Got a crazy dilemma, need some advice

[Paulie]

I've been here long enough to have some posters I consider friends, so advice from here can be considered valuable to me.

There's some kind of horrifying details to this story which are more of a side story at the end of the day, but pertinent. So you've been warned.

I opened a preschool with my ex 2 years ago, and at this point I only have a financial interest in the business, which is why this would actually be a concern to me.

There's a 4 year old girl that goes to the school, who was molested by her parents and now is in sole custody with her grandmother. Apparently the little girl comes to school and actually (i hate to say this becuase it's so horrible) 'masturbates' before nap time. One of her classmates walked over to her the other day and saw her doing it and the little girl told her that she has to do it to be able to go to sleep. I'll leave out the actual dialague from the girl because frankly it makes me want to throw up. It happened while the teacher was outside the room, which is against state regulations. What happened was the girl who walked up to her went home and told her parents that theres a girl who...(she used the actual words that the girl told her which I didn't want to mention). That parent obviously called the school with concerns, and it was found out that this has been going on for a couple weeks and the teacher never said anything to my ex or her partner, or the director, NO ONE. The girl's parents kept her out of school for a few days, stringing my ex along about some bullshit, only to find out that she actually pulled her daugher out of the school and put her in my ex's main competitor's school down the road. Needless to say this teacher was fired on the spot, but apparently that wasn't good enough for this girl's parents. The kicker is the parents owe the school $2,000 in back tuition fees, and when my ex's partner called her to try and smooth the situation over and also remind her that she owes a considerable amount of money, she brushed it off and then thought it would be cool to call the police and accuse the school of harrassment, which is ridiculous.

The dilemma is this...obviously my ex is now worried that this kind of situation can be a huge stain on her credibility and image as a caretaker of children, and is faced with the potential of it being spread throughout the competitor's school and eventually to the parents who could of course at any time be potential business for her at some point...my ex's tuition is notably cheaper, her building was completely renovated and has features such as a gym that the competitor doesn't have, not to mention the competitor's school is old, dingy, and has bad history of hygiene with the children. So at any time, my ex could gain some of that business.

I told my ex that it might be a good idea to reach out to the owner of the other school in a completely friendly manner, and advise them that this lady owes considerable money, is apparently attempting to pull some shenanigans to try and get out of the debt, and that she wants the owner to know what she might be getting herself into.

Frankly I don't know what to do. It's obviously not my ex's fault, because unless the teacher reports this, how the hell is anyone supposed to know about it? But regardless of who's fault it is, it's a stain on her reputation while she's still trying to build the business.

What are the thoughts on this?

 

[del]

if there is some kind of licensing body for the teacher, report her to that body. beyond that, i'd write off the $2k and let it go. i don't think anything you do from here on will make the situation any better, and it can always get worse. make certain that her obligations as a mandated reporter are met, and chalk it up to experience.

 

[Baruch Menachem]

Basically report the woman to the folks at the credit agencies, but otherwise it is an un collectable debt. Which would also go on the credit report.

You might even consider it a favor to you, as folks who run up bad debts are good at stringing folks along. You might have lost more than 2 grand to this woman if she hadn't dumped you first.

 

[California Girl]

I'd get some decent legal advice. You might ask Jillian?

 

[waltky]

I believe you have an instance of a bad business debt which is deductible on your tax return...

... discuss this with your tax accountant...

... it may not be too late to report the situation to child protective/social services...

... obviously the girl needs some help...

... report only what you need to report to the credit agencies to avoid being sued for libel...

... discuss this with people at the credit agencies...

... you might try putting the parent on a re-payment schedule for the balance owed or take her to small claims court...

... I would advise against telling your competitor as it could get back to the parent and open yourself to being sued, again, for either libel or slander.

 

[freedombecki]

I've been here long enough to have some posters I consider friends, so advice from here can be considered valuable to me.

There's some kind of horrifying details to this story which are more of a side story at the end of the day, but pertinent. So you've been warned.

I opened a preschool with my ex 2 years ago, and at this point I only have a financial interest in the business, which is why this would actually be a concern to me.

