Iron Man, spoilers if you want

Discussion in 'Reviews' started by Gungnir, May 3, 2008.

  1. Gungnir
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    Gungnir Member

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    :cuckoo: So I caughts the Matinée of Magnesium Man and it was totally the sucks.
    :eusa_eh:

    Most of the movie is just beauty shots and archetypes. They had as many digital artist in the credits as they did drivers; and they dumped everyone off the Free Way for one shoot.

    Tony Stark is der uber jackass by the way. If not for his AI and Secretary he would curl up in the fetal position and die trying to suck milk from his own nipples.

    Prepare to do the suspension of disbelief thing because you will have a headache when you are done watching it. I don't know what kind of Camera they are using to shoot films now adays but even their panoramic shots feel "scrunched", nothing like the vastness conveyed by Lawernce of Arabia.

    And ohs yeahs, I hads to totallies snorts the three pounds of cocaine after the movie to wakes up my soul froms the sleep of the ded souls whose are totally boreds and so haves killed themsleves because they hates theirs existences. :cuckoo:

    And watch through all the credits, there is a disappointing suprise that makes you want to throw empty beer bottles at the screen which I so totally didn't have which would have made the movie much more enjoyable.
     
  2. RetiredGySgt
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    RetiredGySgt Platinum Member

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    I loved it. I recommend you see it if you like comic book hero movies.

    i did not sit through the credits, what did I miss?
     
  3. Gungnir
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    Gungnir Member

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    SPOILERS





















    Mr. Stark comes back to his home to find his AI on the fritz and lights dimmed. Samuel L. Jackson (Nick Furry) is in his living room in a trench coat and an eye patch. He says he needs help with Avenger.























    END SPOILERS
     
  4. RetiredGySgt
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  5. Skull Pilot
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    if you go to see a comic book movie and you expect lawrence of arabia you ARE going to be disappointed.

    i saw the flick and i liked it. it was entertaining and fun just as it should be
     
  6. Gungnir
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    I was talking about the actual camera work. What ever they are shooting movies with nowadays just gives me headaches. Bourne Ultimatum was the worst yet though.

    SPOILERS


















    How can he have a giant gaping wound in his chest, going through his rib cage, probably sternum, and probably his pectoral muscle, and still have any upper body strength? Where are crates of antiobiotics he needs to be taking? That woman shoved her HAND into his Heart Hole! The guy was in a cave for a ~week with a dirty car battery hooked to his chest! The man is given missiles and he builds power armor? What kind of idiot gives a genius missiles and a tool shop? Why didn't they just have his assistant twirl his mustache? Is an Air Force Procurement Officer really that idiotic? That guy's house had more industrial capacity than most towns! Why does dipshit not make a spare heart magnet battery for just in case? Why was his ass not debriefed while he was in Afghanistan? etc


















    END SPOILERS
     
  7. RetiredGySgt
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    What part of COMIC BOOK Hero do you not understand?
     
  8. Gungnir
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    Gaping hole in chest!!!

    ie Batman Begins: great movie.
     
  9. RetiredGySgt
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    Ya , being bitten by a radioactive spider and gaining super powers is so like, gonna happen. Or being dosed in chemicals and then hit by lightning, ya that will make you have special powers too.

    They are COMIC BOOK characters. Reality is not a requirement and in fact can be a problem for them. Or maybe you can explain Sandman to us all in a scientific manner?
     
  10. Gungnir
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    Why would you think I like Spidey? I hated those movies right down to the actors.
     

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