once he answers she should keep the conversation going, no matter how frivolous it may seem at the time.

    Eventually, the husband will learn that if he insists on having sexual contact, he must get on with it without amorous embellishment. The wise wife will allow him to pull the gown up no farther than the waist, and only permit him to open the front of his pajamas to thus make connection.

    She will be absolutely silent or babble about her housework while his huffing and puffing away. Above all, she will lie perfectly still and never under any circumstances grunt or groan while the act is in progress. As soon as the husband has completed the act, the wise wife will start nagging him about various minor tasks she wishes him to perform on the morrow. Many men obtain a major portion of their sexual satisfaction from the peaceful exhaustion immediately after the act is over. Thus the wife must insure that there is no peace in this period for him to enjoy. Otherwise, he might be encouraged to soon try for more.

    One heartening factor for which the wife can be grateful is the fact that the husband's home, school, church, and social environment have been working together all through his life to instill in him a deep sense of guilt in regards to his sexual feelings, so that he comes to the marriage couch apologetically and filled with shame, already half cowed and subdued. The wise wife seizes upon this advantage and relentlessly pursues her goal first to limit, later to annihilate completely her husband's desire for sexual expression.
     
  2. Joz
    Offline

    Joz Senior Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2004
    Messages:
    3,392
    Thanks Received:
    221
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Ratings:
    +221
    Aren't you glad you weren't born back then?
     
  3. Jmarie
    Offline

    Jmarie Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2004
    Messages:
    457
    Thanks Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    16
    Location:
    Iowa
    Ratings:
    +3
    :clap: :clap:
     
  4. pegwinn
    Offline

    pegwinn Top of the Food Chain

    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2004
    Messages:
    2,549
    Thanks Received:
    329
    Trophy Points:
    98
    Location:
    Texas
    Ratings:
    +329
    If that is true, then I wonder how anyone one was born way back then.
     
  5. Avatar4321
    Online

    Avatar4321 Diamond Member Gold Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2004
    Messages:
    70,564
    Thanks Received:
    8,165
    Trophy Points:
    2,070
    Location:
    Minnesota
    Ratings:
    +12,189
    I think it is true.

    However, i dont think anyone listened to this guy who obviously had no clue what he was talking about.
     
  6. Joz
    Offline

    Joz Senior Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2004
    Messages:
    3,392
    Thanks Received:
    221
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Ratings:
    +221
    I know you posted this for the humor, and it is funny, now . But...

    It is true. AND girls listened. This came from a pastor's wife. Why would she steer young women wrong?
    Sex was a wife's duty, something to be endured--not something to be enjoyed. I was told once, that, at one time, wives were not to let their husbands even see them in their slips in order not to wake the animalistic desire in him.

    And too, there wasn't the birth control we have. Women died at an early age--her body just worn out from childbirth,--if she 'gave in' to her husband's desires. So sex was discouraged. That's why husband's would visit certain 'gentlemen's clubs' after dinner. Men had sex with their wives when they wanted to procreate....not for fun.

    And I'd say it's only been in the last 50 years that women have been 'told' sex can be enjoyed by BOTH people involved. We are products of our culture. Thank goodness! or we still would be in the dark ages when it comes to sex.
     
  7. fuzzykitten99
    Offline

    fuzzykitten99 Senior Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2004
    Messages:
    2,965
    Thanks Received:
    199
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    You'll have to check the Marauder's Map...
    Ratings:
    +199
    what was typed about the 'nagging, criticizing," etc., to get the hubby to reduce his requests for sex, is what made me think that this was not a REAL article. I have seen another similar one around, which is pretty funny:

    **note** i just got this from a random site, but I know the basic info is real because my aunt has the textbook that this came from, and I have seen it many times***

    Take Note Ladies ... An Actual Extract from a 1960s Home Economics Textbook
    The Good Wife Guide

    Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return from work. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

    Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch-up your make-up, put ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

    Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Gather up school books, toys, papers, etc. and then run a dustcloth over the tables. During the colder months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

    Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

    Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first, remember his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

    Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late, or goes out to dinner or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.

    Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquillity where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit. Don't greet him with complaints and problems. Don't complain if he's home late for dinner, or even stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange the pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice. Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness.

    Once he has had a chance to have his evening meal, clear the dishes and wash up promptly. If your husband should offer to help, decline his offer as he may feel obliged to repeat this offer and after a long working day he does not need the extra work.

    Encourage your husband to pursue his hobbies and interests and be supportive without seeming to encroach. If you have any little hobbies yourself, try not to bore him speaking of these, as women's interests are often rather trivial compared to men's.

    At the end of the evening tidy the home ready for the morning and again think ahead to his breakfast needs. Your husband's breakfast is vital if he is to face the outside world in a positive fashion.

    Once you have both retired to the bedroom, prepare yourself for bed as promptly as possible. Whilst feminine hygiene is of the utmost importance, your tired husband does not want to queue for the bathroom as he would have to do for his train. But remember to look your best when going to bed. Try to achieve a look that is welcoming without being obvious. If you need to apply face cream or hair rollers, wait until he is asleep as this can be shocking to a man as a last thing at night.

    When it comes to the possibility of intimate relationship with your husband it is important to remember your marriage vows and in particular your commitment to obey him. If he feels that he needs to sleep immediately, then so be it. In all things be lead by your husband's wishes, do not pressure him in any way to stimulate intimacy. Should your husband suggest congress, then accede humbly all the while being mindful than a man's satisfaction is more important than woman's. When he reaches his moment of fulfillment, a small moan from yourself is encouraging to him and quite sufficient to indicate any enjoyment that you may have had. Should your husband suggest any of the more unusual practices, be obedient and obedient and uncomplaining but register any reluctance by remaining silent.

    It is likely that your husband will then fall promptly asleep, so adjust your clothing, freshen up and apply your night time face and hair products. You may then set the alarm so that you can arise shortly before him in the morning. This will enable you to have his morning cup of tea ready when he awakes.

    **edited to fix the link

    http://www.joe-ks.com/archives/Good_Wife_Guide.htm
     
  8. freeandfun1
    Offline

    freeandfun1 VIP Member

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2004
    Messages:
    6,201
    Thanks Received:
    295
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Ratings:
    +296
    sounds like Dr. Laura's book.... the "Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands. My wife read it and it has helped tremendously!
     
  9. fuzzykitten99
    Offline

    fuzzykitten99 Senior Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2004
    Messages:
    2,965
    Thanks Received:
    199
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    You'll have to check the Marauder's Map...
    Ratings:
    +199
    I read that book too. Some feminists say that this is against the feminist revolution. To me, feminists are more masculine than feminine. Being feminine is being woman-like not man-like. There are genetic traits that each gender is pre-disposed to act like...women are genetically predisposed to be more soft and affectionate, and motherly. Males are more aggressive, more tendency to be the hunter & gatherer and the provider. The feminists want to reverse the roles and go against nature.

    i have applied the things in the book to my marriage and i find that both of us are truly happier.
     
  10. Hobbit
    Offline

    Hobbit Senior Member

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2004
    Messages:
    5,099
    Thanks Received:
    420
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Near Atlanta, GA
    Ratings:
    +421
    This is a hoax. I can't remember where I found out now, but this whole thing is just an internet urban legend. For starters, calling sexual intercourse "sex" didn't occur until the entire topic became more public. Also, I've seen this same article in several different places on the internet, and every time, it's been by a different person in a different year. The first time I saw it, it was supposed to be a magazine article from the 1940s, and the page that showed it looked like a digitized magazine page.
     

Share This Page

Search tags for this page

sex in the 1890s