There's a 4 year old girl that goes to the school, who was molested by her parents and now is in sole custody with her grandmother. Apparently the little girl comes to school and actually (i hate to say this becuase it's so horrible) 'masturbates' before nap time. One of her classmates walked over to her the other day and saw her doing it and the little girl told her that she has to do it to be able to go to sleep. I'll leave out the actual dialague from the girl because frankly it makes me want to throw up. It happened while the teacher was outside the room, which is against state regulations. What happened was the girl who walked up to her went home and told her parents that theres a girl who...(she used the actual words that the girl told her which I didn't want to mention). That parent obviously called the school with concerns, and it was found out that this has been going on for a couple weeks and the teacher never said anything to my ex or her partner, or the director, NO ONE. The girl's parents kept her out of school for a few days, stringing my ex along about some bullshit, only to find out that she actually pulled her daugher out of the school and put her in my ex's main competitor's school down the road. Needless to say this teacher was fired on the spot, but apparently that wasn't good enough for this girl's parents. The kicker is the parents owe the school $2,000 in back tuition fees, and when my ex's partner called her to try and smooth the situation over and also remind her that she owes a considerable amount of money, she brushed it off and then thought it would be cool to call the police and accuse the school of harrassment, which is ridiculous.

The dilemma is this...obviously my ex is now worried that this kind of situation can be a huge stain on her credibility and image as a caretaker of children, and is faced with the potential of it being spread throughout the competitor's school and eventually to the parents who could of course at any time be potential business for her at some point...my ex's tuition is notably cheaper, her building was completely renovated and has features such as a gym that the competitor doesn't have, not to mention the competitor's school is old, dingy, and has bad history of hygiene with the children. So at any time, my ex could gain some of that business.

I told my ex that it might be a good idea to reach out to the owner of the other school in a completely friendly manner, and advise them that this lady owes considerable money, is apparently attempting to pull some shenanigans to try and get out of the debt, and that she wants the owner to know what she might be getting herself into.

Frankly I don't know what to do. It's obviously not my ex's fault, because unless the teacher reports this, how the hell is anyone supposed to know about it? But regardless of who's fault it is, it's a stain on her reputation while she's still trying to build the business.

What are the thoughts on this?

If this is true, I think you are going through a very hellish problem.

I think the teacher who left the room against state rules probably needed as much supervision as the worst child in that school but didn't get it, and the state teacher's licensing board needs to ensure she will never do such a thing in their state again to another child.

If you go after the parent for the $2,000, their lawyer will go after your business for all you have for child neglect. They could do it anyway.

The ball is in their court, and they may be satisfied just by getting their daughter out of that situation with the trash-mouthed molested child. If so, you are extremely fortunate, indeed.

Your ex-wife, for reasons not spoken in your post, failed to supervise staff. She needs to review the hiring process and if need be, do more thorough checking of work histories of her teachers and find out why they left their last position. Blind trust of a cunning smooth talker has destroyed many a business employer. Child neglect of a troubled child is not a pretty resume.

I'm sorry your business is having so many problems right now. I do so wish you the best.

 

[Mr.Nick]

If I was a MOD I'd ban that motherfucker right now.

 

[jillian]

I'd get some decent legal advice. You might ask Jillian?

jillian isn't allowed to give legal advice over the internet, particularly to someone out of state. it would violate the canons of ethics and my employment agreement.

he should seek legal assistance locally as laws differ. there are places that give consultations for minimal or no cost. if he calls his local bar association, they can make appropriate referrals.

 

[hortysir]

Is the one owing money the molested girl and her parents or the family of the girl that walked up on the other??

I don't think it would be a wasted call to Child Services, regardless.
And tip off the other school.

 

[Paulie]

I appreciate the feedback. The issue wasn't so much collecting the $2000, as it was maybe using it as leverage for damage control, i.e. the minds of parents who use the competitor's school being poisoned by the information about the troubled child spreading throughout.

Basically I was wondering if it would be considered proper business to notify the competitor that this lady already has problems paying at a CHEAPER school. Maybe it could minimize the damage that might be done. I wouldn't be surprised though if the competitor saw it as a perfect way to damage my ex's reputation and prevent any parents from ever possibly leaving and going to her school. Even though my ex used to send all her infant prospects to that school before she made some modifications inside the building to comply with the separate regulations for having infants.

