New California Law Requires Separate Restrooms For People Who Think They Are Napoleon Bonaparte

Discussion in 'Political Satire' started by Weatherman2020, Oct 2, 2019.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Weatherman2020
    Offline

    Weatherman2020 Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2013
    Messages:
    51,195
    Thanks Received:
    10,054
    Trophy Points:
    2,100
    Location:
    Left Coast, Classified
    Ratings:
    +63,825
    upload_2019-10-2_20-1-38.jpeg

    SACRAMENTO, CA—A new California law requires businesses to provide separate restrooms for people who think they are Napoleon Bonaparte.

    "Not providing a separate restroom for individuals who believe they are actually the 19th-century French emperor is hateful and wrong," said Governor Gavin Newsom as he signed the bill into law Wednesday, flanked by several people dressed as Napoleon Bonaparte. "We will no longer allow these individuals to be discriminated against."

    The restrooms will have doorways that are just over 5'7" tall. 19th-century French classical music will be playing. When the person finishes using the restroom, a victorious military parade will be thrown in their honor as they march out of the restroom and back into the business.

    "We must affirm these people's beliefs that they are actually Napoleon," said Newsom. "To do anything but reinforce the delusion they've built up around themselves is a hate crime." Those using the new restrooms will be referred to using the pronoun His Imperial and Royal Majesty Napoleon I, By the Grace of God and of the Constitutions of the Empire, Emperor of the French, King of Italy, Mediator of the Swiss Confederation, Protector of the Confederation of the Rhine, Co-Prince of Andorra, under threat of fine or imprisonment.

    Any business that does not comply will be burned to the ground by an invading Napoleonic army.

    New California Law Requires Separate Restrooms For People Who Think They Are Napoleon Bonaparte
     
    • Funny and Agree!! Funny and Agree!! x 1
  2. miketx
    Online

    miketx Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2015
    Messages:
    67,810
    Thanks Received:
    7,703
    Trophy Points:
    1,870
    Location:
    near Throckmorton TX
    Ratings:
    +77,304
    It doesn't surprise me at all.
     
  3. Weatherman2020
    Offline

    Weatherman2020 Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2013
    Messages:
    51,195
    Thanks Received:
    10,054
    Trophy Points:
    2,100
    Location:
    Left Coast, Classified
    Ratings:
    +63,825
    There’s no parody that won’t be reality within a few years now.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  4. Dont Taz Me Bro
    Offline

    Dont Taz Me Bro USMB Mod Staff Member Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2009
    Messages:
    45,373
    Thanks Received:
    10,069
    Trophy Points:
    2,070
    Location:
    Las Vegas, Nevada
    Ratings:
    +36,311
    Closed. New threads require original commentary. Furthermore, you copied and paste of the entire article which is also a violation of the forum rules
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page