Man Passionate Defender Of What He Imagines Constitution To Be

[Quantum Windbag]

Be honest, who does this remind you of right here on this board?

Spurred by an administration he believes to be guilty of numerous transgressions, self-described American patriot Kyle Mortensen, 47, is a vehement defender of ideas he seems to think are enshrined in the U.S. Constitution and principles that brave men have fought and died for solely in his head.
"Our very way of life is under siege," said Mortensen, whose understanding of the Constitution derives not from a close reading of the document but from talk-show pundits, books by television personalities, and the limitless expanse of his own colorful imagination. "It's time for true Americans to stand up and protect the values that make us who we are." According to Mortensen—an otherwise mild-mannered husband, father, and small-business owner—the most serious threat to his fanciful version of the 222-year-old Constitution is the attempt by far-left "traitors" to strip it of its religious foundation.

How about this?

"Dad's great, but listening to all that talk radio has put some weird ideas into his head," said daughter Samantha, a freshman at Reed College in Portland, OR. "He believes the Constitution allows the government to torture people and ban gay marriage, yet he doesn't even know that it guarantees universal health care."

Area Man Passionate Defender Of What He Imagines Constitution To Be | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Amazing how close this gets to the level of debate among some of the posters.

 

[editec]

Yeah, the number of laymen who also happen to be consititution experts among the far right is rather amazing, isn't it?

One would think they might have bothered to go to law school before opining on these issue, but apparently ANYBODY (but the people they call collectivists) can understand the logic of the law.

Anybody except Supreme Court Justices, of course.

Apparently they can't read the law "literally enough" or something.

Ironic isn't it?

According to the super patriots of the right, even plumbers helpers can understand the arcane logic of the law better than people who spent their wholes lives studying the law.

Boggles the mind, it does.

 

[Epsilon Delta]

Wow, QW, that Onion piece really DOES encapsulate about half the debate that occurs in this board.

Props!