As far as the suggestions about child protective services, that may be jumping the gun right now. My ex is going to talk to the grandmother about the issue and let her have the chance to handle that situation before the state comes in and imposes any more of their will than they probably already do. The poor girl already doesn't have parents, God forbid she loses her grandmother too.

 

[Paulie]

Is the one owing money the molested girl and her parents or the family of the girl that walked up on the other??

The latter.

 

[Wry Catcher]

I've been here long enough to have some posters I consider friends, so advice from here can be considered valuable to me.

There's some kind of horrifying details to this story which are more of a side story at the end of the day, but pertinent. So you've been warned.

I opened a preschool with my ex 2 years ago, and at this point I only have a financial interest in the business, which is why this would actually be a concern to me.

There's a 4 year old girl that goes to the school, who was molested by her parents and now is in sole custody with her grandmother. Apparently the little girl comes to school and actually (i hate to say this becuase it's so horrible) 'masturbates' before nap time. One of her classmates walked over to her the other day and saw her doing it and the little girl told her that she has to do it to be able to go to sleep. I'll leave out the actual dialague from the girl because frankly it makes me want to throw up. It happened while the teacher was outside the room, which is against state regulations. What happened was the girl who walked up to her went home and told her parents that theres a girl who...(she used the actual words that the girl told her which I didn't want to mention). That parent obviously called the school with concerns, and it was found out that this has been going on for a couple weeks and the teacher never said anything to my ex or her partner, or the director, NO ONE. The girl's parents kept her out of school for a few days, stringing my ex along about some bullshit, only to find out that she actually pulled her daugher out of the school and put her in my ex's main competitor's school down the road. Needless to say this teacher was fired on the spot, but apparently that wasn't good enough for this girl's parents. The kicker is the parents owe the school $2,000 in back tuition fees, and when my ex's partner called her to try and smooth the situation over and also remind her that she owes a considerable amount of money, she brushed it off and then thought it would be cool to call the police and accuse the school of harrassment, which is ridiculous.

The dilemma is this...obviously my ex is now worried that this kind of situation can be a huge stain on her credibility and image as a caretaker of children, and is faced with the potential of it being spread throughout the competitor's school and eventually to the parents who could of course at any time be potential business for her at some point...my ex's tuition is notably cheaper, her building was completely renovated and has features such as a gym that the competitor doesn't have, not to mention the competitor's school is old, dingy, and has bad history of hygiene with the children. So at any time, my ex could gain some of that business.

I told my ex that it might be a good idea to reach out to the owner of the other school in a completely friendly manner, and advise them that this lady owes considerable money, is apparently attempting to pull some shenanigans to try and get out of the debt, and that she wants the owner to know what she might be getting herself into.

Frankly I don't know what to do. It's obviously not my ex's fault, because unless the teacher reports this, how the hell is anyone supposed to know about it? But regardless of who's fault it is, it's a stain on her reputation while she's still trying to build the business.

What are the thoughts on this?

1. Train your staff and have written policies signed off by all staff;

2. Have a parents meeting. Explain in detail - withholding the names of the children and their parents of course - what happened, what you did and didn't do. Keep in mind they'll hear about it and what they hear will usually be worse than the truth;

3. Eat the $2,000 unless the teacher had been trained and you have documenation that s/he should have known what to do and neglected to do so. If s/he had been trained and the training is documented and s/he failed to follow written policy also documented you might want to withhold any earned income and bill him or her for your loss;

If you had not trained the teacher, better not, you might be the one to be sued for failure to train; even if s/he was an at will employee s/he may be able to prove a harm and the loss of future earnings when terminated for cause;

4. Speak with an attorney before doing anything or following the advice of anyone on the internet.

 

[Paulie]

The $2000 is already assumed to be eaten. That's small potatoes compared to the loss of revenue that could come from future lost enrollees over this matter.

Damage control is what I was looking for suggestions on.

 

[chikenwing]

4. Speak with an attorney before doing anything or following the advice of anyone on the internet

This is all you need to know,good luck!!

 

[g5000]

Reason number 685,399 to hate child molestors.