Combat For Dummies

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Shattered, Jun 17, 2005.

  1. Shattered
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    Shattered Guest

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    :D:D:D

    Combat for Dummies
    Advice and instructions taken from actual military sources. Some of these guys must have had a sense of humor

    "Aim towards the enemy."
    --Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher

    "When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
    --U.S. Marine Corps
    "Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
    --USAF Ammo Troop

    "If the enemy is in range, so are you."
    --Infantry Journal

    "A slipping gear could let your m203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
    --Army's magazine of prevention maintenance

    "It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."
    --U.S. Air Force manual

    "Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo."
    --Infantry Journal

    "Tracers work both ways."
    --U.S. Army Ordnance

    "Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
    --Infantry Journal

    "Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
    --David Hackworth

    "If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."
    --Infantry Journal

    "No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
    --Joe Gay

    "Any ship can be a minesweeper....once."
    --Anon

    "Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do."
    --Unknown Marine Recruit

    "Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
    --Infantry Journal

    "If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."
    --USAF Ammo Troop
     
  2. CSM
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    CSM Senior Member

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    There is so much veritas that originates in the foxhole!
     
  3. Shattered
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    "Aim towards the enemy."
    --Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher

    "When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
    --U.S. Marine Corps


    My favorites. :D
     
  4. padisha emperor
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    padisha emperor Senior Member

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    "When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."

    "Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo

    Any ship can be a minesweeper....once

    :D :D
     
  5. pegwinn
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    pegwinn Top of the Food Chain

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    "Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do."
    --Unknown Marine Recruit

    "Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
    --Infantry Journal

    The first is universal, learned about a half second after the haircut, by osmosis. The second is the master understatement. It is so understated [badpun] it's origins must be English [/badpun]
     

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