Empathy Training

Discussion in 'Health and Lifestyle' started by Sky Dancer, Apr 23, 2012.

  1. Sky Dancer
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    Sky Dancer BANNED

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    Non-Violent Communication:

    EMPATHY: Ways We Stay Connected to Feelings & Needs

    �� Give your full attention to another by either silently or verbally connecting to their feelings
    and needs.

    �� Be willing to set yourself aside and completely enter the other’s world with acceptance and
    respect.


    NOT EMPATHY: Ways We Disconnect with Feelings & Needs

    �� SYMPATHY: Bring attention back to yourself. “Oh, I am so sorry, I feel terrible for you.”

    �� ADVICE: We assume the person needs information. “Well, what you could do is. . . “.

    �� EXPLAIN / ANALYZE: We believe we know why someone feels the way we do and
    think knowing why will change their feeling state. “You’re just feel bad because . . . “

    �� CORRECT: We try to point out someone’s mistake in interpreting. “He didn’t do that to
    hurt you, he was just in a hurry.”

    �� CONSOLE: “It will be okay. You’re okay, everything will work out.”

    �� TELL A STORY: “The same thing happened to me. This one time . . .”

    �� PUSH AWAY FEELINGS: We might be uncomfortable so we tell others not to feel what
    they feel. “Come on smile, don’t be sad.” “Just calm down and take a deep breath”

    �� INVESTIGATE / INTEROGATE: “Why did you do that? What made you feel that
    way?”

    �� EVALUATE: We decide if another’s emotional response is appropriate or not. “You are
    over reacting. This is no big deal.”

    �� EDUCATE: “What I see about the situation is . . . “ “The reason you feel like that is. . . “

    �� ONE-UP: “That’s awful, but something even worse happened to me and I was devastated.”

    �� DIAGNOSE: “Sounds like you had a panic attack. I know some good herbs for anxiety.”

    �� DEMAND: “If you don’t get control of your emotions, I’m leaving!”

    �� DENIAL OF CHOICE: “It’s a hard thing, but we all have to do it.”

    �� NOD & SMILE You feel uncomfortable and just want to get out of the situation.
     
  2. Peach
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    Peach Gold Member

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    Thank you for this, Sky.
     
  3. Sky Dancer
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    You're welcome. I've just started studying it. It's quite wonderful stuff. Marshall Rosenberg does peacemaking all over the world using Non-Violent Communication methods.
     
  4. FuelRod
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    FuelRod Gold Member

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    Pfffttt. Who cares?


    Oh, sorry that's apathy.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 2
  5. Peach
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    Peach Gold Member

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    Many humans do. :eusa_angel:
     
  6. Sky Dancer
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    Sky Dancer BANNED

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    Leonard Cohen, a famous poet and songwriter entered a Buddhist monastery and did a retreat for six years. I heard that he has started to gather a crowd around him when he walks in the park. I asked my friend, what is he doing, meditating, giving a dharma talk? She said no, none of that.

    When Cohen came out of that retreat, he started spending some time sitting in a park. People started to sit with him, and talk to them about their lives. All he does, is listen and offer his full attention. They tell their stories, and feel better afterward.
     
  7. syrenn
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    syrenn BANNED

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    This wasn't so long ago either.... i guess that flavor of the month is not so great anymore either....

    just saying.



    :eusa_whistle:
     
  8. California Girl
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    California Girl BANNED

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    I feel sorry for you.

    That's sympathy. :lol:
     
  9. California Girl
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    California Girl BANNED

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    Then, he turns their stories into songs and makes millions. :lol:
     

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