*A father is someone who carries pictures where his money use to be. *Father to son: "When Abe Lincoln was your age he was studying books by the light of the fireplace". Son's reply, "When he was your age, he was President"! *Father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read, The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt. His son asked, "What happened to the flea"?